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Posts: 2409

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Q: The time has come...

As of today, I have 2 weeks before I leave China.  I would say for good, but I know that I will be visiting it from time to time.  But for the most part, after 6 years, it is time for me to say goodbye.

 

China has certainly taught me a lot and left its mark on me in more ways than I can count.  To quote Al Pacino in Scent of a Woman, some days I wanted "to take a flamethrower to this place!"  But most days, China was just the place I lived and worked.  And on the rare great days, I truly loved being here.

 

Overall, the journey was well worth the effort, tears and beers.  I made some great friends, ate tons of amazing food, and enjoyed more eye candy then most men do in 10 lifetimes.  Thank you China for being China.  If you weren't, then there would be no challenge to living here.

 

And thank you to Mr. Cat and the people who use this site.  It has been a lifeline to me in more ways than I care to think about.  You will all probably see me online from time to time after I leave as this place is hard to walk away from.

 

Thank you all.

11 years 30 weeks ago in  General  - China

 
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Posts: 2186

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Good luck in whatever you do John, I hope everything works out as you would wish.  Keep in touch this site isn't ONLY for expats, we still have some room for exExpats!

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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God speed to you, and good luck on your new endeavors.  Just do not totally forget us, please.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
Posts: 796

Shifu

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Actually i don't know what to say.There have been several members leaving China in the past months.You are one of the most respected and helpful in this site.May you healthy and happy whatever happens and wherever you go in the future!

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Best of luck to you, Xpat.John. Your insight, helpfulness and humor have often left me wishing I could somehow breed a battalion of Xpat.John clones and unleash them on the confused hordes of laowais. Alas...

 

May your new adventures keep you happy and fulfilled.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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You have to post every now and then to tell us how things are working  out

 

Thanks for your input and thanks for showing me that it is possible to get a point across and be civilized about it (still working on that one myself)

Best of luck and my best wishes to you and your family

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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Best of luck to you wherever you go. Your posts have always been good and enjoyable to read. Did China finally get too much or did you have an offer you could not refuse. I hope all goes well.

 

 

 

 

hope all goes well.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Peasant

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i always knew how to welcome a person but i never learn how to say good bye to some one but now you are going i don't know i will see your post and your humor on this site again or not but i've to say best of luck and have a better future and make more progress in your life and be a good person and make your family happy where ever you go good luck and good bye  dear friend

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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I'm sure there will be times that you miss China. Leaving will feel weird at first, but you will get used to it.  You'll probably miss China a bit, especially some of the food. I think visiting China once in a while will be good for you. You'll be gone long enough that you'll really want to go. I hope each new trip will be enjoyable and memorable for you. And I hope that you will keep coming back here. This site won't be the same without you. We're a Q&A family, dysfunctional maybe, but we all have something in common.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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  I haven't been coming to this site for long but have become familiar, in one way or another, with many interesting, unusual, or otherwise, characters. Yours is one that I can say in all honesty that I am most glad, nay heart-warmed and truly grapefruit, to finally see the back of.

  Haha, John, sorry to see you go, man, you are without a doubt, one of the people who have made this site worth visiting.

  Happy trails.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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John,

Take care of yourself and of course your family. Your insights and observations will truly be missed here as very few of us can consistently be the voice of reason as well have you have. (Respect to Happy as well on that note) On many occasions your posts have made me think twice about this crazy, wonderful place we call China.

 

 

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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Best of luck to you John!

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Good luck to you and your family going home. You'll get good burgers and pizza but you'll miss China. I think you will feel more comfortable at home. I'm filling up on meat, steak and lobster tonight.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Cuidate John, que estes bien y que Dios te cuide a ti y a tu familia!

Xpat.John:

Gracias a mi amigo. Aprecio el sentimiento.

11 years 30 weeks ago
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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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All the best John...you will be missed here.  Your insights and experience have helped me learn soooo much and sometimes have made me laugh my ass off.  I hope you continue to pop in from time to time. 

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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best of luck in your future endeavors.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Best of fortune to you, John. I've enjoyed the insights that you've posted here. Stop back in when you get a chance. I'm sure there will be something going on! In the meantime..."Ganbei! To your health, life, and wisdom!"  wink

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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Good Luck and enjoy your next adventure if there was one/

Cheers

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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Goodluck,and keep posting,you will still have lots of  info you can share

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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Good luck  and have a good time, everywhere You go.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Thank you all for the kind comments.  Several people have asked what my next step is so here is a little back story.  Basically, the last week has been a perfect storm so to speak.

