The place to ask China-related questions!
Beijing Shanghai Guangzhou Shenzhen Chengdu Xi'an Hangzhou Qingdao Dalian Suzhou Nanjing More Cities>>

Categories

Close
Welcome to eChinacities Answers! Please or register if you wish to join conversations or ask questions relating to life in China. For help, click here.
X

Verify email

Your verification code has been sent to:

Didn`t receive your code? Resend code

By continuing you agree to eChinacities's Privacy Policy .

Sign up with Google Sign up with Facebook
Sign up with Email Already have an account? .
Posts: 2878

Shifu

5
6
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
1

Q: Excess curiosity is definitely rude.

I saw this in an another thread but I was really proud of myself for making a great analogy and wanted more attention for it.

 

A lot of the frustration that expats have here is that locals can be really intrusive into our privacy. A lot of the questions you see people on this board venting it's about the hellos yelled by idiots or the dumb invasive questions. 

 

One of the responses you hear, both from locals and from usually fresh western expats is "they're just curious is all!" and I just want to go on record as saying that curiosity is no excuse for rudeness. It's like getting upset at someone cutting in line and being told "don't worry! that person is just rude!". hahahaha yeah no shit!

 

Let me give an example of inappropriate curiousity. If i see a beautiful european girl on the subway thats just my type or something, i'm not going to go up to her and ask her to take her clothes off or show me naked pictures because i'm curious what she looks like without them. Even though I am totally gonna be curious, I demonstrate self control because that's what a civilized adult living in a society does to avoid offending reasonable people. If that girl goes online and complains about the freak on the subway asking what she looks like naked, only a f-ing idiot will jump in and say "Hey! He was just curious! What's the big deal?"

 

Heres a less extreme example, I really am pretty curious about sources of funds of the moderately wealth/successful local families that I know. Both people at work and just social acquaintances in general. I always really want to hear the story of how they went from ashy to classy over the past couple decades because I find those stories very interesting. But I don't EVER ask, because same as above, it's not appropriate. Just because I want to know doesn't mean that I would impose an uncomfortable situation on someone who has done me no wrong to satisfy my desire to know. Again, self control...I want something, but i don't have to get it. 

 

I feel like the 'just curious' excuse is making the assumption that the people doing this are 4 year old children. These are f-ing adults we're talking about. And I am sure that 99% of them DO know better. How? Because the stranger asking my salary i'm 99% sure wouldn't go up to the local guy getting out of the nice BMW and ask him. That guy is either too stupid to realize that if it's rude to do that to a local guy in a nice car, that it's also rude to do that to an expat, or they decide that there are no risk of consequences to offending us the way a connected local could cause trouble for them and decide they don't care if it's rude they want the answer. Neither one of those things isn't shameful, though stupid is more forgivable than rude even if it's just as obnoxious.

 

So yeah the people doing that are trashy as hell. Asking personal questions is rude, and 'just curious' doesn't cut it as an excuse.

 

This classy, sophisticated rant brought to you by expatlife26. Obey your thirst.

8 years 36 weeks ago in  Money & Banking - China

 
Highest Voted
Posts: 2231

Shifu

5
5
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

Agree. A few possibilities.

 

1. They on purpose are trying to make you uncomfortable, i.e. camouflaged attack, war is on (always) for these. Plenty of mainlanders are well versed with this.

 

2. Plain stupidity. e.g. Ask anyone about their wife/husband/kids/marital-family status --- what if his wife/kid just died?  This is the moron's way of making friends. Personally I find this has to do with education level, the lower the more likely they ask stupid questions like these. My guess is that they really don't know anything wider than that to talk about.

 

3. Fishing for info, because info is power. Insurance sales know all about this kind of stuff, so do thieves and con man. 

 

All three are equally dangerous and disgusting. 

 

A civilized, educated person (to me anyway) let the other person talks whatever s/he likes to talk about. If s/he likes telling you s/he would do it, if not now then when you know each other better. 

 

 

RandomGuy:

Number 3 is so true, that's why I always lie to them. My landlord doesn't know what I do in China, even less what company I work for, when we signed the lease and she asked, I lied to her and it came naturally. My coworkers and my boss have no idea where I live exactly, they only know my district and it is HUGE, they have never seen my Temporary Residence Permit that I got on my own. I only give them spare information or plainly lie to them, most Chinese think that Foreigners are too stupid to white lie so they take whatever I say for granted, they do not suspect anything.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

earthizen:

A survivor.  wink You need maximum ​protection in a place like this.

