Mr Poutine - I have come up with a great solution I think you, your Chinese girlfriend (what's her name by the way? We've heard so much about her - I feel like I know her already - yet do not know her name) and Baylee-Ann will simply love!

You have to administer your usual bottle-of-red-wine before she goes to bed. This will keep her fruity during the evening, and she will forgive any misgivings that occur during the night.

BUT! In the morning you need to wake her with a kiss and a morning cocktail! There are loads of suitable 'morning cocktails' to choose from; ones which are ok to drink before noon. (sometimes if people see you drinking whiskey out of a brown paper bag before noon they will stare oppressively)

Ludovico's personal favourites are the Corpse Reviver No.2 and the Ramos Gin Fizz - a funky little babies that will have her sozzled in no time at all! (beware though, don't give her more than 4 Corpse Revivers or she will turn into an actual corpse!)

You must give these to her as soon as she wakes up otherwise she'll be suspicious. And trust me she will love them - I've yet to meet a Chinese who doesn't love a good cocktail! The failsafe option is a Bloody Mary: classic, sophisticated, and savoury - No Chinese can resist!!

I suggest at midday she turns to whiskey and ginger, or gin and tonics, for longevity and stamina.

Good luck Poutine, let us know what japes you get up to with Baylee-Ann and Ms China DuFion!

Njord and Ludovico, you guys have really brilliant ideas and are of great halp! Thank you very much! Back in Montana, 'Merica, we have that saying that says "if it doesn't taste like alcohol, then it's not alcohol". If I can make good cocktail that doesn't taste alcohol, then the problem is settled! Now that I think about it, I remember back in my trailer park, there was this guy that would mix drinks and give it to girls until they got drunk then had his fun with them. It was his hobby and everybody thought it was funny. It was a challenge for the girls to drink moar and moar and resist Richard, but he always found his way to win, except with Baylee-Ann. He tried once, I remember she faked being drunk and when he made his move he received a mega kick in his crotch. He must have forgotten Baylee-Ann was named the Nutcracker!

But I don't have to worry about my Chinese girlfriend, because Xiao Hong is not Baylee-Ann!

Silly me for not having though of that before! She will keep drinking her bottle of red wine a day, but I'll make her cocktails so she doesn't know it's alcohol! That way she will not think she drinks too much, and that will save me yet another argument!

Thank you a lot for the halp, Ludovico and Njord!

Is Baylee-Ann your pet animal?

No no no sunilsah, Baylee-Ann is a very good friend of mine back in Montana, 'Merica. She's moar of a friend, she's like a sister to me. We would always be laughing together and she would always give me pecks on the torso.

We had the habits of sleeping in the same bed, but don't worry, she is not my mistress, I love my Chinese girlfriend too much! I'm just not sure if my Chinese girlfriend would understand, so I was worried if she would be comprehensive if Baylee-Ann would sleep in the same bed as us. Plus, it's going to be way funnier than if she went to a hotel!

You should explain situation calmly to ur GF. But sleeping in same bed is bad, bcause it shows no respect to ur gf. Hotel is not expensive, ur friend can pay it! traditional chinese girl dont want to share bed with other woman and bf!

Poutine, I agree with Ludovico.

I would not give your girlfriend red wine that early in the morning. But I don't think cocktails are strong enough. As soon as your girlfriend wakes up with a raging headache, tell her you've got medicine for her. Proceed to make her swallow a few shots of vodka or baijiu.

The only thing she'll remember before lapsing into a second coma is how nice you were when she didn't feel well.

On a more serious note, Poutine, I'm concerned for you, your mental health. Not your girlfriend, though, she's an alcoholic.

The quick and easy answer would be no. From my experience Chinese girls are very possessive. Even what appears to be a perfectly platonic relationship with a friend (who happens to be female) will immediately incur her jealous wrath.

you in serious trouble with a capital T.

your best bet get your friend a hotel. 

otherwise get ready for ww3

I dont know what girlfriend would be ok with sleeping in the bed with another girl who is non familial, let alone let her wake you up with kisses on the chest. Either she is your mistress or not. If not you can sleep on the couch and let the ladies have the bed.

I think you'll find this (two year old) thread is just some guy looking for attention, not a serious question.