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Q: Why no guy came to me?

It's Friday night, a bit of bored at home. So the idea of going to the bar right in front of my apartment for hunting guy hit me.

 

So I put on my black long tight sweater dress, black short tight jacket, red highheels for looking good.

 

Then I bought myself a milk tea and started to check my mobiles. There are several nice looking foreign guys around me but just no one came to me. I wonder why?

 

I really think I was the most stylist girl in this bar tonight. I dress very well.

22 weeks 1 day ago in  General  - China

 
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Perhaps they heard about you on echinacities! 

 

You have a notorious fame, they suspect you want them to marry you, so they decided to ignore you and just check today's ecc posts to know if it was really you!

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22 weeks 13 hours ago
 
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Lots of possible reasons Vicky....

 

Maybe the nice looking foreign guys already have girlfriends and were just having a few quiet beers with their friends?

 

Maybe they were all gay...

 

Maybe they realised you were out hunting guys and avoid this type of lady? If you've dressed purposely to "hunt" a white guy they might be worried you're a passport chaser?

 

Maybe they just weren't interested in you?

 

Maybe they thought, if you were checking / playing your mobile that you wanted space for yourself?

 

You might need to reconsider how you go "hunting" for guys? Personally I'd avoid women who dress "for the kill" as they're not my style...

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22 weeks 21 hours ago
 
Posts: 2521

Shifu

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You should really avoid sitting there and playing with your phone. It makes you look unavailable and it looks like you are blocking yourself out from social interaction. 

 

I would suggest smiling and even sending over a few beers. Or at least one beer to the guy you like. This is a signal for him to leave his pack and go over and approach you. 

 

It works well with women too. It doesn't mean he will immediately leave his group to thank you, but it sends a clear signal. It opens you up to chatting, especially if you ordered him a beer was already drinking.

 

Chances are he will come to thank you personally (if he has any manners) and this would be the best time to strike up a chat. 

 

Most people are extremely intimidated to approach a group. So find a way to divide and conquer. Don't wait around for things to happen to you, make them happen! 

 

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22 weeks 21 hours ago
 
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Emperor

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Yeah, I agree with above posters. surprise 

Have a look at the porn sites about 'how women do .... That!'.

 

 'e-China-Tities' .... Whooo-W-saaa, I've never, ever (I promise!)no thought about that .

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22 weeks 20 hours ago
 
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There are several reasons I can think of that no-one came over to you apart from the fact that they may have just been enjoying a quiet drink with friends. 1. you were playing on your phone, by doing this you are putting up a barrier telling everyone else I am busy, leave me alone. 2. You say this was a bar and yet you sat there with a milk tea, to a lot of guys this says I am drinking this till some guy wants to spend money on me and buy me a real drink. Too tight to pay for yourself but willing to take the guy's money, not an attractive feature to a lot of guys. 3. Dressed to kill, this for a lot of people is a big turn-off when it is so obvious. It is just another way of saying high maintenance trouble. Go dressed nicely but do not make it so obvious. 4. Attitude, you clearly thought you were the best looking woman there, it is like a big neon sign hung around your neck saying look at me. Men pick up on that type of attitude and it spells desperate, again not attractive. 5. Self-confidence is an area you are lacking in, hence why you have to compete with every other woman to be the best looking (see point 4) and why you are always asking for advice from strangers. You were seeking a job as a sales manager but told everyone here you were not qualified for that role and then you are surprised when you do not get the job. I may be wrong but it seems to me that you come over as desperate in your attempts to land the right job and the right man. You need to tone it down. Bars are not always the best places to find romance, a one night stand maybe but it all depends on what you want. How about just going somewhere neutral like a local English corner and see the foreign guys there, just dress nicely but not OTT, strike up a conversation and you might be surprised where it leads. Many people have given you good advice on this forum over the years but all the advice in the world will not help if you just ignore it.

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22 weeks 20 hours ago
 
Posts: 407

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Perhaps they heard about you on echinacities! 

 

You have a notorious fame, they suspect you want them to marry you, so they decided to ignore you and just check today's ecc posts to know if it was really you!

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22 weeks 13 hours ago
 
Posts: 585

Governor

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What city are you in. I could be available. But I'm a poor old guy without a job.

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22 weeks 11 hours ago
 
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I would have offered you a drink too.  I like the way you talk with us here on this site. but as far as why no one came up to you, that doesn't mean they didn't want to,, guys can be nervous too,, so, if it was just your first visit, go a few more times.  dress nicely, but 99% of older guys are not going to like the 'dance-girl, bar-girl look',  that is way too clear of a sign in Asia and is best left for where it is meant to be (working-girl bars in 'nam, thai, phil, camboland....). so, dress nicely, act polite and friendly and there's a good chance u will meet a decent guy.

 Chin up !

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22 weeks 3 hours ago
 
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They simply don't want to make a baby with you for obvious reasons. Why on earth don't they use a condom

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21 weeks 6 days ago
 
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Viki, do you have NO real friends with whom you can discuss these personal problems with?

 

it seems you are posting the same 'problems' over and over and over on this site, yet you totally ignore sound advice - why is that?

is it because people here don't share your view of your life?

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21 weeks 6 days ago
 
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Common folk

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Why would you go out in order to play with your phone in the first place? Seeing someone playing with his phone I assume that he is either waiting fir somebody or doesnt understand the nature of going out, therefore isnt someone I would talk to first. People wont bite you if you begin a conversation. Nothing raises your stacks more than talking to some guys. It will draw attention to you and maybe make some people start a conv w you. You need to make the first step sometimes it really doesnt hurt. If yoy dont have the guts to talk to someone in a bar then I have no idea why are you even thinking of being w someone

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21 weeks 3 days ago
 
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Girl you so THUURRRSSTEEE....STAHPIT!

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21 weeks 17 min ago
 
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