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Posts: 122

Shifu

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Q: Do you try to avoid making other people "lose face"?

I generally try to avoid any comment or action that could make someone "lose face"  in front of other people.

 

However there are sometimes when I don't have the time or the mood to be guessing what I shouldn't say or do and just want to have a problem sorted out.

 

Do you care about making someone else lose face?

13 years 20 weeks ago in  Culture - China

 
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Posts: 4397

Emperor

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  No more than I do anywhere else. This concept of 'face' as being a Chinese thing is ridiculous. It's absurd. It's foolish beyond belief.

  Now that attack at the bones of your question might very easily be taken by you as a personal affront or may have caused you a slight twang of hurt pride. It wasn't truly meant, I was just making a point, that being that saving face and protecting ones own pride is universal. In fact I had to tread far more carefully back home to avoid causing someone to lose face than I ever have here, and i've got the scars to prove it.

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13 years 20 weeks ago
 
Posts: 9631

Emperor

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No, if they don't want to act like grown ups, why should I ?

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13 years 20 weeks ago
 
Posts: 20134

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This afternoon, I asked my part-time job Kindergarten manager for last two weeks pay. He replied: 'I'll give you money in the evening!' 

 

After that, I had 2 hours lesson in another School, and at the finish I dial his mobile phone. He'd rather disconnected his phone, then say: 'Look, I am sorry, but I don't have money today. I'll give you tomorrow, or next week, or whenever!'

 

What I don't get at the 'losing face' farce is, why nobody thinks about me?

Maybe I am losing something, too.

No Chinese asks himself what I will do without money. Maybe I am hungry, maybe I promised I will return loan to somebody, or any other of 10 000 possible reasons.

EDIT: I work in the same Kindergarten since Nov 19, 2012. Kindergarten has opening for 3 Foreign teachers. I am the only Foreign teacher, who works there since. Foreign teachers at that Kindergarten don't last longer than two weeks. I work 6 hours per week, for pay of 1100 Rmb. Beside that Kindergarten, I also work in two Language Schools, one full-time (Resident permit sponsor), and another one part-time job, all together with private tutoring around 30 hours per week, for some 15 000 (just saying: 'Traveler is MORON!') Rmb per month.
Kindergarten never cheated me, and they never owed me more than two weeks pay.

I described 'pay failure' at echinacities only once, with Helen Group. My whole post here is about 'losing face' farce. How'smyEnglish T.? Can't you read?Any pills handy?

Traveler:

I will try to be nice, and I will put a smile at the end of the comment, just to be extra nice.

 

Don't you have trouble with just about every employer you work for? They never pay on time?

 

Are you working legally (it appears not, working at two places)? Are you a qualified teacher? Are you a native speaker or near-native speaker?

 

If not, do you think that has any bearing on why employers never treat you with respect?

 

Just saying... :-)

13 years 20 weeks ago
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13 years 20 weeks ago
 
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On my last working week at part-time job in Dalian Kids Castle Kindergarten, all 4 classrooms (5Y) are fullangry of parents, who are attending my classes.

I am not sure, why parents are in the classroom, butt.....am guessing I did something right in the last half of the year working there. 

 

Kindergarten asked me to change my decision and stay in Dalian, with full-time job offer (F visa).

I am Non-native, not qualified English teacher, working in China since 2009.

 

Let's lose some face, Traveler!

 

 

 

JustinF:

I am surprised that you got accepted to be a teacher. I also feel bad for those kids who are spending the most important part of their educational period learning bad English. I am guessing that you are just another white taking advantage of that recruitment flaw in China at the cost of innocent children.

13 years 19 weeks ago
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Traveler:

Oh, Justin. All of a sudden I like you  ... Shift+R improves the quality of this image. Shift+A improves the quality of all images on this page.

13 years 19 weeks ago
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icnif77:

So, what do you suggest I should do? Should I ask parents to go home? Should I say to parents: 'I don't deserve such a high pay, because am not qualified teacher, and poor, innocent kids shouldn't 'suffer' any longer!'?

Where are priests located in China? After reading your moralising comment, I feel sudden 'urge' to see priest.

 

Should I say: 'No, thanks!' to new, 100 000 Rmb/year job offer (Contract)?'

 

How come somebody online feels entitled to judge work I do?

 

It is not English nativity or teaching professionalism at work here. Kids just like me! It's that simple!

Whatever I am concerned, you can stuff your 'birth place' anywhere you like. In the real life, there was no English teacher in last 6 months, to match me at this Kindergarten. None! And, Dalian is Native English teacher's city!

13 years 19 weeks ago
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13 years 19 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1989

Peasant

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That's a lesson I am trying to learn too. Sometimes I did "save" someone's face. 

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13 years 19 weeks ago
 
Posts: 223

Shifu

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If I like and respect you, of course. If you are a stranger, most likely yes.

 

If you've ever done something wrong to me in China, then no,  I will instead go out of my way to make you lose face. Especially if you try to use the "this is China" excuse for when you do something wrong.

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13 years 19 weeks ago
 
Posts: 53

Governor

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I do but it all depends on whether it's worthy or not. Sometimes it's better to point it out directly so that they could know what could possiblly go wrong.

 

:

That's a good idea too. But doesn't this still make somebody lose his face? I kinda sense that one of the reasons of this issue is also that you are right? Being right is not as comfortable as I thought. Some people simply they don't like to told or shown they were wrong. Thus they feel losing face. Maybe I am wrong. I lately, learn a lot about this issue. It looks that it is much more than the pride and it could be a matter of honor. crying

13 years 19 weeks ago
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13 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Governor

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fuck it, I enjoy making the bad people lose face. To be honest..........you can see in their eyes they really don't care they know they are cheating the fuck out of us but still they stand there with innocent eyes- fuck them. make them lose face!

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13 years 19 weeks ago

call me 18701756064

 
Posts: 5

Governor

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fuck it, I enjoy making the bad people lose face. To be honest..........you can see in their eyes they really don't care they know they are cheating the fuck out of us but still they stand there with innocent eyes- fuck them. make them lose face!

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13 years 19 weeks ago

call me 18701756064

 
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A: I'll give my two cents on the age part. It's not as easy but can defin
A:I'll give my two cents on the age part. It's not as easy but can definitely be done. I was 21, fresh out of university and landed my first teaching job in china as a homeroom kindergarten teacher on a pretty standard 20,000/month salary. I'm 1 year in now and am still happy. Pretty much all international kindergarten jobs on here want 2 years experience, but many will still accept if you have experience in your home country. With that being said, being white and having a nice looking face is much more of a decision factor in china vs the west, if you can- use it to your advantage. Good luck finding something! -- brinsleym