 


 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Answers (9)
Comments (26)
Posts: 724

Shifu

2
4
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
2

This is definitely a cultural thing. 

When I first started to learn English I was also exposed to some of the differences that I should be aware of, specifically, things I shouldn't do or say to a foreigner, e.g.

Don't ask about their...

age, especially ladies'

Phone number

Where they live

Salary

How much is the thing they bought

Are their eye/hair colors real

...

To young me, after I heard this, I had two questions and I asked my foreign teacher:

1. If you don't ask those, what on earth do you talk about...?

2. What if I want to know how old you are or where you live, how can I know it...?

He said:

1. We talk about weather, sports, lots of things

2. if you want to know my age after you know me well, you can come to my birthday party and you'll know. If you want to know where I live, you can follow me back home...

 

At that time, I took his words seriously. It made me confused. I couldn't understand why people don't ask about those things and they must take that much trouble to collect the information that they don't really care. And they only limit their topics to those boring things such as the weather.

 

Now I know it's only half the truth. There isn't strict privacy. Your name can be privacy to strangers. It depends on the environment you are in. Chinese talk about those 'privacy' topics like the way people talk about sports or weather, no one cares really, it's just a topic to start a conversation. So it's not Chinese that are curious, it's the topics that are must talked topics in China. Things we don't talk about? Sex.

ScotsAlan:

Ahem.... quote:  "Things we don't talk about? Sex."

 

Maybe not in front of women.... I have been to a few men only KTV nights wink.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

Shining_brow:

One of my students had written 'masturbation' on the classroom window (being used as a whiteboard). So, yeah, sex is a topic for some sort of discussion (if you consider teenage giggling as 'discussion' :p)

 

I think the issue is more about what's relevant to be known by a virtual stranger. Weather, sport, etc, are fairly open topics. Ages and salaries are not.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

expatlife26:

Appreciate your perspective on this.

 

I don't totally accept that it is a cultural thing, because as I mentioned that person approaching me wouldn't do so to another local who appeared wealthy. 

 

What I do accept as a cultural thing though, is that you, as well as people who say "they are just curious!" are trying to smooth things over. Make us feel like it's not rude or insulting. That's a cultural thing, and it's appreciated!

 

Most americans would probably handle it differently, if a foreigner was complaining that americans were rude to them we'd just agree that "yeah sorry, lots of americans are shit"

 

 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

RandomGuy:

Okay, then why is it Chinese always want to know my age, where I live, what's my job and what company I am working at, if I have someone in my life, how much money I make, ... but always refuse to let me know the same information about them?

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

expatlife26:

@Randomguy,

 

Yeah you said it better than I did. A cultural thing would be "we're not as private about certain things and don't understand why you wouldn't share that"

 

but thats not what it is. Spongebob, please correct me if you think i'm mistaken but I think most local people here are very private and reluctant to share details of their lives.

 

So the issue is that they feel a certain way about themselves and their privacy, but either can't comprehend that western people might also want things private...OR that they do understand it's rude but choose not to care.

 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

SpongeBob:

Hey guys, as I said, age, where you live, how much you make and so on are just topics to a Chinese, from what you are complaining, clearly you are taking it too seriously. We ask about those things all the time, but that doesn't mean you'll have to answer seriously. For an example, if someone asks you where you live, it's perhaps just a way to start a conversation, you don't have to be very specific about which rd or building or door number of where you live, actually, no one cares, you can say a large area or a large district, and he'll probably say, i know the place or I've been there. So it's not really about privacy or curiosity, just really depending on the person's social skills of where he's leading the topic. Of course, if you are a guy and she's a girl, she wants to know your age, where you live and how much you make, maybe she's analyzing the possibility of marrying you tomorrow. 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

SpongeBob:

