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Q: Do Chinese girls play hard to get with foreign guys?

I don't understand Chinese girls.

Which, admittedly, is only slightly less than I understand any other girls:p

Do the girls here try to play hard to get, and expect the guy to chase chase chase? (and, does it matter who the guy is??)

I've read about the male:female ratio makes it a girls world... but the female:foreigner ratio is a LOT lower.. so, if we're 'an upgrade' (as one of my friends put it), why would they play hard to get, when there's so many other fish out there???

9 years 37 weeks ago in  Relationships - China

 
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Posts: 1633

Shifu

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If that's what they are doing, they aren't very good at it. I haven't had to break down any walls in my quest for the prize during my time here.

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9 years 37 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2592

Emperor

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It depends on what type of girl you want.  If you want a "foreigner worshiper", they are easy to get.  Go to any expat bar,english school or anywhere in Shanghai and you will find them.  They will not be hard.  However, there is another brand of girl that will be a bit of a challenge.  She will be from a "traditional" upbringing, sometimes from the countryside, but curious of foreigners.  She wants to go with you, but she cannot be percieved as such a girl.  She is not playing hard to get as western women know this game.  She wants to save face with friends and also go with you so she needs you to give her a reason to be with you.  This is your challenge.  If you are patient, persistent and pursuasive (and not in a sleazy sort of way), she will eventually succumb.

There are plenty of girls like this, especially attending universities.  Too shy to approach you, but if they can reconcile their desire for something different with their traditional upbringing....

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9 years 37 weeks ago
 
Posts: 5600

Emperor

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i have not come across many situations where i have to chase the girl. but what seems like playing hard to get is really bargaining. remember everything here is lie cheat scam and bargain. what i do in these situations is i make it clear what i am looking for and what i am willing to do. if this is not accepted i "walk away" but leave the line of communication open. they usually come back to bargain or accept. 

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9 years 37 weeks ago
 
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xinyuren, an intellectual turn on, give me a break, so your not a wolf, you're pure dog. Anyone else try to have an intellectual conversation with  80% of the Chinese Women

Before my wife

There answers were as follows:
If you have a house
If you have a car
If you have money
If you can get me out of China
I can pay you for a green card

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9 years 37 weeks ago
 
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I am going to wager a guess as to the why they play hard to get. 

And this is a common... *A* common... reason. They want to know if you're just looking for a lil spank and tickle or if you may be a potential... boyfriend/husband/way out of China whatever.

The easy ones, on the other hand, might be looking for something more than a lil boom boom, but figure if they show ya the goods up front, you'll move in for the serious quicker. 

If you are looking for something serious, then the ones that play hard to get may be a little more worth your time, no matter what their intentions are. 

As Isaid... A common.. one of a few reasons. 

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9 years 37 weeks ago
 
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xinyueren, I didn't mean it as an offensive jesture,, I was young once. I'm just stating what they eventually want. Go get them, just be sure your protected. The HPV virus is the largest STD in China with a whopping 96% of all sexually active Chinese have according to China's version of the CDC.

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9 years 37 weeks ago
 
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Ya, but you misunderstood my comments to crimo.  I'm not young anymore and I much prefer romance to cheap sex.  Romance has always been a cat and mouse game and there is nothing more interesting to a cat than a good mouse chase.  Or was I a wolf?  I'm confusedblush

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9 years 37 weeks ago
 
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just because sex happens with out the intention of marriage does not mean it's cheap or without passion

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9 years 37 weeks ago
 
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Emperor

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The first Chinese girl I ever was with here I met at a pub. We went on a date the next day for a walk around Dawanglu. She wanted to show me her office. It was around 9 at night, so no one was there. As soon as we got into her office she jumped me. 

No, not hard to get at all. 

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9 years 37 weeks ago
 
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