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Q: do you really want to get a stable chinese girlfriend or get laid?
I have realized after dating several chinese girls that the cultural difference is pretty big. They are always talking about marriage, babies, etc. When they start talking about marriage i start having a big pressure, probably is because you dont love yoyr girlfriend otherwise you are willing to marry her. I have even found more flexible girls with more western way of thinking but it seems fall in love in china is a big deal.
you break it you buy it, buyer beware is the only rule in china, but in major cities its getting better, 20 percent of married women admit to cheating so green hats will be in fashion soon, things are changing slowly.
icnif77:
Was is 'cheating' or 'chatting'?
Chinese tend to confuse similar words in Englo
My heart and intimate part are closely connected, and they influence each other. Often!
Sort of both - getting laid is good, and if it leads to something long term, I'm ok with that as well.
I don't believe in 'looking for love' - love is something that should come naturally... not automatically!
As for the babies and marriage thing - I think you'd have to be an idiot to start talking about marriage in the timeframes most Chinese women will (ie, within a couple of dates). Also, just because 'love' is involved is NOT a good enough reason to get married... there are so many other IMPORTANT factors!!! (and no, I don't mean money)
Vicious Snark Attack On!
I have realized after dating several chinese girls that the cultural difference is pretty big
It took dating several? Hey after realizing they block the internet, pee on the street, and practice gendercide I realized the cultural difference was pretty big...Great observation there.
When they start talking about marriage i start having a big pressure, probably is because you dont love yoyr girlfriend otherwise you are willing to marry her
Your English is so poor I can't decide if you are talking about yourself or somebody else...
I have even found more flexible girls with more western way of thinking but it seems fall in love in china is a big deal.
Yes, love is only a big deal in China, and Romeo and Juliet, the Odyssey, Doctor Zhivago, and Les Miserables are all about that crass materialistic, sex obsessed western free-love.
-Rant against stupidity is now over.-
Welcome to China where if you have a stable relationship and no girlfriends the locals will consider you quaint, a liar or too poor.
wow, thanks for reinforcing the stereotype many chinese have about foreign guys with your casual misogyny.
do you feel superior in your attitude to sex and relationships?
are you SO indifferent to cultural differences that you can not see where the girls are coming from?
While you might think it is all a 'joke' about how many girls you can lay without committing, remember these girls are all people too, despite the fact they might be clingy, throw temper-tantrums, behave like children or in a illogical fashion, they are still people who should not be treated as disposable sex toys.
Ask yourself, how would you feel if a bunch of guys thought it was ok to treat your sister like that, or accorded your mother with the same level of respect you do to chinese girls when you don't take into account their level of immaturity?
you want casual sex? go to a prostitute. at least then you are under no illusions about the relationship between you both and you can't misunderstand her.
rasklnik:
Although I agree with your objections, I feel you may have fallen for flamebait...echina answers is neither the place for "real debate" nor a platform forcr ideas...is seems to be more of a internet carcrash...
Shining_brow:
Just a question Sorrel - is the girl using the guy just as a portable ATM any different from the guy using her as a sex toy? Do you think there's the same level of 'respect'??
sorrel:
@rasklnk
true, any question like this is really just looking for self-justification for treating women like this.
However, to say nothing is as almost as bad as treating it as acceptable.
@Shining
what do you think?
do you think someone's body/self respect is of less value that a wallet full of money?
does money have feelings?
IMO there is a big difference between f***ing a body and disposing of it as no value, and the gold-diggers, as shallow as they are, in their desperate attempts at a fulfilling life.
Let's be honest, it's so easy to get laid as a foreigner in China that even the ugliest and most introvert expats can get the best looking girls over here.
But, there are really good women in China, the type you want to settle down with because they are wonderful partners.
Complicated choice.