Hey guys, as I said, age, where you live, how much you make and so on are just topics to a Chinese, from what you are complaining, clearly you are taking it too seriously. We ask about those things all the time, but that doesn't mean you'll have to answer seriously. For an example, if someone asks you where you live, it's perhaps just a way to start a conversation, you don't have to be very specific about which rd or building or door number of where you live, actually, no one cares, you can say a large area or a large district, and he'll probably say, i know the place or I've been there. So it's not really about privacy or curiosity, just really depending on the person's social skills of where he's leading the topic. Of course, if you are a guy and she's a girl, she wants to know your age, where you live and how much you make, maybe she's analyzing the possibility of marrying you tomorrow. 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

SpongeBob:

Hey guys, as I said, age, where you live, how much you make and so on are just topics to a Chinese, from what you are complaining, clearly you are taking it too seriously. We ask about those things all the time, but that doesn't mean you'll have to answer seriously. For an example, if someone asks you where you live, it's perhaps just a way to start a conversation, you don't have to be very specific about which rd or building or door number of where you live, actually, no one cares, you can say a large area or a large district, and he'll probably say, i know the place or I've been there. So it's not really about privacy or curiosity, just really depending on the person's social skills of where he's leading the topic. Of course, if you are a guy and she's a girl, she wants to know your age, where you live and how much you make, maybe she's analyzing the possibility of marrying you tomorrow. 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

SpongeBob:

Hey guys, as I said, age, where you live, how much you make and so on are just topics to a Chinese, from what you are complaining, clearly you are taking it too seriously. We ask about those things all the time, but that doesn't mean you'll have to answer seriously. For an example, if someone asks you where you live, it's perhaps just a way to start a conversation, you don't have to be very specific about which rd or building or door number of where you live, actually, no one cares, you can say a large area or a large district, and he'll probably say, i know the place or I've been there. So it's not really about privacy or curiosity, just really depending on the person's social skills of where he's leading the topic. Of course, if you are a guy and she's a girl, she wants to know your age, where you live and how much you make, maybe she's analyzing the possibility of marrying you tomorrow. 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

expatlife26:

I get that you're referring to a specific situation, where a girl is trying to make conversation with a guy she is interested in or somebody is trying to start a conversation. You're absolutely right about that, that's not hostile or insulting. But again that's not the only situation which exists.

 

Let me give an example of the type of situation we get upset about. Few months ago I was going to visit a friend who lives in a complex outside the city. So I was waiting for the shuttle that goes from the CBD to this complex and I was eating some take out sushi. A man comes over and stands very close staring at me and watching what i'm doing, I stare back. Refuses to make eye contact with him. Then he begins looking at the contents of my shopping bags. 

 

So I stand up and tell him to fuck off in an angry tone. He starts smiling and then laughing and walks off. 

 

At that moment I really just wanted to hit him, teach him some manners. Clearly he thought of me as like a zoo animal. My anger at his intrusion was amusing only. I did not hit him because of, once again, self control. 

 

This was not an impressive person. Short, soft, poorly dressed etc. Had I chosen to try and hurt him, he would not have been a match for me. I also want to say that I present myself well. I have a professional job and wear business attire. I don't look like the stereotype of the "foreign trash" people have, I look like a serious person, not a clown.

 

So why do men like him behave this way? How would he react if a well-dressed western person came over to his table and tried to look through his bags laughing at him? What if I had chosen to teach him a lesson in manners in the form of a broken nose? Would he be surprised that the upset animal had chosen to hurt him? Or would he understand his behavior had provoked me but he thought he could win a fight against me?

 

It's not like this is a unique situation either, i'm sure most everybody on this board can tell stories of many similar situations. I think because I don't have a local wife or girlfriend this happens LESS to me than to people who do. You read stuff posted by Mike or Rob or Eorthisio they get this kinda crap all the time.

 

Spongebob, seriously I'm glad that you're here to talk to us about this because I think all of us are genuinely curious and you seem like an alright person. Why do some local people act like that? 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

SpongeBob:

Unfortunately, people do that, to foreigners but not limited to foreigners. It's heavily depending on the individual, he is probably not well educated, didn't know manners. This happens a lot between Chinese too, we usually say things such as '看什么看,没见过帅哥/美女吗?‘meaning what are you looking at? haven't you seen handsome/beauty before? I would say, China can be a very crucial nation under certain situations. I know some girls who have dwarfishness, they are in their late 20s but only has the height of 3 year olds. When they walked in the street, they were stared at, pointed at, laughed at all the time. Some random guy just compare their height with his grandson and said you are even shorter than my 4 year old grandson, you wasted all the years of food. They started to learn dance, went on the TV and became little stars. They shared about their experiences to the world, they said if you don't stand on your knees, you are no shorter than the others. 

