Matty? Do not despair. Help is on its way...

Okay. So maybe you aren't Matty. Here's my number: ***********. Call me. Don't worry, be happy.

Dear anonymous, your message itself is the proof that you can still love, and be loved. How to find the right guy though.... Let me tell you this: a woman who is successful in her work and financially independent can count her blessings. Too many girls in China know only how to spend money and when they outgrow their parents' support learn how to rely on sugardaddies that aren't in it for the love. And neither are those girls, see the articles about luxury goods and sex parties. And twisted family relations and divorce (?). You wouldn't want that.

What you do want won't be easy to find. I'd hope your times of workout at the gym or shopping would be in the company of some valued (girl)friend. Maybe you should try to find other women in the same situation to begin with. It's always a good thing to know you're not alone. And maybe such company can make you dare to visit places that you wouldn't have thought of. (Now that you've found your way to this website 'for foreigners'.... don't be shy to talk to them as well, your English is good enough, but be prepared for anything. Idiots are everywhere).

What can I say? I wish you all the best. My heart cries for you.

Yes, you can. Find a good guy. Just keep looking. If you seek, you shall find. Knock, and it will be opened for you. Might take a year or so, but do it.

And never settle. Find someone who actually loves you, and whom you actually love. Nothing's worse than dating someone you don't love, or who doesn't love you. Trust me, it gets bad fast.

Find a guy who will respect you, and whom you can communicate with. I had a lot of communication barriers with my first Chinese gf. Big mistake.

Crimo   do you want to get this one ?

and how do you expect people to find you if you stay anonymous?

Crimo, I do believe your help is needed here...

You could hang around hostels looking for men or quit spending time alone, even if you just go for walks. Try to meet more people. If you have friends go out with them and meet their friends. Eventually you will meet someone and have a mutual attraction. It may take some time to get to know them and for sparks to fly, just be relaxed around people and have fun. I think having fun is key to enjoying someones company. Take it slow. Look for someone that you have things in common with. You will not meet anyone by watching TV alone. And dress well, make your self as attractive as you can.

Thanks all for the answers.

Vyborg- I did try hanging out with girls " in the same boat" before, but as we are similar,

we dont have much interesting subjects to talk about personal life except dinning out,going bar or KalaOK. I stopped to get together with them almost 2 years. I want to meet people with positive energy.  i also heard some "stories" regarding"Chinese girl and foreign man" , what i can say,  over- adoration  and misunderstanding of western culture and western civilization;and physical attraction,probably this is the reason.  I meet people worldwide at work, I speak 3 foreign languages,so  language would never be my barrier to communicate with people, but "equal quality" matters. 

I believe in Quality before Quantity. Am I old fashioned?

iew profile

Red-Fox:  Am not despaired. I just wanna share thoughts and exchange ideas here with people. Who is Matty? your ex?

TedDBayer - No worry!  Am not Tomboy, On the contrary, am quite stylish in all aspects.

                        Seeking men on the street is not my way,getting out of home and getting to know people is what i need to change. I agree totally!                       

It sounds like you are a successful shengnv who chose your career over love.

Don't despair, take chances, and concentrate on whatever makes you happy.

You don't know how to meet people? Seriously? You are Chinese and speak English. You live in GZ. There are so many people, including expats, in GZ. Go out and hang out at Starbucks and make yourself look inviting (don't read, don't use headphones, keep looking up and around). When you are on the bus look for opportunities to ask a nice looking guy for the time. 

I choose to have my own career , that’s because I think I can do it better than to be a housewife’s job. When you have the ability and chance, I am sure everyone would choose the same way as I did. The only difference is, when men at my age who are successful, they are greatly welcome by girls; but for women on my situation, not acceptable by the society and guys. Its unfair indeed. Guys always like a younger body than a smart brain, because younger girls are obey, no have much desires and idea about life yet, guys can “manage “ easily; on the other hand, men think young girl can bring more physical pleasure, am I right?  For me, “Equal quality” is always in the priority, but such “quality” men are basically attracted by young girls, this is the embarrassing that am facing now. If couldnt get what I want, I’d rather go ahead with my own career and stay single, at least career can bring me confidence, freedom as well as security, not be kicked out of door by guys.Haha…   

You could always try Sex in China on a 30 Day visa ?   have a read of the post and help it get to page 4 in the next 10 months 

There are millions of single girls out there who are financially independent and are enjoying being alone. Being comfortable with being alone is a common factor for most of these single girls. Your are still young so you shouldn't be so insecure about younger women.  Be like the rose that stay still, the butterfly will come and pitch soon enough. In the meantime enjoy your single life, because once you find a partner their will be many moments where you'll wish for the days of singleness.

Love is not easy, if it lasts.