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Governor

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Q: Mainland girl uses public pressure to force guy to marry her. What would you do if you were him?

Location: Xiamen, subway station. Girl even has engagement ring ready. Look at guy's facial expression though, anything but happy. The crowd got bigger and bigger, cheering at the girl for her 'strength and guts', her ruthlessness was a 'virtue' in PRC. It paid off, the guy yielded. Look at his face, though......anything but happy. She won face, plenty.

 

http://a.mp.uc.cn/article.html?uc_param_str=frdnsnpfvecpntnwprdssskt&cli...

 

What would you do if you were the guy?

6 days 9 hours ago in  Culture - China

 
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Minor Official

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i predict years of wedded bliss - should the couple live in different cities.

earthizen:

lol....rolling on the floor. Shoud they live under one roof I predict nth extra-marital affairs. Actually this kind of so-called marriage is probably one main reason for so many mistresses, er-nai (2 nd), xiao san (3rd)....just wait till the guy has a little money, time bomb is already on in that subway station. Oh, don't ever think it would be just the guys, women do it all the same. It is just that they are far more careful, and guys are far too confident with their wife's loyalty so the wives don't get caught.

3 days 16 hours ago
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3 days 21 hours ago
 
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It's hard to say with out more information.
1 her bust size?
2 does her father own a brewery ?
3 does she have money?

RandomGuy:

1) looks like chinA-cup

2) craft beer please.

3) he's got money.

6 days 4 hours ago
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earthizen:

LOL. Well played, guys. Photo #2 gives you a glimpse to the answer to question 1.

6 days 3 hours ago
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6 days 6 hours ago
 
Posts: 780

Governor

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They are both solid 4/10, the lord is pleased.

earthizen:

Spot on. They are polar opposities, the girl obviously is the offensive, aggressive type, only cares about what she wants, me-cult, no consideration for the guy's feeling. The guy is the exact opposite. If he goes through with it, and have a kid (which is probably one of the THINGS she is after, he walks right into hell.

 

I know because one Beijing guy told me this, exact same scenario, although probably the proposal was less dramatic (for the girl), or traumatic (for the guy). Their son was 5 years old, cute. Typical middle class family, university educated he was, his pretty wife apparently wasn't. He said (his wife and kid walking behind), 'if it wasn't for the son I would have long gotten a divorce'. She looked pretty happy though.

6 days 2 hours ago
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6 days 4 hours ago
 
Posts: 2140

Shifu

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I never understood before why those public proposals are so popular, now maybe this explains it. It makes it harder to say no.

 

If you do say no though.... whoa, there's some public humiliation for the proposer.

 

 

earthizen:

Spot on. The cultural revolution of PRC never stopped, in a sense. Use of public humiliation, verbal attacks, poor's jealousy and resentment against the rich, not just financially, but all aspects such as more knowledgeable. You want face? I humuliate you in public. You want money? I do my best to stop you from closing any deal. A thieves den, dog eat dog.

6 days 2 hours ago
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RandomGuy:

Mainland Chinese culture is one that inevitably leads to insanity. The typical behavioral pattern, beliefs, habits of Chinese people are signs of an unsound mind. There is something truly wrong with the way people here behave towards each others and Foreigners alike. The constant judging, unnecessarily loud noise, public pressure, d*ck waving contest and overall stupidity mean that anyone will eventually turn insane if spending enough time among Chinese. Public pressure and judgement is one of many aspects in a deeply antisocial culture that spends more time judging others than looking at itself in the mirror. And no blame for that because many Chinese, especially the men, are ugly af yet act as if they were the real shit, their insecurity is laughable but the mental harassment they put Foreigners through out of envy and frustration is not, there are real consequences to this for any laowai who spends enough time in China.

