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Posts: 981

Shifu

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Q: Do you have any advice for a weary expat for finding his way home?

10 years 17 weeks ago in  Culture - China

 
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Posts: 981

Shifu

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Should probably add some info - yes that means leaving China rather than "oh shit who moved my home?!!"

mArtiAn:

  Actually as legend has it the great Lee Marvin used to get so drunk when out on the town that he'd sometimes turn up on the door of some house he used to live in in Beverley Hills, then have to go and buy a map to the homes of the stars to find his way home.

10 years 16 weeks ago
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10 years 17 weeks ago
 
Posts: 379

Governor

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That all depends on where home may be?

 

But good luck to you anyway.

happywanderer:

UK.  And thanks.

10 years 16 weeks ago
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IrvineWelsh:

I will see you there soon...

10 years 16 weeks ago
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10 years 17 weeks ago
 
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Emperor

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Get a job ASAP.

 

Don't wanna get too bored. If I didn't live in a rural shithole, I'd probably be working now, too.

Paulberger:

I've always wondered what part of the states a hulk is from? Are they indeginious to my neck of the woods? (California)

10 years 16 weeks ago
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dom87:

i guess there is the biggest problem nowadays. not so easy to find a job back home, especially if you are still in china

10 years 16 weeks ago
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Nessquick:

yep, everywhere i write, so their reply is :

" could you come tomorrow for interview ? "

" sorry, i am still in china. "

" okay, sorry, but we have to skip to next candidate, good luck"

10 years 16 weeks ago
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Hulk:

I'm in Arizona, Paul. Kinda close to you, actually.

10 years 16 weeks ago
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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
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Emperor

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keep busy once you have settled back in

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
Posts: 561

Governor

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head due north and follow the stream... if you build it, they will come...

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
Posts: 48

Governor

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Dont let the culture shock get the better of you. I was a way from home in the UK for a year studying. Went home for 6 weeks and it took some adjusting. Then I came here and it was another type of culture shock I wasnt expecting. Eventually I'll feel it again when I leave here myself, whenever that is. 

 

Anyway surround yourself with your closest friends and get pissed the first day back. Then while your nursing you hangover the next morning, apply for jobs. I rather liked the UK when I was in York. Lots of foriegners and more than 60 of the students there were Chinese. 

 

In Poland, home for me, there aren't many Chinese at all. Warsawmaybe but not where I come from. Good luck to you and safe travels. 

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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if you can make more money in China, stay in China. If you can make the same amount back home (or anywhere else), just go.

 

dom87:

there are also alot of different things than money to take into consideration.

 

quality of life

social aspects

health

stupidity

sanity

 

etc.

10 years 16 weeks ago
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andy74rc:

Dom, you're very right. That's why I said "more money". It's to offset and compensate all the other elements. Otherwise, it would be plain stupid.
Once enough is enough, then look for a better comfort in terms of quality of life

10 years 16 weeks ago
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angelina8:

Come on, how can money offset health issues? Imagine your baby gets sick.

10 years 16 weeks ago
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andy74rc:

I just don't see any other good reason to stay here.....

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
Posts: 4397

Emperor

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  Once you remember which country it was in the rest will slowly come back to you. Where did you last see it?

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
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Governor

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Look for a job!

Don't forget that you will be starting a new life. You're not going back home, you'll be making a new home for yourself.

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
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Emperor

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Why are you leaving China?  Have you lived in more than one place here?

Are you heading back to the UK?

 

royceH:

Duh......'heading home'.  Guess that doesn't mean anywhere else....   :-p  

 

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
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As some suggested about getting a job ASAP (e.g. Hulk) , it is my experiences or feelings that as long as I am in China and  I still apply for it, the chances are less. I have been trying a lot and most of the response are kinda "drag your ass here and apply. We are not going to secure a job for you as long as you are way long from here."

That is the reason, I have decided I will move next year. if you are prepared to leave mentally, that is more important. Prepare for all scenarios, I am pretty sure job can be found.

Save some money for surviavl for 2 months,or 3 months, or 4 months or 6 months. I don't think it will be longer than that to get a job. The more I or we, who ultimately want to leave China, stay here the less chance and more struggle we have to face back home when we leave.

By the way, I am going to try my luck in Canada with my GF. If that doesn't work (within 6 months) then we move back to Australia. 

 

The point is: if you are determined to leave, don't think much, just leave without hesitation. Buddhism says: Any actions you are taking now or happens with you now will prepare for the best in the next present (or future). It is always the best to listen your mind. 

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
Posts: 915

Shifu

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Hard to fight a compulsion when you feel it's time to exercise it. Go home. Yes, there will be some reverse culture shock, but you haven't been away for that long, have you?

You'll miss China, but you'll get over it in due time. Family and friends will contribute a lot to your repatriation. Embrace your peeps as they will be there for you to make the necessary re-adjustments you need to make.

I beg to differ with what many posters advise: get a job immediately. My advice is: no need to hustle immediately to find a job. Relax. Let your family and friends provide you with whatever comfort you may need when you feel like you may have made a mistake by leaving China and you want to return.

Get acclimated, chill out with the people you love, and after you go through the shock of being back "home", you'll feel your motivation slowly but surely return. And before you know it, you'll be back on track, whistlin' Dixie, re-grouping, and re-surging. Cut yourself a little slack and then start looking for work. You'll now have the energy and staying power to look for and lock in a job. And everything else will fall into place.

So, that's it. Go home. Be sad and wistful. You earned it. Feel sorry you left. You earned that, too. But sooner or later, you'll find your groove back home. Maybe even meet someone truly special who will take your mind off your China experience, at least, for a spell... or for the long run...

Oh. Another tip. When you get home, write about your stay in China. If you don't write, start now (or later). Despite what Thomas Wolfe has to say about it, you CAN go home again.

Send us a postcard with the good news! 

andy74rc:

Beautiful, beautiful post Red Fox (seriously). Now, you just made me willing to go buy tickets right away....

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
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Governor

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Definitely wait until you are back home to start looking for a job. Take a day or two to relax and getting settled back into a no longer familiar environment. Take a walk, meet up with old friends, eat familiar foods etc. Then on Day 3 or 4, hit the ground running and you'll land a job quickly I am sure. Good Luck! Smile

CARLGODWIN1983:

This, and if you have read my other threads and comments over the last month, you will have read that I have been forced to come home as my new visa was refused/declined.

 

Now I am back, I am quite happy  I am only quite happy because the one I love is there and not here with me, but I am trying to find a solution to that.  I say that, at the time of speaking, we have a semi-solution, but I am working on making it a permanent solution.

 

Happy,

 

Do what has been said on the last comment.  It's sound advice.  Never look back.  Work on heading somewhere else instead.

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Governor

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House is where HOME is.

HOUSE becomes HOME with love and food.

Find (If you not have) or Re-invent (If you already have) your LOVE LIFE and a job here; you will find your HOME here.

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10 years 16 weeks ago
 
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