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Sign up with Google Sign up with FacebookQ: Do you say "thank you" to fuwuyuan, ayi, taxi drivers etc.?
I did this out of ignorance when I first got here, stopped doing it for a few years to better "fit in", and now started doing it again recently, local customs be damned. I personally find that it puts me in a better mood, and I've grown to hate the way that fuwuyuan, ayi, drivers and the like are treated here. Pipe dream or not, I hope that my thank you helps a little bit.
Do you say "thanks" to people or not? If not, what are your reasons?
Do you know any Chinese that buck the custom and are liberal with their "thanks"?
I always say thanks, its common courtesy, and if you are polite to a waitresses they usually remember you and are more friendly when you go back to that place.
I find that most of my chinese friends usually say thanks where there is some sort of interaction between them and the waiters/drivers/etc, but they leave it out when there is not a necessity to talk (for instance, a random worker at a restaurant dropping off some food at your table). So I just kinda count it off as a difference in culture.
When arrogant people (usually part of the new money crowd) start talking down to waiters or cashiers just because they think they can, that is what pisses me off.
I say 'xie xie' in China as often as I say 'Thank you' in English speaking countries.
When I say 'xie xie', Chinese almost always smile, what I take it as a friendly gesture, and I like to see it.
I take 'thank you' as 'manner' or 'habit', and I wouldn't make an exceptions in any other foreign language (country).
it is just good manners to say thank you
I always tell my Kids to do it
So I must set the example and also say thank you
Thank you for your question
Yes I always say thank you.
I'm just like the original OP. I wen't through a phase where I stopped saying think you. It's a habbit that I picked up in China. Also after a few cases of people being rude to me it rubbed off on me and resulted in me no longer saying thank you.
I'm back to saying it 100% of the time again. Even if a taxi driver or someone seems to have a bit of an attitude, I still say "thank you, goodbye" as I'm getting out of the taxi. If anything it makes me feel a little better knowing that I'm polite to people.
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I also add a "man zou" to taxi drivers as I get out. It's the icing on my "courtesy cake".
But sometimes I mess it up and say it to fuwuyuan when I'm leaving. They give me the most inquisitive looks.
Yes i always say thank you
In fact i say ( xie xie ) followed by thank you, its just habit to say it both ways now
I have always said thank you where ever i have been, it was the way i was brought up, with manners.
Being a Chinese person myself, I say "xie xie" to them all the time, except when the service is terrible or the servant has a bad attitude. My dad does the same like I do.
I consider it as a significant arrogance and rudeness and superiorly of those people who don't say "thanks(xie xie)" to the servants as long as the service is not too bad, regardless of their nationality.
GuilinRaf:
I chat with the security guards at my school, I even know their names.
My teaching colleagues scolded me last month telling me that it does not look good for a teacher to be too friendly with the guards.
i just ignore them (the teachers) as I will be friendly to anyone who is friendly to me, regardless of job, class, education, etc.
But thats just me, and by what I see, you (Oh China) are the same!
I almost always say it too, and I really believe it makes their day better as well.
Yes. This is one of the things I don't believe "When in Rome.." is really applicable. I think it's just rude not too. And they sometimes say your welcome so it's not like they think it's weird or anything.
There's a word for thank you in Chinese so what's the reason for not using it? Because those less cultured don't?
I agree with someone else that there are a few unique situations where I won't say it, and that's simply when the service is REALLY bad.
For example, there's a lady at my local grocery store who always slams the money on the table. I thought nothing of this and didn't think it was rude until I noticed she always hands money to every Chinese person, but when it's me she slams it on the table. When it's Chinese people she will help them put stuff in the bag, when it's me she wont...... she's one lady that never gets a thank you from me as a result
always show your appreciation. it encourages people when they do something right.
As others have said, yes I always say thanks unless I am not happy about what I have received or the way in which it's been delivered.
One exception; when a waiter is topping up my tea (or beer) my wife told me a delicate tapping of the fingers on the table means the same thing and tbh I get a lot of (apparently) honest surprised gratitude that I know this.
I try to, will make exceptions in some cases where people just don't deserve it. I dislike the way lots of locals yell at people serving them one way or the other and never give as much as a smile or thanks back. The working people are those who make this country prosper.
Always. In fact, I've had to control myself whenever I see people in restaurants not saying thank you, banging on the table, shouting etc. It's just not on. I completely agree with Crimo China - saying thank you encourages people when they do something right, and every little helps. No wonder why many waiters/waitresses/taxi drivers/ayis/workers in general are so jaded here - they're either looked down on by customers or not appreciated by their employers enough. Shame.
Scandinavian:
agreed. the whole concept of positive reenforcement doesn't exist in China. You can see how parents use fear to make their children behave rather than reward.
derek:
Scandinavian is 100% right here and I also drives me crazy to see how the parents use fear tactics daily.
I like many on here always say xie xie followed by thank you. I also say it to people who make an effort to move out of my way on a bus or in the street etc or show me any form of courtesy. As others have alluded every little bit helps. I am a person who has worked in many menial jobs as well as managed/trained/advised at a high level and know full well that it is nice to be appreciated and appreciate all levels of worker.
Not saying thank you doesn't make you Chinese, it makes you an arse.
I always say thank you to everyone even when I am angry.
Of course I do, I'm a gentleman.
GuilinRaf:
We desperately need more Ladies and Gentlemen.
In the past, it was something to aspire to.
Today, it is a punch line....
I always say Thank You. Always. Even when I don't have to.
The very few times I don't say it for whatever reason (if the person doesn't deserve it or made me angry), it feels somewhat wrong.
A lot of people in China kept telling me I was too polite, but I believe one can never be too polite.