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Posts: 352

Shifu

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Q: What if you found your partner chatting to nearby strangers online ?

I often use social Chinese apps to talk with people around and it happened to me to chat with few females who already in relationship.I ask them if their husbands or boyfriends know they are talking to me , they say yes, they know and then I ask if I can chat with him but this one ends with no reply.
After using such apps I can say using such chatting service is not safe and there's a little space for decent chat, you will get harassment and dirty talk from anonymous female/male with a weird profile photo and those creepy people who want to know you and never let you know them ending cursing you. 

To me if I am in a relationship and found out my partner using such services, I will not be happy.I will not avoid asking myself am I boring enough to push my partner using people nearby ?
What is the reason behind accepting harassment from strangers?

How about you ?What if you found your partner talking to strangers online ?

9 years 25 weeks ago in  Lifestyle - China

 
Answers (9)
Comments (13)
Posts: 162

Governor

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I often run into females on the street, they ask me to take photos with them even though their boyfriend/husband is with them at the time. I find that a bit disturbing, but their hubby always look interested as well. I think they are just happy the laowai can pose next to the wife, it's like they just got an international certification for the female they chose. angry

Stiggs:

I actually think it's more like having your picture taken with a zoo animal.

9 years 25 weeks ago
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dongbeiren:

Agree with Stiggs 100%, they see you as a novelty for the amusement of them and their peasant friends 

9 years 25 weeks ago
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Spiderboenz:

This has happened to me several times in Nanjing in the bar district.  Guys would try to get me to dance with their wives/fiancee/girlfriend.

9 years 25 weeks ago
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Hulk:

lmfao @ international certification for the female they chose.

9 years 23 weeks ago
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9 years 25 weeks ago
 
Posts: 162

Governor

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Double posting.-.

icnif77:

You're chatting with yourself?surprise

9 years 25 weeks ago
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ilcornalito:

Why do you comment on everything I write??? Probably we are the two most bored guys in this holiday...wink

9 years 25 weeks ago
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icnif77:

 I'm very active! In my bed with Mac…. Is that 'bored'? Yesterday I looked at your handle, and I replaced 'c' with 'h'…..O2's missing in my area.

9 years 25 weeks ago
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ilcornalito:

indecision Ok, I'm having a coffee so I'm ready for the next round. 

9 years 25 weeks ago
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9 years 25 weeks ago
 
Posts: 230

Governor

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I don't understand China enough to no what she is posting or talking about so I don't care.

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9 years 25 weeks ago
 
Posts: 928

Shifu

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Newsflash. don't talk to online strangers then, Lil' Timmy. 

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9 years 25 weeks ago
 
Posts: 22

Governor

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It depends on the nature of the conversation though, doesn't it? There's nothing wrong with shooting the breeze with a stranger to kill time, idle banter never hurt anyone.

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9 years 25 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2855

Emperor

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What chatting service are you using where you are getting harassed by women?  I have met a fair number of really decent people in China using chat services, so maybe the problem is with how you decide who to add, and when.

 

Learn from it, and adapt.   Don't add people with strange avatars, and don't add anyone between midnight and 8 am.

ilcornalito:

WeChat to get random people to follow the updates about my business.

 

MoMo and Bilin for hookups. 

 

Any others?

9 years 25 weeks ago
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9 years 25 weeks ago
 
Posts: 63

Governor

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 I think the reason why Chinese people love using it, is that we are not very sociable.Our friends and families devote too much time on their work, Mahjong or computer games. Unlike westerners, we are too shy to attend social parties.So most of the times, we are very lonely, even between couples.

Sometimes we would like to use the Nearby Strangers apps  to see people around us, and have a little glimpse of other people's life. It helps us to kill time and feel less lonely.

 But I agree that some strangers are really annoying. Ignore them, just as you have to ignore other nonsense things in China. The big population in China makes everything so unpredictable .When you are confused or upset , think about why you came to here, and all the good things happened to you in China.

 

xinyuren:

This is a good point that I never thought of before.  The majority of Chinese I have met do lack social skills, so what you say makes a lot of sense.

9 years 23 weeks ago
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Eorthisio:

Agree, I have met so many more nice people on WeChat who added me using the People Nearby function than when hitting the streets or other places in China, people here don't know how to approach strangers and yet I do everything to look friendly and open.

9 years 23 weeks ago
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9 years 23 weeks ago
 
Posts: 166

Governor

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A lot of females on there are probably actually males who make female accounts so that they can lure some guys to talk to them.

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9 years 23 weeks ago
 
Posts: 22

Governor

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I talk with strangers(men and femal) sometimes when I am bored because my bf is boring sometimes.But I did not firlt with men and always being honest to them that I am not available.

Why my boyfriend is so fucking boring?coolHe does not go to bar,he does not go to club,he does not like hanging out with foreigners in Shanghai because he think they are trash,he does not like me dress openly and sexually and I am going crazy now.But he is a good person and a good listener and usually patient with me and being nice to me.coolI am so afriad that I can not find my dreaming man if I give up my bf.So better chatting with strangers to become less bored.

BTW:Are many Americans so traditional?My boyfriend is from the countryside of America and he is only 25.

Silverstein:

When someone says "I am bored" while he/she is in a relationship , this makes me doubt his/her intentions in long term commitment.So are you looking for someone to entertain you and take you to clubs or someone to listen to you ? or are you looking to show off and tell people you have a bf and he's from "American"?. According to your comment, congrats you are suffering from "the Vicky syndrome" i.e addicting hanging around expats areas and dating exclusively Caucasians. Let the members here

tell you more about "the Vicky syndrome".

9 years 23 weeks ago
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Dream87:

Girls like show off their beauty and their sexy body,it is human nature.I just hope my boyfriend can entertain me while listen to me.You know how bored I have been suffering recently.

My boyfriend asked me why I go to bar and club if I I am not looking for sex there,it is kind of narrow minded obviously.

I am more like a city girl,come on,I can not live a life dress traditionally and not show off my body shape.I am who I am,I dress what I want to dress,I do not like a man telling me what to wear.

He went too extremely,it is not healthy for a relationship.ie:Do not try to change your partner that much if it his/her lifestyle is not bad,otherwise you are chanllaging a break-up.sad

9 years 23 weeks ago
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9 years 23 weeks ago
 
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