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anonymous
Q: Foreign problem in China?!
In a bit of a weird situation. I am a foreigner expat here in China, and have recently met another foreigner who likes me more than a friend. They seem nice enough but am not interested in them or anyone at the moment, but with the lack of foreigners I really dont want to lose them as a friend. Should I wait until they make a move and say no, potentially ruining the friendship, or do I act dumb or claim to like somebody else or? Can anybody suggest an outcome where I can avoid it going further than friendship without ruining it or anybody getting hurt. I'm afraid being such a minority here I cant afford to lose this friend.
10 years 30 weeks ago in Relationships - China
You need to talk to your friend about it, you need to be sure there is no romantic feelings from your side though.
You need to throw yourself into their arms and fully and wholly embrace their love. Whisper sweet nothings into his or her ears, talk about your unbridled desire to have many children with this person.
If you are rejected, just tell him or her that you'll find someone else, someone who isn't a complete bastard.
Or you could just tell the truth. However, if there's no romantic interest when one party is clearly interested, you'll have a very awkward friendship.
mArtiAn:
Alternately she (gotta be a she) could wait till he makes his move, then whisper 'sweet no-thanks' to him.
You are a foreigner expat eh? Just tell whom ever it is that you value their friendship and are not interested in being romantically involved.
TedDBayer:
Ever notice that the ''matty'' types never argue the point?"
the difficulty is with so few foreigners in some places you tend to socialise with the same people more often than you would at home, as you have done. I made sure i had local friends so i wasn't relying too much on any single ex-pat for company. This kept the friendships just as i wanted them: friendship, nothing more. Don't spend your time exclusively with this person UNLESS you want more to develop. You should get out and meet more local people anyway 
Englteachted:
No, foreigner Expats only hang out with foreigner Expats.
You want to be dishonest, inconsiderate with his feelings so you can keep him as your "foreign friend".
You want to use him them let him use you. You clearly do not have a real honest friendship with this person because your only concern is losing him as your "foreign friend".
Also , in our home countries , we are fortunate to develop socially as we grow up. Our noses aren't buried in books for 22 years. We aren't immature twits that can't accept no as answer. My dear foreigner, Expat , non-chinese, from a different country, go and develop some social maturity.
If the ex-pat makes no move, then do nothing. If he makes a move, be polite, but firm that you prefer your present relationship and that you are not interested in a relationship at the moment.Forget about hurting peoples feelings here. You are being honest and forthright.That is a higher virtue. What is the point of hurting yourself and the other person later?
A "foreigner expat" eh?
Double whammy on wanting to show you are not a Chinese poster, honest.
Ohh for the love of Pete
Please ask your face book friends if you are a foreigner and if you are a local please go study your course subjects so you can go abroad and meet all the non Chinese that you want
Failing that try posting this on the forum section where only really board people go to waste time
dom87:
me too. working in china causes me to have nothing to do in the office lol
