By continuing you agree to eChinacities's Privacy Policy .
Sign up with Google
Sign up with Facebook
Q: Should We Leave China to the Chinese?
For the first little while, it was a hilarious and ridiculous place, an adventure... but after spending a few years here, learning the language, and really grasping what China is as its core, I don't even want to leave the apartment anymore. At one point, I had plans to set up long-term business goals in this country, but now I laugh at the idea. I was so naive!
I have a great job, a lovely lady, and a good group of friends (foreign and "westernized" Chinese). My life is not lacking socially or financially. It is the environment that is killing me. I have started to HATE this place, and that's not a word I use lightly.
I am constantly disgusted by what I hear and see. It's grey, grey and more grey. The locals are, for the most part, ignorant, racist, fucks. While I've met hundreds of absolutely lovely Chinese people, I am harassed by human garbage on a daily basis. Almost every time I go out with my wife I find myself in some kind of altercation with a group of dead-eyed, black-toothed assholes who think they can comment freely on our cross-cultural relationship without getting a response just because I'm a foreigner. Well, they are mistaken, I will stick up for myself and my family by an means necessary--abroad or at home--if you disrespect my wife, you will get your rotten teeth knocked out. I will not take any shit from these fucking NONGS.
Last week a woman in Beijing was stabbed to death in broad daylight by a man with a goddamn SWORD. Why? She was with her white husband. The attacker said "I hate Americans"... when the man replied that he was French, he stabbed the woman in the chest anyway. They were newlyweds. This is not the modern world as we know it... we can't forget that this is still a developing country with third-world values.
The food is gross and will give you food poisoning half the time. Being sick to your stomach at least once a week is not normal. They always talk about how much better Chinese food is than all the other food in the world combined... what a load of shit. I like a few dishes... the xiazi, hotpot, etc, but come on, it's all generally all the same fried dish. Better than French, Mexican, Thai, Indian food? I think NOT.
There is no music or art scene, or anything "cultural" of any kind. The locals spend their nights in KTV, trying to convince themselves they are living worthwhile lives. I've spent a few nights with Chinese friends or coworkers in those places and, my god, what a load of bullshit. Let's eat some fruit and drink weak piss-beer and sing the worst songs ever, sound like dying cats and argue for an hour over who gets the bill. FUUUUUUUUUUUUN.
All the wildlife is long dead. Even the spiders have left the cities. People see animals as food and nothing more. Did you see the story about the British guy whose dog was beaten to death by the chengguan? He didn't have the proper registration papers for his poor gentle one-eyed pooch, so these scumbags said "foreign cunt" and smashed the dog's head with a baton, threw the body in a bag and left. These people have been abused and kicked to the dirt so long that they have lost their sense of compassion. Who could look be so heartless as to torture and butcher a friendly domestic dog for meat? I've seen photos of those vendors at the dog meat festival, they're proudly smiling as they torture those confused pups! This is NOT a cultural thing. They are simply not self-aware human beings. They are suffering from a disease of the soul.
Everything here is fake garbage. The girls are pretty, but also boring as hell or absolutely full of shit. What did you do on the weekend? "Watched TV, surfed the internet, shopping." I meet my friends for beers on saturday nights, shoot the shit, then go home. No camping trips, no live shows or music festivals, no interesting events, no backyard barbeques, no friendly football or golf games, no walks by the ocean, no swimming in lakes or photographing animals... nothing.
Does anybody else think the cons far outweigh the pros of living here? Sure, we may have nice jobs here, but IMO no amount of money is worth living in this shit-hole. I'm counting the days until my move home... I've developed a newfound appreciation for my wonderful country.
Who else is tired of being stared at and harassed by low-class morons? Who else misses fresh air and the natural world? Who else doesn't want a constant stomachache and headache? Who wants to live in a place where people are generally polite and civilized? I say we leave China to the Chinese.
I am sorry, this has turned into a disjointed rant. I needed to get it out... I'll delete it later.
Have an upvote, China is a shithole because of the people. They are quick to blame everything on the government and yeah many of the problems are a result of corruption at governmental level, but most come from the beliefs and the behaviour of the people.
I decided not to hide, I go out with my girlfriend and call out the nongs for what they are, any of them makes rude comments on our couple and I will call them out on it, my girlfriend will do the same in most cases. Idiots somehow believe that we foreigners are defenseless, they are wrong.
Before this gets "harmonized"...
I have three varieties of spiders in my apartment. I can send you some if it will brighten your day.
Nessquick:
Since my childhood I was afraid of spiders due to bad experiences. In my 9 years here I have never had spiders at home, until this very last one. I am so glad that they are here. there is still some wildlife in Shanghai 
RandomGuy:
Having one of two spiders in your home is beneficial in that they kill other more invasive insects like flies, mosquitoes, ants and even (bigger than them) cockroaches. Seriously the common smallish spiders that you find in people's homes are serial killers for other insects, but rather inoffensive to you. Other venomous spiders I would kill on sight, but my part of China doesn't have these.
