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Q: About bill paying.
I met an American guy and I just started dating him.But when I order first dinner for us and I paid,he just stood there and said nothing nor gave me money back for his dinner fee.Second time,I ordered the dinner and I paid for us,he just asked me how much and still did not give me money back.
I then felt angry but I did not show that much.Next day he told me that he wanted to have lunch in an American pizza resturant and I told him that was too expensive for me,then he told me that he would pay.
We could not find the Pizza resturant during the lunch time and we went to a Taiwanese resturant and I told him to share the bill and he agreed.But in the resturant I felt unhappy when I was thinking of the bill things but I did not tell him the reason bothered me and I acted a bit mean to him and he told he knew what it was and did not tell me.When the time came to pay the bill after lunch,I gave him money and he refused but I insisted on giving him then he took it because I felt embassying to let him find out my concern.
Then we finallly went to the pizza resturant for dinner and he refused to take my shared money but I still insisted on giving him then he took it.I found excuse that I did not want to make a western man think I am with him just for money and green card to cover my concern,
How do you think of him?I am so worrying that he is not serious with me.He and I does not work in the same city and he took two hours train to come to see me on weekend.
What will you do if your girlfriends ordered the food for both you and her and she paid at the beginning of the date?
9 years 27 weeks ago in Relationships - China
I think the first few dates you should both pay, unless someone offers to pay. I think if you offered to pay maybe he thought you wanted to, so he wouldn't know that you didn't want to if you didn't say anything!
Wasn't Vicky born in 87? 
xunliang:
Yep. Our resident loser. Banned twice and still can't get a life.
Spiderboenz:
What exactly is a 'life' and how does one go about grtting one!
xunliang:
I would say being constantly downvoted and looked down upon by an online community, then being banned from this community twice, and still returning to ask questions about the most basic of things, does not constitute to a life.
First few dates the man must pay, after a few times you should offer but he shouldnt accept. After a while if you become close enough money should become something that iant thought about.
There are other ways you can show him you dont care about money.
If he asks you where u wanna eat, make sure to choose a cheaper place.
If hes spending money on you than pick up a gift for him to let him know you appreciate it.
Offer to cook for him if he invites you out.
Its a tough balance but especially at the very beginning, he should be paying.
Why do you need to over think this so much??? If you could just stop thinking about the money for a moment then you would realize it actually doesn't matter who pays the bill. You can let him pay the first dates, or you can pay if you feel like you want to.
I usually don't mind paying for dinner but I will hate if you ask me to take you shopping after one date or when your iphone "suddenly breaks" and you need a new one, I'm not your pimp!
Sorry, needed to vent.
Vicky, I remember you talking about a previous boyfriend who didn't have money because of his drug addiction. You mentioned that money isn't important as long as you like someone. It looks like you already know the answer in your heart.
Anybody thinks Qipao is the best dress?My new bf wants me to wear Qipao and he does not like me wear short tight naked back spanish dress :(
Spiderboenz:
No. And regardless, do you REALLY think that you should be with someone who tries to dictate what you wear?
Dream87:
I don't think I will change my dressing style for him or change myself competely for him.I think I am attractive because I am myself.
If he does not appreciate it,someone will I am sure.Plus I do think tight short naked back dress looks good on me,why not wear it sometimes?
He does not like me go to dance in bar and club,but I still go.It won't make me dirty if I like hanging out there for having fun and relax.I do not care what people do in bar and club,if they want to go there to fuck or get naked,it is their own business.I am myself.That is what I told my date,I told I won't change myself competely for him and he can leave if he can not accept.
Am I a cool girl?I think I am.
Dream87:
My date told men and women can not be real freinds.Anyone agree with him?
