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Q: Lack of choice? What would WE do?
Okay, let me quote samsara first:
"Regarding “lack of choice”: Chinese people cite lack of choice as an excuse for everything. Making intelligent decisions and taking personal responsibility isn’t a Chinese tradition. It’s much easier to go through life passively, not make decisions for yourself, do what your parents say, then complain about how your life turned out."
Now here's the framework: you're propelled as a basic citizen of a society much like China's. You're out of the matrix but people around you aren't, though sadly you share the same nationality and your passport doesn't offer you many options. Let's say you're a uni fresh graduate, so you have some doors opened for some basic office job in the city that's likely to take most of your energy. So nothing too good, but you still have your common sense and your clear mind, and, let's say three or four months of savings before money is a problem. Let's not consider parental pressures so it doesn't get too complex, but all other social pressures are there. What choices do you make? What would you do? What would you refuse to do and how would you face the consequences?
Don't feel restrained by my parameters. I'm obviously asking an open question.
all culture are different. every human presents his/ her culture where ever he or she goes, if your friends are making some problems for you even you share every thing similar with them at least you ought to tell them and let them know how you feel about certain things and issues...
intelligences comes with creativity and experience. Chinese lacks creativity in solving many issues especially the human issue they are insensitive to many things so do not bother about them much or expect too much..
in the end listen to your heart and mind together, act accordingly, do whatever you can do in your capacity, power and ability. learn to refuse and say No.parental pressure exists everywhere in the world. whatever country you choose but pressure is always on your ass. no one else. always weigh up the pros and cons for every decision you make..
fresh grads are always the KFC chicken everyone want to bite and release their frustrations. so have a big heart and very open mind like space itself to adjust yourself in this highly competitive world... do not lose courage and hope... stay happy and be positive...
If I am a citizen of a country like China (do I understand you correctly?), there are very few options. Being out of the Matrix doesn't mean I exist outside of the system and the community mindset. My options would be limited by my experience. I would need to rely on my personal talents and find bonds with others who also desire to transcend the system. My first struggle would be not to get trapped into a conventional life. Absorb outside cultures and meet a wide variety of people. Most important of all, study people and their motives. Do all of this as independently from family as possible until I am strong enough to make a mark on society rather than the other way around.
I would travel with that money, evade the matrix of the immediate surrounding circumstances. After a "bath" of people and cultures, others than mine, I would have opened even further the horizon with more perspective and opportunities. At least I would gain the ability to know whether I want to fit in the social matrix I belong to or I want to seek freedom and more freedom with all its consequences at hand. People are scared of freedom and need to be prescribed their lives from the beginning to the end of it. Thus many end up being more food for the already existent system they were born in and that, somehow evolves, although so slowly.
I would choose freedom, knowing very much its risks. Depending on the age, traveling it's just boosting your mind, heart and will to better know what do you want and hope fro yourself, people and life. I am not sure that this the answer you were looking for. My 2 cents, anyway 
After 1 or 2 years of work, I would take a few months traveling cheaply across China. The idea is to meet a like-minded girl, who's out of the Matrix and not willing to trade personality for safety. (Note: It's how I got to know my wife)
Then, together, we would work in a 3rd or 4th city, to have a low rent and to avoid being bothered by nosy relatives. We would try to move abroad, without deluding ourselves about our chances. If we reach our 30's without making a progress, we just settle down in a quiet but nice backwater, and do our best to have happy kids. Maybe doing some politically harmless community efforts.
If you live in the Matrix, you try to protect yourself from depression and worst. You try to find others like you. If you can't escape the Matrix, you make you comfortable. If you have courage, more than most people, you try to change things a bit. But it takes more courage than most. In a France, during the WW2, only 2% of the population had the courage to be involved in Resistance, even counting those who were just printing leaflets. I believe many of us are in Asia because we felt like escaping something... Can we call it the Matrix ?
Because I'm "out of the Matrix", I am aware of how the matrix works (ie, my society). So, I find ways to get beyond the matrix.
The obvious would be, before I finished university, get my plan to study abroad - NZ is a good place. Study hard in the right field, do very well, score a scholarship to a NZ university, stay there for a couple of years, get my RP and a job, get citizenship - make bigger choices.
This is what I'm encouraging my ex-gf to do... she's started down that path already, and hopefully, will be in NZ within about 2 years!
