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Sign up with Google Sign up with FacebookQ: Does living in China have a shelf-life?
Ive been here since 2006 and have no plans of heading home, yet after staying here a few years a mate of mine (who had been here for a few years prior to me) said that ''it was time'' and that life in China had a shelf-life.
Financial considerations aside how many veterans here see themselves getting old in the Middle Kingdom?
Definitely there's a "shelf-life." I really think that after a year, people should go home. I've been here for 15 years, have a Chinese wife and kids...and I sure as s*^t would have been much better off going back much earlier.
It's a trap here: easy lifestyle and better standard of living whilst you're employable, but as one gets older, your kids need to go to a "real" school, you have no social benefits to rely on, visa conditions and restrictions get tighter, there's no utopia here.
I used to think like you...as long as I've got something to offer then life is a cake-walk, but now I dread the knock at the door that may signal the end of the joy-ride.
Enjoy it whilst you're young and enjoy it while it lasts.
Paulberger:
family and kids are the one factor i think will send me home. i'm not quite at that stage yet, so i can only speculate about it. but i'm pretty sure your situation is what would send me packing.
andy74rc:
Same here. End of this year will be 10 years in China. I did achieve carrier development and experience. Now it's time to go somewhere else. Can't fossilize here.
Sinobear:
Fossilize here...ahhhhhh I hate you! I want to hit you with my petrified limbs! But a good analogy nonetheless.
Definitely there's a "shelf-life." I really think that after a year, people should go home. I've been here for 15 years, have a Chinese wife and kids...and I sure as s*^t would have been much better off going back much earlier.
It's a trap here: easy lifestyle and better standard of living whilst you're employable, but as one gets older, your kids need to go to a "real" school, you have no social benefits to rely on, visa conditions and restrictions get tighter, there's no utopia here.
I used to think like you...as long as I've got something to offer then life is a cake-walk, but now I dread the knock at the door that may signal the end of the joy-ride.
Enjoy it whilst you're young and enjoy it while it lasts.
Paulberger:
family and kids are the one factor i think will send me home. i'm not quite at that stage yet, so i can only speculate about it. but i'm pretty sure your situation is what would send me packing.
andy74rc:
Same here. End of this year will be 10 years in China. I did achieve carrier development and experience. Now it's time to go somewhere else. Can't fossilize here.
Sinobear:
Fossilize here...ahhhhhh I hate you! I want to hit you with my petrified limbs! But a good analogy nonetheless.
my long long term goal hasn't really been decided. as for my long term goal, it definitely includes china. i think every expat here has a different "shelf life" in china. it depends on their attitudes, preferences, patience, and a number of other things. i have friends that have been here for 20 something years and have a smile on their face everyday. these are the expats i wish to become like. then i have friends that have been here for 2 years and want to kill themselves. i think it all boils down to your personal attitude and demeanor. personally, i love my life in china. i've set myself up in a nice comfy little situation and if things keep, i will happily stay as long as possible. but, things do change over time, so i cannot predict what will happen.
I couldn't have asked for more contradicting answers
Although I do agree that it really depends on individuals situation here as well as their personal outlook on things.
Jona:
Im based in Beijing for a foreign company so I guess I get a decent deal.
I've been here a few years now and very happy here although the thought of having kids here is rather concerning (pollution and the lack of an education that challenges people to challenge ideas and stand for what they believe).
Being European and having grown up in South Africa where I could play sports inj the afternoons and enjoy nature, I sometimes feel that I'd be robbing my kids of that.
I guess we'll see in a year or two how things unfold.
andy74rc:
Being denied the possibility to do the things you just underlined (having the chance to live in a clean environment, outdoor activities and so on) will become a burden heavier and heavier over time. Trust me.
Nessquick:
andy, this is a factor, what make my life here really miserable. Yet, someone think that with stay here another years, suffer this everyday shit just for the vision of a bit more money ... I am so scared, that I may not leave this place alive ...
For me, it's when it's time to have a home and kids. I grew up in a non-polluted environment, next to a forest and the sea, where people understand the concept of "right-side driving" and follow simple civil behavior, where kids can be kids, where school is not 100% rote learning, where I can choose my leaders, etc, etc. I would feel terrible to give my kids less than that. Chinese Dream is for now words on paper, decades from being a reality.
Seems that rich Chinese share your thoughts @Dr Monkey & Paul Berger
DrMonkey:
Also, I read that about 25% of Chinese studying abroad come back. I mean, duh... Look how Chinese scientists shine abroad, versus in China. Put a plant in a closet or a greenhouse, same difference. But face-saving culture, culture of "we are poor victims", never mention what's wrong yada yada, those who can go do it and just shut-up. No ripples.
Paulberger:
@jona... i can't access the link... i'm one of the sad individuals here that doesn't have a vpn... i know i know... i dont have all those social networking profiles so i figured i wouldn't need it... i'm an idiot...
Jona:
Paul,
No stress, you can Google the stats of rich Chinese first sending their kids to study abroad and then looking to move abroad themselves.
It does indeed have a shelf life, i'm covered in mold and beginning to smell bad for being here so long. Fortunately i'm heading back to Blighty for a month soon, then i'll probably be happy to come back. If I come back reluctantly, i've got a problem.
Paulberger:
covered in mold?!? a lot of chinese produce have this problem at the super market but that doesn't mean anything! it still sits their ready to be bought! bread, veggies, the walls.. no my friend, you are just adjusting to your environment!
I think when you fully understand what Chinese people are like, or see yourself becoming like that - its time to go.
Nessquick:
I have just almost accepted idea of my wife. And I know doing this, will really kill me.
My shell life is on the end here. Maybe just screw it for the last year ?
Let the in-law come over to care about us ? means, we both work hard, auntie cook, send and pick son of kindergarden, cook food for us, live with us just for the idea we may save 60k in a year ? ( my wife think will be 100k, but that's impossible. possible, but than I can not even have home-baked bread )
It is a last day today. Tomorrow sign the new contract, which push me to stay at least 1 year with the company. With the auntie at home, pollution outside, scary food, and idiotic drivers. Or pick the plane, take son and work hard in clean enviroment, with taxes and so on, but wth good education and healthcare, time for play for kids, place for play, and some month later, come over to pick up wife from china ... because she do not want go until she is financialy very safe.
What to do ? Personaly, wanna go home and have a try. also this work here would be nice and some financial kick up, but ..
dharma86:
You have to ask yourself can your wife adjust to living in a new country. This is the problem with Chinese if its not China its 'different'. Will she be happy.
Living anywhere in the world has a shelf life. It's called death.
Red_Fox:
Sino! Shelf-life, expiry date, best before? Big diff, my friend:
How big is the shelf? And where is it? Kitchen or bookcase? Expiry date? Yes, we all expire one day. Ugh. (Don't wanna think about it.) Best before? Hell, I was best before I was 20. Worse thereafter and probably even worse in the hereafter....
Oh, boy. What a conundrum.
From the above clearly not a lot of 'Laowais' on this form plan to get old in China.
Seems the ones that have Chinese wives are the ones who are considering the most to get out (mostly for the benefit of their kids).
It's interesting to note that having a "Chinese Family" you'd think they'd be the ones staying here for the longterm.
I dont think it has a shelf life. I prefer to think of China as a cryogenisis chamber. You get in and get comfortable and before you realize it you have sped through time and space. You wake up in the exact same position you started. Even thouh you got fatter and older, the women you attract hasnt gotten any older. The world has changed around you. ie gotten more expensive but were still clinging on to the idea of a china when we first arrived.