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Q: Bosses guilting employees into staying?
My Chinese boss says I'm selfish because I want to leave this job...I've already explained why, that I'm having a nervous breakdown and that I feel I will start to damage the school's image. It seems that any normal person, if a man who works with young children walks into the office and says to the boss...
"I feel like punting a small child like a football and going on three day vodka benders, can I resign with no benefits, and I'll work 3 days for free..."
-A normal boss would believe the man. In a few months I've pretty much seen all my plans of the last year go to hell, my family continues to explode, and the US has unemployment of 16-22% if you include the under-employed. I got an offer for a nice university in the NorthEast, and want to stop teaching little kids.
-They are a company. They didn't even pay for my airplane ticket, so why are they acting like I cost them money or something? I've done unpaid overtime with them already...I had to sing on a stage, I've had 10 hour days of split-shifts to far to go home. It's not a great job...sorry. Don't call me selfish, you are used to exploiting people you silly.
Some Chinese bosses will use every tactic from guilt to threats to keep employees from quitting. Turnover in employees looks bad for them and can affect their bonuses. In the end, it has nothing to do with you, but everything to do with the money that goes in their pocket.
Now... If you did actually punt a kid then he would be able to fire you and still have his bonus intact because he got rid of you and not the other way around. If you want him to fire you, without punting a kid, you could always just walk up to him and give him a huge wet kiss and tell him that you love him. That will get you fired (or beaten) faster than you can pull your tongue from his mouth.
hey might bight it off if he pulls that on him, don't French strange men.
Don't listen to them, they just don't want to lose the money you'll make them. I was surprised my job didn't try to convince me to stay, although I had many students tell me that they would miss me. I think the college knew that every expat leaves after just one year there, and there wasn't any way to convince me stay another year. The expat from two years ago told me they tried to get him to stay by promising a big banquet, but he'd already bought his ticket and he left early. I didn't even get a banquet or goodbye dinner or anything, not like I really care. They were late in paying me yet again, only a week before I left. Even if I had decided to stay in Lishui for another year, I would have probably gotten a job at the other college; I heard they pay more. Overall, I know it probably wasn't that bad an experience compared to other people, but not good enough to stay. Mostly I just get a little sad when I look at pictures of friends.
Sounds to me like you have nothing to lose so just pick a date, tell your "so called" boss and bon voyage. Don't fall into the trap of believing the garbage that they will undoubtedly spew in your direction. It's not worth the hassle......get out of there.
Book your ticket, make your plans, and tell your (former) boss to "go pound sand." While he is trying to figure out what you said, exit, stage left.
"Bosses guilting employees into staying?" First of all, I think that you meant "How do I deal with my boss trying to make me feel guilty?" Second, ignore what your boss said. If you are not happy with your job..quit. Voila! Problem solved. * giadrosich, well said! 
