They don't think of independence as a good thing, and never have. There's even a bunch of ancient Chinese poems about how independence is deeply immoral. And look at all the signs they put up about collectively doing this and that.

this is true. and they never learn or are taught to break away from it. schools encourage them to lean on their teachers and classmates when they should be taught to solve problems themselves. asking for help means they are asking for you to do the work for them. and they carry this into their careers a fromer student asked me for help in completing  a task for her job she ended up not talking to me after i asked her leading questions that would have helped her figure it out herself

Ah, yes.  This is the story of my life in China.  Girls think I will marry them but I tell them I will never marry a girl who is wholly dependent on me to live.  I am helping my current gf to become a woman of means and develop independent thinking.  It is an uphill battle but I am optimistic.

I think when they reach their 20's, in university or whatever, they admire independence and yearn for it, but their socialisation from home doesn't allow it.

Maybe in the future...

It's not only the case with chinese, it is the same thing with other countries. If you spend too much money on your kids unless they realise the worth of it they would just be a brat wasting money. Most chinese fail to understand the value of good moral education, like not being proud of your origin or power, or not shitting, puking, pissing, spitting in public. It's just that it came to be accepted by chinese society that no one wants to change here. Anyway, the main reason I feel is the one child policy here (even though there are soem loopholes in it), the parents just spoil the child until he becomes a ridicule to others or a punk who knows no shame.