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Q: The dangers of loneliness faced by so many Chinese men?
According to NGOs, between 15 and 20 millions (CCP says 12 millions) Chinese girls were never born or killed at birth since 1980, double these numbers (roughly) to know how many men out here have no hope to ever find a life partner.
They are considered the biggest threat to China's future and stability by its leadership, 30 to 40 millions lonely men, angry men between 16 and 35, unable to fulfill their fundamental biological needs.
Wealthy men having 5 or 10 young mistresses doesn't help the situation as well.
Add to that the ever increasing number of Chinese ladies finding out they like girls, and you have an explosive situation.
We can assume without any doubt that the recent stabbing in Beijing and most other attacks on Foreign men or their Chinese partners are mostly motivated by the desperation of these Chinese men.
What do you think the long term consequences will be? More attacks on Foreigners? Increased rape cases? More social unrest?
Should we constantly fear for our life and that of our partner in this environment?
Long term consequences? I've read that gender inbalance can be a recipe for social disaster in any society. When you have a huge number of young,pissed off, frustrated guys it doesn't take much to set them off (social injustice, unemployment) and before you know it you have some sort of revolution on your hands.
What I don't understand is all these guys who are pampered mummies boys with no social skills or real job prospects - the type of guy who is never going to be a success with the ladies - making a big thing about 'leftover women' not being an option.
28 is not old, especially now we're living in modern times, and let's face it, beggers can't be choosers.
RandomGuy:
Haha yeah, I used to work with this guy in his early 30s, I suspect he is a virgin, so so slightly below average looking by Chinese standards, (not the cool type of) nerd, skinny with no muscles mass, has very specific requirements for girls (cute face, below 25, tall but not taller than him, nose type, ...), won't even consider outside these requirements, seems to hate his life. I told him to loosen up his requirements but he won't listen, I introduced him to some very nice looking single female friends of mine and he screwed up everything, well his problem.
self defense and fighting skills are not taught in china, be aware of your surroundings, 360 degree view at all times, no alleys, no nightclubs, and most important, throw the first punch and deny, deny later. if you need additional protection, a murse man purse, with a tazer and a flare gun is enough for the 2 legged creatured they call men in china.
expatlife26:
i want to see the headline "Hero foreigner stops terror attack with flare gun and air horn"
OR
"Villain foreigner with flare gun and air horn accepts surrender of Shanghai garrison"
either way maritime emergency kit = formidable
ambivalentmace:
sadly thats about all you can legally carry as a foreigner to defend yourself here. i'm quite surprised that i was allowed to buy a tazer gun.
I've seen Chinese men fight. I'm not so worried. To think that when I was a teenager I thought all Chinese men were like Bruce Lee. The fights I've seen between men in China were nothing short of laughable. The first one that I saw I had to ask my Chinese friend what was happening. He told me that the two men were fighting. I found it hard to equate with what I believed a fist fight should look like.
SaifMalik:
Personally I've seen pretty brutal fights amongst Chinese men, one involved smashing one of the guys head on the ground several times until he started bleeding. I guess it just depends on the individual.
Lord_hanson:
Who says they would use their fists. A knife is dangerous in anyones hands.
expatlife26:
I agree with lord hanson & saif.
Don't be complacent just because you're more formidable in a fist fight.
Skinny guy with a swiss army knife can kill a bodybuilder if he catches him off guard.
what scares me in seeing fights here it's always a group ganging up on one guy, and they don't stop when the opponent is clearly done. I think theres a good bit of bottled up rage here, when they get an outlet for it they go all in
Long term consequences? I've read that gender inbalance can be a recipe for social disaster in any society. When you have a huge number of young,pissed off, frustrated guys it doesn't take much to set them off (social injustice, unemployment) and before you know it you have some sort of revolution on your hands.
What I don't understand is all these guys who are pampered mummies boys with no social skills or real job prospects - the type of guy who is never going to be a success with the ladies - making a big thing about 'leftover women' not being an option.
28 is not old, especially now we're living in modern times, and let's face it, beggers can't be choosers.
RandomGuy:
Haha yeah, I used to work with this guy in his early 30s, I suspect he is a virgin, so so slightly below average looking by Chinese standards, (not the cool type of) nerd, skinny with no muscles mass, has very specific requirements for girls (cute face, below 25, tall but not taller than him, nose type, ...), won't even consider outside these requirements, seems to hate his life. I told him to loosen up his requirements but he won't listen, I introduced him to some very nice looking single female friends of mine and he screwed up everything, well his problem.
