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Q: Any good Covid19 jokes ?

"I used to cough to cover my farts, now I fart to cover my coughs"

1 year 43 weeks ago in  Culture - China

 
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Did you hear, Prince Charles caught Covid19 after eating an old bat.

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1 year 43 weeks ago
 
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Lucky you 'cause farting isn't embarrassment in China especially if you drink glass of warm water in the same time ... 

 

Can't fart anywhere in EU even with the well aged Martell in my hands .. 

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1 year 43 weeks ago
 
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I'm excited that the phrase 'get the feck away from me' is no longer rude but a public service announcement.

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1 year 43 weeks ago
 
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It has just been pointed out to me that Ecc has 2 sites...only people with a VPN can read my posts now....fucking sneaky Chinese again

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1 year 43 weeks ago
 
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China is in no way responsible for the pandemic.

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1 year 43 weeks ago
 
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Did you hear, Prince Charles caught Covid19 after eating an old bat.

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1 year 43 weeks ago
 
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I don't think it's responsible to joke about something so serious. Just a few hours ago I read that Eminem is the latest celebrity to be afflicted with the virus. According to the report he called his doctor when he found his palms were sweaty, knees weak and arms were heavy. Vomit on his sweater already, looks like mom's spaghetti.

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1 year 43 weeks ago
 
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  • APR 3, 2020 6:44 AM

China's 'Silicon Valley' Bans Consumption Of Cats, Dogs

"This ban also responds to the demand and spirit of human civilization,"

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    1 year 42 weeks ago
     
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    EDIT : Nevermind, stupid website isn't allowing me to post funny covid pics..

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    1 year 42 weeks ago
     
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    1 year 42 weeks ago
     
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    We all have Schrodinger;s Virus now.

     

    Because we can't get tested, we can't know if we have the virus now.

     

    we have to act like we have the virus so we don't spread it to others.

     

    we have to act like we have never had the virus, becasue if we didn't have it, we are not immune.

     

    therefore we both have and don't have the virus.

     

    Thus Schrodinger's Virus.

     

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    1 year 42 weeks ago
     
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    I got one ... c&p

     

    consistentliving 1 hour ago

    A bank robber ran into the bank when his mask falls off mid-heist.

    He makes eye contact with a hostage looking directly at him and shoots him dead. 

    He puts his mask back on and turns to face the other two hostages, a man and a woman.

    "Did either of you see my face?!" He yells.

    The man answers, "I didn't, but I think my wife might have..." 

     

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    1 year 41 weeks ago
     
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    23 weeks 4 days ago
     
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    I like my women like I like COVID.

     

    19, breathtaking and easily spread

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    23 weeks 4 days ago
     
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    I'd tell you a joke about Covid, but 99.5% of people won't get it.

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    23 weeks 4 days ago
     
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    22 weeks 5 days ago
     
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    What's the difference between being vegan and having Covid 19?

    With Covid the loss of taste is only temporary... 

     

    I thought I had Covid 19 so I decided to give it a go and I injected myself with bleach...

    Surprisingly I'm all white now. angel

     

    COVID 19 is like Pasta

    Chinese invented it, Italians spread it. 

     

    There's a whole website on Cofid jokes ... I'd say, that's must be very important virus ..

     

     

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    22 weeks 5 days ago
     
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     SocialistRA

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    21 weeks 1 day ago
     
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     Prinz Andrews, I mean premier Andrews resurfaces in Oz ... 

     

     ... both rebels, Philo & Sandnoso will be locked out of de Economy ... 

     

    Now, news for real:

     

    Sep 6, 2021 14:33Victoria, Australia will ‘LOCK OUT’ unvaccinated people from its economy

    Victoria, Australia will ‘LOCK OUT’ unvaccinated people from its economy

    The Australian state of Victoria will “lock out” unvaccinated people from participating in the economy, Premier Dan Andrews has announced.

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    20 weeks 2 days ago
     
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    It's obviously not a joke for the dude with the new condition but the name alone....  you can't help laughing and thinking that can't be real.

     

    "Restless anal syndrome". Calling your boss and saying you've got long covid and aren't sure if / when you'll be back would suck, having to announce a restless anus would be a huge 'bummer'. You'd be the 'butt' of all the office jokes for the rest of your time there.

     

    http://www.iflscience.com/health-and-medicine/man-develops-restless-anal-syndrome-following-mild-case-of-covid19/

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    15 weeks 5 days ago
     
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    This isn't a joke, butT .. it should be ... surprise

     

     Australian cops slammed for checking man’s beverage to verify his excuse for not wearing Covid-19 mask

    ‘Coffee cup Gestapo’: Australian cops slammed for checking man’s beverage to verify his excuse for not wearing Covid-19 mask

    Video footage of Melbourne police checking whether a man’s coffee cup was empty to verify his excuse for not wearing a mask is stirring the latest round of online outrage over Australia’s dystopian Covid-19 policies.                    

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    14 weeks 3 days ago
     
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    Lol, need a tube down your throat to breathe? Tired of hospital food? Not to worry, there's another miracle cure for the covid....

     

    All you need to do is drink a glass of your own pi$$

     

    http://www.newshub.co.nz/home/world/2022/01/coronavirus-us-anti-vaxx-leader-christopher-key-urges-followers-to-drink-their-own-urine-to-cure-covid.html

     

    It's just as well you've probably already lost your sense of taste and smell... 

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    2 weeks 1 day ago
     
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    covid vaccines work. that is the best joke.????

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    1 week 4 days ago
     
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    https://www.medrxiv.org/content/10.1101/2021.12.23.21268276v1.full.pdf

    Large British Study Finds Risk of Myocarditis Doubles After Each mRNA Jab

    The study was published last month, and it analyzed data from over 42 million people 13 and older who have taken a COVID-19 shot. It was conducted by various researchers from institutions at the University of Oxford, University of Leicester, University of Edinburgh, King’s College London and University of Nottingham.

    The findings showed that myocarditis risk doubled after one jab, doubled again after a second jab and doubled yet again after a third booster jab.

    “An association between COVID-19 infection and myocarditis was observed in all ages for both sexes but was substantially higher in those older than 40 years,” the study’s abstract states. “These findings have important implications for public health and vaccination policy.”

    The American Heart Association has released similar studies finding that the overwhelming majority of younger Americans developing myocarditis were injected with an experimental mRNA jab within a month of developing the condition as well as a study finding that “most patients” are at higher risk of heart-related medical issues after an mRNA shot.

     

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    1 week 2 days ago
     
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    Did you hear the one about the f***nuts who died of covid after making a joke about it? Real riot. I heard he suffered a real slow, painful death. 

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    1 week 2 days ago
     
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    last summer there were very few kids who caught covid. Many allready had pre existing problems. Then the gov't started vaccinating the kids. Suddenly there were thousand of kids in the hospital with covid and heart problems

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    1 week 2 days ago
     
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    A:I'd say no, you don't need working permit to work for Chinese Co. remotely, i.e. by not residing in China.Best advice on that you'll get from your employer. https://www.china-briefing.com/news/china-foreigners-work-permit-application-and-renewal-recent-changes/ See this part: However, because a valid resident permit is one of the primary requirements for the renewal of a work permit, without a valid residence permit, expatriates stranded outside China may not be able to renew their work permits anymore. ... or in other words, if you don't reside in China, work permit is also not required. Some more details about Work visa requirements .. https://www.hongdaservice.com/blog/china-work-visa-requirements-what-you-may-not-know -- icnif77