My Chinese friend's grandad recently passed away and she left Beijing for a whole month to deal with the funeral in her hometown. Meanwhile, I asked another friend what I should say to her when she comes back or whether I should send a card or something, and my friend advised me to just say or do nothing. It felt a bit weird not even saying "I'm sorry for your loss" but according to my friend, bringing it up would have just stirred up too many emotions and the last thing she would want is to cry in front of me.