Sinobear:
Oh I have the beauty of all beautiful spiders here. I wouldn't offer if I didn't have high quality, "is that thing really real?" spiders.
I have the spiders of your nightmare's worst nightmares. They're BIG and they're FAST and you can actually hear their mandibles clicking in anticipation of a good meal.
I couldn't upvote this enough. I wrote a long rant as well but what's the point. We all know why China's shit.
While i cant disagree with your rant at all, Its 100% true, you still have something to do with your poop life here ya know. People hate it and for good reason but then just sit and bitch about it while getting lazier and lazier.
There is a shitload of camping here man. Go to a sports store called decatholon. They have huge camping section. Or taobao. Want a camping trip? Plan one! Do the work. People will go. I habe a chinese friend that uses his holidays to hike through the sichuan wilderness or go.to xinjiang. People camp all the time.
I hate farmers more than anyone. I cant leave the hoise with my wife without killing farmers. So i learned. Wife goes in the car. Then straigjt to a place where we wont get pissed. Luxery malls , expat areas. CBDs are mostly safe. But i havent been shopping with my wife.for years unless it was at ole.
Im not saying its great. Not at all. No one should live like this. Im just saying there are things you can do to soften the blows.
You marry Chinese you marry China.
Unfortuate because I find a lot of foreigners marry within their first two years of being here so they're still on good terms with China but by the 4~5 year mark...
Have an upvote, China is a shithole because of the people. They are quick to blame everything on the government and yeah many of the problems are a result of corruption at governmental level, but most come from the beliefs and the behaviour of the people.
I decided not to hide, I go out with my girlfriend and call out the nongs for what they are, any of them makes rude comments on our couple and I will call them out on it, my girlfriend will do the same in most cases. Idiots somehow believe that we foreigners are defenseless, they are wrong.
I spewed a remarkably similar rant to my wife just yesterday. Eerie. You're not alone!
That was quite the rant. My wife had to bear me ranting over the same things. I can see where it comes from : been there, done that, now back in Europe for pretty much what you said (minus the food, c'mmon).
If you are stuck in China for a little while : you got to try to enjoy your life or you will be a danger to yourself and your family. For me, it was as simple as getting a ukulele. Do sport (yeah, air pollution, hum...) to vent some of the steam. Mike's idea is great, hiking will exposes you to the best that China have to offer.
Make a plan to get out and stick to it : check seriously what you might need. If you think you need some qualifications, get them. I did the IELTS, for example. If your wife/husband might not be overly convinced of the benefit of leaving China (apart from keeping your sanity), plan a trip. For me, it took a couple of trips to make my point, but I made my point understood. Be prepared to have your wife/husband ranting wherever you go : "ho noes, paying taxes", "ho noes, things are more expensive, how other people dare to have life level close to mine", etc
gregorsamsa:
I hear ya, and I'm only stuck here a few more months. This defeated attitude came suddenly, practically overnight. I used to look on the bright side of this place, convinced myself that people are just ignorant and brush it off, but now I'm finding it impossible. Maybe it has something to do with growing up and wanting to be taken seriously, or just craving anonymity when I'm out in the street doing normal human things like buying groceries etc. When I say family i mean just me and my wife, we are not having kids in this anus of the universe. thanks for your reply.
Wow! that is such an honest rant and you deserve respect for saying it like it is... I just don't leave the apartment anymore, i don't even acknowledge when Chinese strangers try to talk to me or ask questions.... I'm tired!!!
gregorsamsa:
See that's what I mean, is it worth being here? Maybe it'll be tough at first to make the move and readjust back home, but we shouldn't continue to alienate ourselves after we've decided we're not happy here. Just buy your plane ticket and flee mate
RandomGuy:
You don't have to acknowledge strangers anyway. I ignore almost everyone unless the stranger actually has this vibe that let you know he or she is more educated than most here and not some fresh out of the farm nong.
The way people approach you means a lot on who they are:
"Helloooo foreigner!" with a creepy voice -> Obvious idiot spotted, ignore and keep walking, nothing to be earned from this one.
"Hey there! How are you?" with a normal voice -> Good feeling, acknowledge and answer, you might have found a new friend.
This regardless of English or Chinese being used.
I see where your coming from man,I agree with everything you have written.I pretty much feel the same way.
