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Q: Can you tell me if that is true?

Currently I am staying in an international youth hostel,my British roomate told me that in west,people usually have sexy to see if they are compatitable with each other before  step into a seriously relationship to be each other's boyfriend and girlfriend.Is that true?

7 years 6 weeks ago in  Relationships - China

 
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no

,did you fall for this?

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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Some do some don't. Some people have sex purely for recreational purposes. However, it is fairly common in Britain for young people who have been dating for a while to also have a sexual relationship, whether or not they view the relationship as being long-term.

Some people, of course, take this further and co-habit for a while before marriage.

So long as both parties are in agreement, what is the problem?

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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Hard to say, it seems ridiculous from both angles. I think most people consider a relationship official once the wick has been dipped, but some may take it slower, but I'd never know because no man would ever admit that to a buddy. 

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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It's true. Quite a lot of people in the west do that. I wouldn't, however, base a relationship on sex. Once the sex dries up, what do you have left? Love is a more powerful thing than sex ever will be. No amount of mind-blowing sex will ever hold a candle to love.

 

It's definitely true that a lot of people aren't sexually satisfied, but I think that's a sad thing to base a relationship on. If someone isn't good at sex, they can learn. A couple should learn these things and explore together.

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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It depends on the people.  If I had a daughter, I would recommend that she find out if the guy and her are sexually compatible before getting very serious.

 

Just think what would happen if you married a guy, then had sex and found out that your really, really liked it and wanted a lot of it and he only wanted to do it once or twice a year, if that often.  Or, he wanted something unusual (like bondage) and you didn't want to do anything like that.

 

The result would be that one or both of you would be very unhappy about a large part of your relationship.  It could cause people to cheat or cause a breakup or divorce.

 

So, in my mind, it is better to find out early rather than later.

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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Yes and no.

He could be trying to take advantage of you or he could be serious...(if a foreign man said this to you).

I would never get serious myself with a woman anywhere unless the sexual chemistry clicked.  

I will never understand why local men here seem to prefer inexperience.  While it is temping to delve into those issues I will recluse myself from even attempting right now.

In conclusion yes...sex is important...but so are many other things as well.

 

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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If a relationship has a crap sex life, somebody is more likely to cheat.

 

It makes sense and it is fairly common in countries like the UK which is open about sex.

 

And your actually far more likely to get teased if you are with a girl and are not having sex with her.

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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if a relationship is just based on sex it wont last long, unless you are sex budies lol, in the other hand if you make a guy wait and he actualy waits until you are ready, then perhaps he does like you and isnt only looking for sex

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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He is trying to use you. Most go on a few dates before sex. If he wants sex first he will forget you 30 seconds after the sex is finished. Or continue to "try" you until you understand he just wants easy sex.

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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HA HA this question just proof how naive You are and how little you know of the western culture.

"In western we have sex before deciding to be together OMG, how is your IQ again?"

 

This is what happens, he will have sex with you, then next day he will try again , again and again, that is call freesbie girl ( he f*cks you till he is satisfied, then he leaves, your feelings is not important, in his eyes you are only a toy).

 

Remember western people mostly go to asia to find a naive girl to play with, those that are normal will not ask such question.

Do you really believe a relationship will last forever with a man with such attitude? Sooner or later you will divorce, he is just out for flesh hunting. Tell him to buy a hooker instead.

 

  Also the statistic are saying many western man goes especielly to thailand and have sex with 6 years old boys and girls.  Don´t belive me? Google it ( use vpn if you can´t access Google)

 

Jesus some girls really are living in a cave!

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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  No, it's crap. People have sex when they want to and they don't when they don't. If you want it, have it. If you don't. Don't.

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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Rubbish.  He just wants to sleep with you.  

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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Use common sense here.

 

First off, yes, in western countries, sex before marriage is common. It can range from one-night stands, casual sex buddies, dating relationships, and serious relationships.What's important to realize here though is that BOTH parties normally (not ALWAYS) know what is going on with them. ONSs and casual happen all the time, with both parties having a mutual understanding.  It can get more complicated with dating and serious, depending on the people.  It's a lot of complex crap that I don't feel like explaining, but basically, sometimes one person is way more into the other, and it can be uncomfortable for both parties, yet they continue to hook up.

 

Anyway, back to the main part of the question:

 

You said "YOUTH HOSTEL". A place where transient people stay before leaving to go somewhere else cheaply.  By definition, people don't "settle down" while staying at one of those. I highly doubt that would be a place for a serious relationship to spring up.

 

On the other hand, if YOU want to have sexy with a guy and can deal with the idea it's just casual or a ONS, by all means, have fun, but be safe.  Have the guy wear a condom.

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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Don't believe that.

A relationship shouldn't have sex as a basis. That's going to be one fragile relationship and I think it would most likely not work out.

 

 

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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We already know when we are sexually attracted to another. It's really quite obvious before you are naked. 

        This person is interested in having sex with you (or their friend). 

Don't accept this.

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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Consider this: "Women use sex for love. Men use love for sex." Not all, of course, but a good many do.

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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I would say that in a lot of relationships, people do not have sex before deciding to be serious as boyfriend and girlfriend. Many times they will start dating before having sex. How long they date before having sex depends on the the couple. Some people don't have sex until after they are married. Some people have sex but never have a relationship together. It depends on what each person wants, and what makes them happy.

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7 years 6 weeks ago
 
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