Few months ago, I was at my part-time job with 3-years olds. Lesson, we reviewed was:' Are you Tom? No, I'm not! I'm John', and 'Yes, I am!'

20 little ones in the Class. I am throwing a small ball to child's head, catching a bounce, and ask: Are you Linda? Girl's reply: Yes, I am.

Next was a boy. I asked: 'Are you Linda?' Boy didn't answer for a minute! Then, he pointed finger at me and screamed: 'LAOWAI!' All kids in the class started to chant: 'Laowai, Laowai.......'
TA's smiling, heading for exit. End of the class.

He is very resourceful kid. When I was using tape recorder for lessons, he would stand up and sit with me, like he is a teacher too. Then, he would pull wooden stick out of his pocket, and start to dismantling my tape recorder.

I find walking much safer than anything else in China.

Ok, but knowing you to be a student of Chinese, i'm going to attempt this in Chinese:

  其实你可能听说过我说这个故事，但是我现在没有别的故事说。

  我几年以前去了一个中国饭店买东西吃，但我那时候讲中文讲得很差。我看菜单就看到那个饭店有酸甜排骨，  可是我的口音， 发音都很不好，所以服务员来问我想吃什么的时候，我笑着对她说，“我想吃酸甜屁股！”

I took a motorcycle taxi one night and when we got home I discovered I had no money. I met this guy before because I knew his wife. He didn't speak English, I showed him my wallet and said I'd pay him later, he seemed to understand and took off. The next day the guy said hello to me at the bus station and I gave him a 10 and asked if that was enough. He said yes. So later that night, the guy drives up to me and I know he's asking about his money, so I use my phone translator to tell him I paid him at the bus station. He is going on about it in Chinese and a crowd is starting to gather. So I ask him if I paid his brother? Then I tell him I paid the wrong guy at the bus station and all Chinses guys look the same to me. So everybody laughed at that and I paid him a 10.