 

I used to have a foreign teacher from Australia, she was huge and one day she was riding a bike and a guy hit her and didn't apologies at all. Perhaps even laughed at her weight. She was upset so she told me her story. I forgot how I comforted her, I was young at that time, but few years later, I read an article about Chinese's attitude towards fat people, basically the world is for the thin, if you are fat, you don't have the right to eat, the world is for the thin, don't think abilities matters, everyone only cares about looks, if you cannot control your weight, you cannot control your fate, so you deserved to be hated and laughed at and piss at. Get thin or die! So I knew, if you are fat and if you are in China, it can be very unfortunate for you. 

 

In 2008 beijing olympics, the girl in read scandal you've probably heard of, is exactly the reflection of China, the better looking and thin girl went on the stage and did a fake singing and lied to the world while the other little girl who was a bit chubby and not so nice looking only showed her voice behind the stage and wasn't even mentioned. They were only 7 year olds and they were taught looks are everything and abilities don't matter. I just wanted to tell the director of the whole thing, he's too ugly for collecting the Oscar award himself, let me do it. ;)

 

So you know, China is a country where quality doesn't matter, what looks nice that's really matters. So no one cares how you feel, they just want to look cool themselves.  This happens to everyone not just you. Don't get bothered by idiots. Don't let them drag you to their level and beat you with their years of experience.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2488

Emperor

4
4
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

You are right of course. They know its wrong but dont give a shit because we are foreigners. Sure they will ask how much the bag is or car ect. But they dont go around asking how much money people make or have.

Its the same with the staring. I live in shenzhen, i dont want to hear how they have never seen a foreigner before. If its culture then why do they get uncomfortable when i point and laugh and stare at them? Why when i turn the question around and ask how much money they make they change the topic?

The biggest problem with many Chinese people is that they lack all power to look at themselves ( not just a chinese issue). So if you do any of the rude stuff back to them they will get uncomfortable or offended.

Next time you are in an elevator stare at them and talk about them in English. They cant run . try to use english they know. Really simple words like fat. They dont like it at all. So to pass it off as a 4 year old with down syndrome child like curiosity is just plain wrong.

They are just plain rude. Thats the end of it

expatlife26:

Yeah that's kinda my point here. It's trashy behavior, and of course the dumbasses yelling hello are the ones least able to stand up to it.

 

Not a big deal, of course there are trashy people back home to who say dumb shit to people who are different. But the difference I think is that we don't tend to stick up for them.

 

I bring a chinese friend back home some redneck calls him a dumb chink I'll be getting his back not saying "oh those guys are just being traditional" or something. I appreciate that's just not the chinese way...their way of dealing with it is to make an excuse so everybody saves face. Thats the whole "just curious" thing. But I def think it's a good topic for discussion.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2531

Emperor

4
4
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

Yup, it is true.

 

The thing is the Chinese brain is kind of messed up (mainland education). Like I mentioned before, their brain kind of pulls a computer error blue screens of death when they see a foreigner.

 

Call them out on it and they will smarten up.. even just saying "shen me?" and they will realize they are being rude. They know they are being rude, it is just in that moment all manners and logic go out the window. That's for the staring and whispering.

 

For the cat calling "Hellos" that just annoys the shit out of me because of the way they do it. That stupid Mickey mouse tone with the air of superiority (in which they clearly don't deserve).

 

I sure as hell won't defend their behavior, but I will try to help the foreigner understand that it usually  isn't 100% malicious and meant to be offensive. I do this to save the foreigner's sanity... not to be apologetic for the Chinese.

 

 

Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Posts: 860

Shifu

1
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
1

It's difficult sometimes to not think about things in China in an ethnocentric way. You cannot fully judge them because they do not share our views on what is rude and what isn't. They have their own cultural development on these things. Sometimes I think the brashness of their questions and comments quite refreshing. Their attitude is "why is anybody offended by the truth".  Sometimes the brashness is hard to deal with. I was a few kilos over weight and they called me fat. Sob. Hard to live up to Chinese version of normal weight

expatlife26:

I disagree though that the locals are these refreshing truth tellers. Don't you think they are some of the most eager liars and concealers of any kind of mistake?