China solves problems in two ways: ignore/deny the problem, and starve/kill people. I have no doubt this problem will have the same solution. The gender imbalance was caused by deaths, and can only be solved by more deaths.
But unlike the CCP's normal attitude of ignoring problems, the state media does discuss this problem somewhat openly. I'm all for ignoring/denying it: who cares if 20-40 million assholes can't get an under-26 good-looking parasite to leech off them? No problem if you ask me. I have a great name for a Beijing Gay Bar: "Hey Assholes".
RandomGuy:
I don't think these guys are gay or they wouldn't be pissed because they can't find a girlfriend.
coineineagh:
Give it time. Chinese citizenship is like a prison sentence. They choose partners by what provides face for their family - a rich gay boyfriend will provide face too.
The sound of 45 million men fapping. A scary thought. Although perhaps a new form of renewable energy? Always a silver lining.
iWolf:
You really are a glass half full kind of guy.
This is genius and could also stop global warming and solve world hunger (eww).
nzteacher80:
I can remember being 13. I could've powered a city block.
I agree 100% with some of the comments eortisio has made.
The problem in China is total non compliance with the 8 out of ten rule. Take ten couples, seperate them. and ask them to rate photos of people of the opposite sex from one to 10.
One goes with one, two goes with two and so on.
The problem here is that the strange people go unmarried. The strange people remain un-marriied rather than marry another strange person. Because everyone want's a perfect partner. So the girls who are a little bit less than perfect (maybe has a big bum) go off and become a low value mistress to be abused.
I blame the matriachial society.
expatlife26:
yeah you know that's a really good point i'd been trying to put my finger on for a while.
the problem is worse than it needs to be because everybody will hold out for a perfect mate that doesn't exist for them. It's like you'd lose more face by marrying an overweight or dark skinned girl (or vice versa) than by dying alone.
expatlife26:
btw, what do you mean by saying you blame the matriarchal society?
I'm not trying to be obstinate or anything at all i'm really curious where you're going with that
RandomGuy:
I think he meant that China is in fact a society strongly modeled on women's needs. There are signs confirming his thoughts.
Think about it you know, let's forget the "we are better than animals" thingy for a moment. Physiologically speaking, in most species including humans, men and women have different yet complementary goals in life. For the males, passing on our seed, if possible with as many females we can, as to ensure our genes to go on. For the females, seducing the dominant male to secure a safe environment where they can raise their kids up to adulthood.
Males are typically much less into security and stability than females for this obvious reason. The pushes for marriage and divorce laws through history were almost always made by women, as to ensure their own "security". Nothing wrong with this, if it wasn't for it and cheating was not seen as a shameful act, how many men would remain loyal? Probably very few.
In China, the obsession with buying an apartment, with security and creating a safe haven for the family insulated from the outside world is modeled on female needs. My bet is if it wasn't for women most Chinese would not buy apartments at all. Also most men need very little money to live well. In the US, 87% of the consumer spending is made by women who represent roughly half of the population. Chances are there would be no gold rush in China right now if it wasn't for women, because men can enjoy life with the bare minimum, while women want security and stability, more money means more security in a capitalistic society.
And don't misunderstand me, I rather choose a society modeled on women's needs than men's needs, I'm not the war type of guy, attacking rival countries/cities/villages and raping their women to pass on my seed? Not my ideal.
expatlife26:
Great answer eorthosio.
I would definitely agree that china is not a macho culture at all. That people's motivation is to seek safety rather than taking risks. At least personal risks, they'll take huge risks when on other's safety but usally not their own.
And i would also agree that has some advantages for living here as well. Definitely safer than south american countries at the same level of development.
What we think of as "masculinity", or at least the old school movie version of it in terms of personal initiative, self reliance, standing up for what's right as an underdog is TOTALLY not encouraged here. Haha.
So yeah I really get your point, everything about the goals people set here have to do with their ability to provide for and secure a woman.
Which I guess makes a lot of sense given how few women there are.
And also having clearly defined goals like "house" i think make people more docile. It's like how everybody is down for the revolution until they got something to lose. And I'm not shitting on people here when I say that I'm totally the same way.
Listen good points there, I wasn't trying to be the PC police or anything I was just where that was going. If all people are equal, then we are all equally likely (and frankly entitled) to the pursuit self-serving agendas.
I suspect many Chinese men will end going the way smilir to the Japanese herbivore men.
