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Q: Do you have an opinion ?.
There are a few different theories about what is really most important for Chinese female youngsters as they grow up in life. Some may think that a good career or job, money and a management position with lots of money and benefits are their most important goal to achieve. Others may think that since baba and mama will select their better half, love is not really that important. and it could be another gropu that may think that to meet their ideal "prince' fall in love, get married and have children, and be happy will be their goal to achieve. It also could be other trends of thoughts.
Based on your observations and experiences, what will you say is most important for Chinese females today ?.
12 years 5 weeks ago in Relationships - China
I've been going out for over two years with my current girlfriend, and while the parents are very important, they're definitely not the end all be all for her.
I think these days the young (educated) Chinese girls are at the point where they're trying to reconcile their desire for wealth and love. They want both. I'd say at the moment, things are still leaning toward the money/career side of things. (But then again, isn't that something all women need - financial stability to raise a family?)
As far as I'm concerned, there are two obstacles. First, she firmly believes her chances for a good career (and good salary) are highest in China. Second, though she doesn't mention it, the man HAS to earn more than the woman. Anything else would be seen as somewhat shameful and 'unmanly'. Though I make enough to live comfortably, with her level of education and guanxi there's a chance she could have a really good position.
But it's tough to generalize these things. One of my girlfriend's best friends just married a young nuclear engineer. Guy graduated from the top university in the country but is still making peanuts, and comes from a 'poor' family (while hers is loaded). She bitches constantly about these things, even though they're newly married and she's pregnant. Not the type of behavior you'd expect. She also told my girlfriend that the most important thing was really being careful to marry someone whose parents were well off. I feel so sorry for the young husband.
I would say carreer. Husbands come and go, and sometimes keep an "er nai" or Xiao San 小 三 on the side, so it is important for them to have something that is THEIRS and that cannot be taken away.
True love? Well, there are billions of people all over the world, so in terms os statistics there are those who found it. But then again, the same could be said for the Million dollar lottery. What are the chances of it being YOU.
I contend that the young Chinese girls, (for the most part and yes I know there are exceptions) learn lessons in love from their mothers and fathers and we all know that our definition of "true love" is totally lost on that generation of Chinese people. Affection, non existent. Romance, non existent. Treating eachother as 50/50 equals, non existent. Arguing and violent behaviour - acceptable. Hitting the children, existent. (I hear this one many times in the apartment above me.)
So, how could they possibly have any notion of what is really important? They believe that the most important thing is whatever their parents tell them to believe. They may say something different but when the chips are down they will "follow the leader."