 

As you all know, I live in Wuhan where I ran an IT company and my wife worked in a pharmaceutical company.  Due to the economy, my business has not been doing so great and I was giving serious thought to shutting it down and enjoying some time off.

 

Then my wife received a job offer for her dream job in Guangzhou, which we consider our home town.  So that gave me the motivation I needed to finally shut the doors on my business and we made plans to move from Wuhan back to Guangzhou.

 

The night I closed the doors for the last time on my company, I got a phone call from a friend in San Francisco (Silicone Valley) offering me a position working for his company.  My first reaction was to say no but he eventually made the deal to good to pass up.  The only catch was that I needed to be there in 2 weeks time.

 

My wife & family will unfortunately stay behind in China because her job is too good for her to give up.  Hopefully they will join me in a few years time.  In the mean time, I am sure that they will be visiting me often and I will be doing the same for them.

 

So now, I find myself having to basically start a life in the US.  I will get off the plane early on a Sunday morning with just a suitcase.  No car, no house, nothing.  And the next day, I will need to start working.  So that Sunday is going to be a very, very busy day for me.

 

Dang, I really didn't mean to type that much, but it feels good to actually get the situation in writing.  It kind of helps clarify things, I suppose.

 

But again, thank you all for your warm wishes.  I am sure I will be stopping in every now and then to get my dose of China-isims and see how you all are coping with them.  I am really going to miss China.  For some reason, I think the US is going to bore me to tears.

 

But I will be able to finally get a decent steak, so that will help ease the pain.  haha

mArtiAn:

  You're going to leave your children? For a job? And a steak? Who's going to raise them?

11 years 30 weeks ago
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mArtiAn:

  Well shit, far be it for me to judge anyone, life is not a simple thing and relationships are rarely simple, but a child only has one childhood. Mine was with an absent father. What a fuck-up I turned out to be. My old man split thinking life was too short to spend on his responsibilities. But that's the mistake he made. It's actually not. It goes on forever. Literally. Forever. Until we get it right. Then we get time off for good behaviour; and maybe peace. Only got now to work with though. Hope you ain't playin' yourself, dude. Ain't no easy roads.

11 years 30 weeks ago
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Xpat.John:

​I understand what you are saying.  And in reality, I am actually trying to do what is best for my kids.  A man's ultimate responsibility is to provide for his family and give them the best life possible.

 

Leaving my kids and wife in China is not an easy decision at all.  But the plan is that when I am in the US, I will build a stable platform for them so that when they do join me everything is prepared and stable.

 

If I had my choice, I would stay with my kids.  I am going to miss them horribly.  But I need to provide for them and with my business closed, I need to have some way of doing that.  I too grew up without a father and I understand how difficult it is.  But I will still be in my kids lives which my father never was.  It isn't a perfect situation by any means.  But it is better to make a sacrifice now and be able to give them a good future, rather than give them a father at home in the present.

 

I would rather my kids grow up not liking me but not having to struggle with university tuition than loving me and not being able to afford a good university in the future.

 

11 years 30 weeks ago
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Jnusb416:

Um, you did read that they'd visit each other often? I'm sure he's thinking of their future, and it's understandable that his wife would also like to pursue her career. It's not like he will be absent from their lives. You guys have the right to voice your opinion, but since you don't know all the details, and we're talking about someone we chat with online, it seems a little silly to leave those kinds of comments.

11 years 30 weeks ago
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mArtiAn:

  Jnus, shhhh. This isn't a Hallmark card. John, I don't mean to spoil your goodbye, I just can't help but say what I think. All the best. Really.

11 years 30 weeks ago
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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Wow! Good luck with the big move and the big change.

 

You are a voice of reason here, and it takes a special type of person to see China with open eyes and still function well there, without becoming bitter or cynical. I hope you get to see your family very often.

 

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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Best of Luck.

I am sure it is a hard decision to make. I think being with your kids is important, but so is giving them a good future perhaps back in the States.

You don't have to have everything all rolled out at this time. Enjoy San Fran.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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best of luck John. Your questions and answers are some of the ones I look forward to reading most on this website. Wish I could share a beer with you before you leave in BJ.

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11 years 30 weeks ago
 
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