Great rant, I'm visiting the states now with my wife and have reached many of the same conclusions. At this point the only benefit I see of staying in China is saving more money but doing so requires sacrificing quality of life in so many ways. I've basically given up trying to do nice things in China, anything really luxurious in China will be insanely expensive and still leave you disappointed. I work, go to the gym, eat well, hang with a few friends and save money. In America I go to beautiful clean beaches, go for walks on trails where I see no people, eat fresh seafood that won't make me sick, cross the street safely, and drive without fear of other drivers. There are also community groups, sports clubs, political groups, and I don't get singled out for being different. Why live in mainland China unless you have a really good job, want to get fluent in mandarin, or are so desperate that you really have no other options? China is a shithole with tasty but unsanitary food, horrible building construction, the worst pollution and traffic in the world, and hordes of ignorant peasants all around you. It's not a place to build a life, I'm getting out asap.
Another one bites the dust?...good rant.
Very valid points.
Add Xiao Yue Yue in Foshan to that list.....19 people walked past!!!!
I just dunno what it is about this society. The lack of empathy is major issue, where did that come from was it post 1949 or does it go back further?
My guess is further back but its been amplified by the war and the glorious joys that followed.
The lack of culture is true. Unless you have lived in China you wouldn't understand it, people think "wow....China all that culture" but it isn't really like that.
Historic sites?....mostly fake and tourist traps.
Arts?.....errr...not really....comedy, theatre?
Mass Spectator sports?....don't really do team games.
Countryside....some bright spots..but festooned with blue or pink plastic bags.
There are some scenes in 1st tier cities.....jazz, open mike nights etc. But these aren't really consumed by the masses and mainly seem to have been instigated with foreign involvement.
Generally life revolves around saving face, one up manship, plotting and scheming, petty rivalries, eating, sleeping, watching TV, surfing the intranet, KTV for singing, KTV for other reasons, buying tat that is either low quality or over priced.
But on the other hand I like China because its hectic, busy, colourful in a crass way, completely alien, surprising, repulsive and engaging all at the same time.
When you leave and go back to the west, life seems to have the sound turned down.
That's what I miss.....I miss that 1st year, the "Wow....I'm in China!" feeling....not the "Oh no, I'm in China"...that it sadly morphed into. How I wish that could be recaptured....
China cannot be left to abide on its own. It's like leaving a trash fire burning next to your home. One day the world will have to deal with the China issue - it's mainly the CCP setting the example by showing all the leadership of a robber baron. The cute yellow minions follow suit.
As much as I'd like to place all the blame on the CCP, they too are merely the result of the sentiment of China's people. The people lack confidence and shun responsibility. Attempting to hold them accountable results in angry retaliations.
The insane cruelty is the logical result of living without rights, legal recourse, or any semblance of fairness. We can't get rid of the symptoms without tackling the root cause. I guess I've become a 'subversive foreign advocate', because I believe China would do well under a period of foreign rule. It helped to civilize Japan.
Chinese abroad are well-behaved on the whole, because they adapt to the culture of local society. Foreign rule replacing the CCP thugs would set a better example, and weed out the sociopaths, who can no longer operate with impunity.
It was a nice meal.
I'll probably leave early next year after a number of years here. I've just had enough of the place.
I mostly agree with everything written above, having said that i've really enjoyed living and working here despite the drawbacks.
A big factor for me leaving (certainly not the only one) is the exasperating nature of the people. A simple bank transaction shouldn't turn into a 4 hour ordeal because nobody knows what they're doing, despite you going there every month.
Things like food safety scares and industrial accidents, that are usually caused by a combination of laziness, stupidity, greed and corruption shouldn't keep happening again and again with nothing changing.
Littering, wantonly trashing anything scenic like a park or beach doesn't need to happen, people do know it's wrong now, they just don't care about anyone but themselves so keep doing it.
It's things like this that make me think of a hopeless drunk ex friend of mine who swears to change his ways every morning, tells everyone he's joining AA etc but keeps getting shitfaced everyday and making an ass of himself. Once i realized he's never going to change there's really no reason to persevere with the friendship.
I'll leave China to the Chinese (and anyone else who wants a part of it). Good luck to them, i really hope the lives of the people here continue to improve but i'll be living around people who learn from their mistakes and don't have a victim/inferiority complex.
Haha, now i'm ranting...
gregorsamsa:
Great points, thank you. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who has reached his breaking point here.
In Beijing at Bank of China they think it's funny to make people wait for hours. I stopped using that bank years ago . Merchants Bank is much better . And you are all right , they love to trash places and be very loud when it's quiet .
you're wrong if you think there is no camping. I had a friend who went for a lot of his holidays.
gregorsamsa:
actually we once camped in ZhangJiaJie, even though it is totally not permitted. We just snuck into the jungle and waited for the park to close. It was absolutely hilarious. Monkeys stole our food.
Still... I don't wanna leave! But then again I've only been here for like almost 2 years... Dunno how I'll feel after a while