 

Just because they don't mince words about being overweight doesn't make them refreshingly honest or anything.

 

Do you really think they are?

 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

expatlife26:

i guess where i'm going with that is that i'm agreeing with Mike that there is a big gap in how they expect to be treated and how they treat others.

 

I mean I accept cultural differences for some things. But not this, because I don't think they'd like it if the tables were turned.

 

It's not their culture that it's OK to point out obvious flaws and it's not considered offensive, it's that it's ok to point out obvious flaws of those you consider weaker than you. But you have to flatter the powerful. They might tell you everything they see wrong with you, but then if you give them a list of their faults it'd be like "hey what's this guys problem?"

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

DrMonkey:

Hu, being offended by the truth is a thing too in China, and not a little. Extreme (and funny) example
http://shanghaiist.com/2015/07/21/hunan-official-suspended-throwing-tantrum.php

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

Lord_hanson:

They are just rudely honest to you. To you think that they called Chairman Mao fatty or baldy?

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2231

Shifu

5
5
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

Agree. A few possibilities.

 

1. They on purpose are trying to make you uncomfortable, i.e. camouflaged attack, war is on (always) for these. Plenty of mainlanders are well versed with this.

 

2. Plain stupidity. e.g. Ask anyone about their wife/husband/kids/marital-family status --- what if his wife/kid just died?  This is the moron's way of making friends. Personally I find this has to do with education level, the lower the more likely they ask stupid questions like these. My guess is that they really don't know anything wider than that to talk about.

 

3. Fishing for info, because info is power. Insurance sales know all about this kind of stuff, so do thieves and con man. 

 

All three are equally dangerous and disgusting. 

 

A civilized, educated person (to me anyway) let the other person talks whatever s/he likes to talk about. If s/he likes telling you s/he would do it, if not now then when you know each other better. 

 

 

RandomGuy:

Number 3 is so true, that's why I always lie to them. My landlord doesn't know what I do in China, even less what company I work for, when we signed the lease and she asked, I lied to her and it came naturally. My coworkers and my boss have no idea where I live exactly, they only know my district and it is HUGE, they have never seen my Temporary Residence Permit that I got on my own. I only give them spare information or plainly lie to them, most Chinese think that Foreigners are too stupid to white lie so they take whatever I say for granted, they do not suspect anything.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

earthizen:

A survivor.  wink You need maximum ​protection in a place like this.

 


 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2587

Emperor

1
1
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

In Japan, if I don't make noises when I eat a meal cooked by my host, it is an insult.  Is insulting your host rude?  In America, if you don't reward good service at a decent restaurant, it is considered uncouth.  Is uncouthness rude?  In Brazil (?), the use of the peace sign with your hands is considered a profanity and a grave insult.  Is that rude?  These are rhetorical questions, but my point is what is considered rude is highly subjective depending on where you are standing.

 I hate people staring at me as much as the next weigouren (possibly more), but the proper way of viewing this is that it is rude in our countries.  The Chinese don't adhere to international standards, nor are they obliged to.  We can hate their actions, but in the end, we can choose to endure it or go home.

expatlife26:

I see where you're going with that...but I reject that argument that it's just a cultural thing because they don't want to be stared at either. 

 

The stuff about how in japan it's rude to do or not do something that is a legitimate cultural thing because it is related to reciprocal expections.

Staring is rude here too, they just do it anyway.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

Lord_hanson:

I agree with expat, xinyuren's statement can't be accurate because they don't do these things to others.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

RandomGuy:

expatlife is right, these are double standards because no Chinese will stare at another Chinese dressing differently or doing something weird, no Chinese wants to be stared at and chances are if you stare at them the same way they stare at foreigners they will not like it at all and think that you are rude if they don't insult you.

 

Double standards are a bad thing and there is no cultural difference that excuses that. People of color used to be singled out in the West, both by law and by the ethnic majority, but then White people understood their mistake and abolished these double standards.

