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Posts: 9192

Emperor

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Q: Is it hard for Chinese to adapt to the West?

There's been some threads on marriage to Chinese and visa, so I was reading. I was looking at marriage stats for Chinese women coming west. The culture shock, food and climate often leads to divorce. It's cleaner here, the air, food and water (maybe) are better. You can walk across a street without fear. Other than language, how hard is it to come west? What would be so hard about living here? No basket for tissue?
i also found stories about women trying to slip unnoticed out of airport washrooms after landing here. So I have to wonder if there is any culture shock or just a desire to be here at any cost.

12 years 23 weeks ago in  Culture - China

 
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Posts: 783

Shifu

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I think the reality is too much of a shock,once Chinese go to a different culture,westerners are learened or at least taught about different cultures..chinese are only taught about 5000 years of their own jaded history,focusing on the last 60 maybe 70 years. Most do not understand,or compprehend there is a world outside of China even after 6 years at university,my wife is Chinese married for 5 years 2 children together,shes a college graduate lived in UK for 2 years and still thinks Taiwan is part of China.It has its own Army goverment,borders you cant argue with some may say Ignorance some say Blindness

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12 years 23 weeks ago
 
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I would say that there is one hell of a cultural shock. This is mainly because no matter what they say and promise, once they arrive to a Western country they want to continue their lives as if they were still in China. I had a friend who after receiving his wife in USA, had difficulties from day one. Like everything was so dirty.... (maybe because she was not the one that did the cleaning), or throwing everything in the freezer out because frozen food is not healthy.
Instead of learning a new culture, customs and traditions, they insist doing everything in their own way. No Western food, sending money back home to family, daily chats on telephone with friends back home, etc.
And if you approach the privacy of marital life, the BS gets a lot sicker and thicker....... No french kissing (can get hepatitis from it), wash your hands before touching me, nothing sexual while menstruating, no sodomy or oral sex (that's dirty !), shaving off pubic hair is against nature who put it there, and no need for foreplay, just fire away. One that gets to me is "no public expressions of affection", they tell you once (before marriage) they love you, and then no need to say it again, alredy told you once.

No wonder 75 % of these marriages end up in a divorce within 2 to 3 years. And that is not counting the many that marry you for economic reasons and to leave China, and will divorce you the second they get the permanent visa issued.

This is why after retirement, I moved to China and entered the "friends with benefits" rank.

kikoya:

"once they arrive to a Western country they want to continue their lives as if they were still in China" That's funny, the same could be said about a lot of westerners arriving to China. The difference is that the Chinese in the west will just go their way while the westerners here will always claim that their way is the only one to go

12 years 23 weeks ago
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nevermind:

He "received" her. SO what he met her online?

12 years 23 weeks ago
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12 years 23 weeks ago
 
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They often have a really hard time getting used to the way we socialize and our sense of humour. They have a lot of trouble reading us and sometimes find themselves in a state of constant panic when they can't figure out where they stand with anyone.

TedDBayer:

I did notice the humour difference. I have to explain why oral witty humour is funny to people that spoke good English and that kills it, The only way I could get laughs was actions or imitations. I think stand up comedy would choke in China. I bet no one watches Bugs Bunny or Groucho.

12 years 23 weeks ago
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