5 days 5 hours ago
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6 days 3 hours ago
 
Posts: 2739

Emperor

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haha,, thx for my good laff for the day,,,, seeing the look on that guy's face really cracked me up wink  

 the guy looks like he was just told he has testicular cancer ~

Stiggs:

Haha he's probably hoping that dull ache in his left nut actually is cancer now instead of just tight Y fronts like he'd been telling himself before.

 

The poor bastard - actually both of them but she doesn't know it yet, she's just relieved she'll be married before she's 28 and the family won't lose face - is staring down the barrel of a long miserable marriage.

6 days 2 hours ago
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earthizen:

LOL.....rolling on the floor.

6 days 2 hours ago
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philbravery:

The modern day version of a shotgun wedding.

5 days 10 hours ago
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6 days 3 hours ago
 
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You know - it's possible that the look on his face comes from how this happened - not that she's proposing. Maybe after they get back home, he'll be all happy as Larry...

 

However, - I get the point. But I see it as pretty damn similar to Chinese marriage culture in general - the pressure to be married by a certain age.. how is it really any different?

 

How would I respond? It would depend entirely on the girl, and my feelings for her. And, even if I did save her face by saying yes in front of everyone, that doesn't mean we'll actually go through with it 3 months later! So, for me, it might be "thanks hon, but we've discussed this before - not going to happen. Just be glad I didn't humiliate you in front of all those people. Goodbye!"

Shining_brow:

Of course - the above assumes she's not a psycho stalker ex- who's just tried to pull a stunt to get me back....(happens in China).

 

If so, she'd probably suicide not long after, and I wouldn't give a toss.

6 days 1 hour ago
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6 days 1 hour ago
 
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Public pressure only works on the spineless

5 days 10 hours ago
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Englteachted:

Yeah there's no doubt he's really  into marrying her. Shining, bring me some pixie dust if you ever make it back from Neverland

5 days 10 hours ago
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Shining_brow:

Do you not understand the meaning of the word 'possible'? Hint: it's in dictionaries... go look.

5 days 36 min ago
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Shining_brow:

And yes - I agree about public pressure only working on the spineless.

 

Same with automatically agreeing with the crowd without bothering to look at other possibilities...

5 days 35 min ago
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Englteachted:

Look at his hand, he doesn't want to embrace her

4 days 20 hours ago
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5 days 11 hours ago
 
Posts: 38

Minor Official

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Why the sentence 'her ruthlessness was a 'virtue' in PRC', did someone say this in the comments or did you just make it up?

icnif77:

OP is instigating poster's negative comments toward China with this BS.

 

 

5 days 1 hour ago
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earthizen:

@gardener Apparently you don't understand the word 'context' as you won't ask this ignorant question.

5 days 58 min ago
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earthizen:

Ahhh, the wolf under the sheep's skin shows its claws after being exposed. One closet communist hiding in china with nowhere else to run is getting psychotic, throwing gibberish and hurling insults!

5 days 49 min ago
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5 days 3 hours ago
 
Posts: 197

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i predict years of wedded bliss - should the couple live in different cities.

earthizen:

lol....rolling on the floor. Shoud they live under one roof I predict nth extra-marital affairs. Actually this kind of so-called marriage is probably one main reason for so many mistresses, er-nai (2 nd), xiao san (3rd)....just wait till the guy has a little money, time bomb is already on in that subway station. Oh, don't ever think it would be just the guys, women do it all the same. It is just that they are far more careful, and guys are far too confident with their wife's loyalty so the wives don't get caught.

3 days 16 hours ago
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3 days 21 hours ago
 
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Answer of the DayMORE >>
A: That would be an awful experience. I would call your embassy asap
A:That would be an awful experience. I would call your embassy asap, they might be able to suggest something or give you a temporary replacement or something. I'm sure they would have seen this before.You may also need something from the PSB to say that you still have a valid visa in order to leave the country. Do you at least have a copy of your visa and passport front page, or can you get one?  If you have been working here your employer would probably have copies. In the mean time, turn the place upside down trying to find your passport.Good luck mate.   -- Stiggs