 

Chinese need to do the same, it's that simple.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2587

Emperor

3
3
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

That being said, I do think there is a Universal sense of rudeness, but it has more to do with motive than it does with actions. If a person intentionally insulting you or causing you to be uncomfortable? Are they apathetic about it (don't care)? If that is the case, they are being rude, regardless of their actions.

earthizen:

This is the part you nailed it. The intention behind is the key. The surface layer, like in some culture, nodding means no, shaking your head means yes, not only isn't a big issue for most of the time, those habits can be changed relatively easily. When the intention is malicious that is when things get dangerous.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

xinyuren:

yeah, but the tricky part is judging someone's intentions.  How can we really know why someone is doing something?  This is why I just tell them forthrightly:  Don't stare at me.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse

earthizen:

You also nailed it , it is the tricky part. This is even worse with the face (i.e. fake) thing. Remember the Iverson story? Iverson's manager was in contact with the mainlander contact for nearly two years, they waited for Iverson to be in PRC before they extorted him, entrapment. 

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Posts: 544

Shifu

2
2
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

The thing is that they don't think they're being hypocritical. It is, in a way, a cultural thing.

 

Yes, it is true that Chinese won't ask these questions of other Chinese, and view it as rude to treat Chinese the way they treat non-Chinese, but in their mind, that's not being hypocritical, since for them, everyone not considered "Zhongguo ren" is "Waiguo ren", and the rules for Waiguo ren are completely different than for Zhongguo ren.

 

They would see "shouting Ni hao, Chinaman!" to a random Chinese as rude, while "Hello foreigner!" is acceptable, because the rules are different.

 

It's like how if someone said, "Isn't it hypocritical, and double standard, that humans are allowed in restaurants, but dogs aren't?", you would likely say that it's not hypocritical since dogs and humans are totally different, so different rules apply. Well, in China, Zhongguo ren and Waiguo ren are totally different. Notice how they have to keep bringing up how "foreign" you are, because that "foreignness" is of supreme importance.

xinyuren:

this is a good point.  Oh, if only I could live a day inside a Chinese mind.

8 years 36 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Posts: 3269

Emperor

4
4
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

a foreigner in their country is like a unique opportunity to single out somebody removed from the hierarchy. usually only tuhao get to do whatever they want, and the zhous must display fawning reverence and cooperation.

if you're on the receiving end, you dream of being able to push someone around a little, even if it's just a bunch of obviously intrusive questions, pictures and exclamations.

What both saddens and worries me about Mainlanders, is the large amount of people with this need. Sometimes it's just juvenile curiosity and think nothing of it. But sometimes it's less innocent: Concealed inults, passive aggression, harassment, provocation.

If China ever had a good government that gave people what they need most, they'd have to reassign most of the bureaucrats to care jobs, turning several megacities into massive psych wards. People are so disfunctional that they can't live independently anymore, and need round-the-clock supervision. Not surveillance; real care.

expatlife26:

yeah i think youre right.

 

Were in the unique position here of making more than they do but also being kinda vulnerable cause we don't know what we can get away with and we usually dont have people we can call on if we get in trouble.

 

Messing with us sort of appeals to that desire to speak truth to power we all have. It's like in school picking on somebody who is bigger than you but doesn't have any friends. You can look like a tough guy not going after an easy target, but at the same time they're still vulnerable.

 

So yeah its a chance to mess with somebody who both has it significantly better than you do but probably wont know how to do much about it

8 years 35 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
8 years 36 weeks ago
 
Know the answer ?
Please or register to post answer.

Report Abuse

Security Code: * Enter the text diplayed in the box below
Image CAPTCHA
Enter the characters shown in the image.
  • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd> <img> <br> <p> <u>
  • Web page addresses and e-mail addresses turn into links automatically.
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.
  • Textual smileys will be replaced with graphical ones.

More information about formatting options

Forward Question

Answer of the DayMORE >>
A:  "... through ..."?  Only "through" comes to mind is "S
A: "... through ..."?  Only "through" comes to mind is "Shenzhen agent can connect you with an employer, who's authorized to hire waigouren ... and can sponsor Z visa." It's not like every 10th person you meet in Shenzhen's hood can sponsor work visa ...  The only way to change from student to labourer visa is just a regular way by: 1. Finding an employer, who'll apply for an Invitation letter; 2. Exit China and apply for Z visa in your home country's Chinese embassy; 3. Enter China in 30-days after Z visa was stamped into your travelling instrument ...As I am aware, you won't be able to switch to Working permit by remaining in China....,so make ready for a return to your home .... -- icnif77