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Q: Girls, do you ever beat up your husbands?
Did you know that there is no law on domestic violence in China? It is considered "a family thing", so get slapping.'
Actually. I just became aware that more than 25% of women in Chine experience some sort of domestic violence, so look out for the people around you, maybe someone has a secret they need help with.
9 years 45 weeks ago in Family & Kids - China
it is not only wives who experience abuse: quite a few boys i have taught have told me their fathers would beat them for not achieving the grades they wanted, especially in subjects like Maths.
It is the 'right' of the father/husband to do this, hiding behind the excuse of 'tradition'
Whereas girls might experience abuse from male family members, but are told/pressured not to report it to save 'face'
sorrel:
happy Fathers Day to all you guys, whatever your age, who spend time with their families (much better than gifts), give unconditional support, take their responsibilities seriously and are all-round good guys
it is not only wives who experience abuse: quite a few boys i have taught have told me their fathers would beat them for not achieving the grades they wanted, especially in subjects like Maths.
It is the 'right' of the father/husband to do this, hiding behind the excuse of 'tradition'
Whereas girls might experience abuse from male family members, but are told/pressured not to report it to save 'face'
sorrel:
happy Fathers Day to all you guys, whatever your age, who spend time with their families (much better than gifts), give unconditional support, take their responsibilities seriously and are all-round good guys
My wife beats me sometimes. 
iWolf:
Mine too! But she punches like a girl.
When I was an FOB, I heard that when a Chinese girl beats you, it means she loves you. It's not as though they could actually hurt you.
Scandinavian:
this is actually not fun. I had a colleague once who was in a very bad relationship. this was back home and both my colleague and his gf were of the same stature, so she could pack a punch, and he'd actually get bruised, but being a nice guy, he could never punch back. anyway, years of secretly munching happy pills, they finally split, me and another of his friends moved all her stuff to a storage unit a night she was not home, locks where changed and the lease for the storage unit signed over to her mother.
and you know you like it!!
Actually I would enjoy it if my wife beats me up a little bit.
I get "hands-on" complaints about being lazy and inconsiderate (by illogical Chinese standards). But they're so flimsy that I rarely feel any discomfort. It's not a nice way to wake up, though. It's also a lousy way to communicate, but this is China - what else is new?
Punching I can live with. That doesn't really cause much pain or discomfort. The thing that really gets me angry is the biting, pinching and digging finger nails into sensitive areas. That has caused me to raise my hand a few times though I have never actually hit a girl. It is more of a signal to say it is not OK to do that usually followed by a rebuff such as "My god, are you a man or what?". Well, I might be a man but that does not justify physical abuse being applied to me and I am certainly not going to sit there and let someone do it to me.
She hits my playfully and not hard from time to time, it's ok, I slap her ass. Can't remember her hitting me in anger, and I would never hit her, playfully or not.
But the stories I've heard of children being beaten by their dads make me absolutely sick. I guess you never have to improve anything if you can just shout "tradition" as loud as you can.
I've always said, beat me, bore me, don't ignore me.
Local men beat their women then complain when the same women choose foreign men.
hunana:
because domestic abuse doesn't exist amongst other cultures?
Eorthisio:
Did anyone claim that they don't? The main difference is that White men don't complain when their women go with other races' men, the same in every races, except for China of course where even the national TV talk everyday about bad foreigners beating their wives and perfect Chinese husbands who would never do such thing.
I once saw a man beating his wife badly in the street one night. I heard shouting looked out of the window and he was dragging her around the floor by her hair. I first shouted out of the window but he ignored me. I told my wife to call the police and at first she wouldn't (chinese wife). She only called the police after I told her to call the police or I would go and beat the man.When the police arrived he kept hitting her in front of the police. They just seperated them, then made her get in a taxi with her husband. The man didn't even get a telling off from the policeman. As the taxi drove off I could see the man hit the woman in the back of the taxi. The polices attitute was do it at home.
two sides of a coin...
In one case you go to jail if you beat your children and they complain against you..
on the other hand, you get beaten by your wife/gf if there is no law against it...
Only reasonable thing my dull and limited mind can think of is that to not oppress any one nor be oppressed by anyone...
Scandinavian:
afaik there is no law either way. Look at the guy who runs Crazy English, what did his wife get. almost nothing, except the guy continues to slander her in the media for "being a unreliable foreigner"
to my knowledge this is the only case of domestic abuse that has been on trial in China, and only because it involves a foreign women who are educated on her rights
Physically abusive women are more common than you'd think; it doesn't matter who's bigger or stronger, if someone is vicious and violent towards you, and you aren't an inherently violent person then it can be terrifying and degrading.
Male victims of domestic violence come forward even less than women do because noone takes it seriously
