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Sign up with Google Sign up with FacebookQ: How common is alcoholism amongst ex-pats, and where's the help?
This isn't a 'wumao downer on ex-pats' post, but then i'm not one to adhere to this positive spin on all things western that seems to prevail amongst our e-china brethren, i'm more a 'people is people' type of guy; but I have found that among the people i've known over the years here, there have been more than a few who like to tip the wrist. Maybe it's something to do with the adventurous and restless spirit that is prevalent in so many a booze-hound that draws so many drinkers to venture to these shores. I myself am a self-professed alcoholic (those two big old A's in my name aren't there by accident; i'm drunk now in fact), but having recently (a year and a half ago) become a father, i'm trying to curb my enthusiasm for the sauce; but where is the help? I know the AA question has been asked before (though feel free to answer it if you have one), so i'll leave that and get back to the original question: Have you found a taste for that fine nectar of the hops to be a prevalence amongst your ex-pat buddies? And..............................whose round is it?
I would say it's pretty common. The good news is most expats here don't have cars to drive or loaded guns waiting at their homes. Less of a threat to themselves and to society that way. I just hate drunk drivers. And you are right there are many people that do that sort of stuff. My advice to you don't go partying outside with the bad crowd late at night that's when bad stuff happens. The help? It's called self help!
Maybe. I'm not quite sure if there's any help other than the desire to do better for your family. This is China, where getting drunk is celebrated, though most people have jobs to keep busy so they can't drink all day.
You could try asking around in hospitals for detox programs. Keep in mind you can die from delerium tremens (see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delerium_tremens ) if you're not careful, and have no medical care. You need to gradually ween your body off it. You can't go cold turkey without medical supervision unless you don't get DT. Not every drunk gets DT, but a lot do.
I think you should look into a detox program. OhChina or Chenhan probably know more on this area than I do.
EDIT: The man is asking a genuine question that could have dire ramifications if not handled correctly. It's also very relevant to China. Why downvote him for that?
GuilinRaf:
I agree. Not only does it affect his health but it could also affect the health of many others EDIT: I think that the downvotes were from people who thought that this was a "all foreigners are drunks" type of posting and did not realize it was adressing a serious problem here.
mArtiAn:
No, I don't get the DTs, I recently went 11 days without a drink and I was fine. I probably give a worse impression of my drinking than is the truth, i'm just very conscious of how easy it is to lie to oneself about addiction, i've seen it all my life, so i'm very honest about the fact that I drink excessively. Thanks for the advice.
Hulk:
That's good. I've seen how bad DT's are.
My honest advice is to drink soda. Seriously. Drink Soda. When you quit beer, you need to replace some things you've lost by drinking beer. Most people return to drinking due to sugar cravings, so you need to bypass that by eating/drinking sugary things. Not too much, just a little bit.
Now I wouldn't recommend sugar if you have the beetus. If you don't have diabeetus, then replace your beer with sugary soda.
i make my own beer, i just cant trust anything in china anymore, being a drunk is not so bad compared to the poison in the drinks here.
Drinking is indeed a very serious problem among expats and it is very easy for many to lose control.
Why we drink can be a myriad of reasons: being sociable, being lonely, being bored, being angry/frustrated, etc. If one is not careful, one can very easily become a full fledged alcoholic indeed.
Institutions like "Alcoholics Anonymous" are frowned upon (like any other anonymous group that gets together, people get nervous). However, in some of the SOS or Western Clinics one can find resources for help, depending on where you are.
Large cities like Beijing and Shanghai would probably have better resources for expats than the smaller cities in the interior.
Some churches also offer this kind of help, irrespectively whether or not you are a "believer" though for some, this simply would not be an option.
I really wish I had a better answer to you, and could add more to what I have written above. I do wish you the best of luck and hope you can find the help you need and share that help on this forum with others.
Best of luck!
Im pleading the 5th on this
however I would like to add braking any habit is a very hard thing to do and all I can do is offer you my support and best wishes.
my entire 4 years in china i came across 1 alcoholic expat. help, in china? haha
an alcoholic expat won't last long. this falls under the "chinese will get away with it but foreigners will not" category
I doubt that there is any efficient help in China. Chinese people are obsessed with social status, people who drink too much to function would lose their jobs and this would bring shame to their families. There might be institutions, but I doubt their quality.
You can make it on your own. Anything is possible.
The only cure for alcoholism is: Do not drink at all. Forget about drinking.
It is a serious problem. One reason I was more than happy to leave China is that I was drinking too much. And it's okay if you're young and single...fill your boots. Young people should drink too much and carry on. But I'm married and it's just not a proper way to live.
For me it's the opposite - I drink way way less in China...maybe cuz my friends from back home aren't around . Red wine with food, couple a beers a week, that's it. Hard booze - very rarely.
Yeah, I drink so much more here, I just got off my biggest drinking streak ever! 40 days straight of being drunk every night. The only bad part about drinking so much is I cannot remember a damn thing. The way I look at drinking is it does not matter if it is good or bad, it's your life, do what you want.
mArtiAn:
Yeh, you're an alcoholic, bro. No judgement, just wise to face the facts is all.
AA is accessible in China. Do a Google search and you will find AA meetings in China and other resources such as AA Loners in China.
There are also Skype meetings that can be very helpful.
I agree that AA used to be frowned upon but that has changed and has continued to do so.
I am new to posting here so I am not sure if I can receive a personal message. If I can I will respond.
Get help-there is no need to suffer alone.
mArtiAn:
Cheers, but i'm not suffering per se, just trying to keep a lid on it. I'll follow your lead, thanks.
I'm lucky to be Irish, our genetics make us immune to alcoholism. Cheers!
On a more serious note AA is a load of b*llox.
Not justifying the Chinese love of nectar but it is a contemporary cultural habit. Alot of business is done over a bottle of baijiu.
You need help then turn to friends you trust. Alcohol is something to enjoy so drink in moderation.
Luckily, Australians know how to handle their alcohol
Hi, my name is JustinF and I am an alcoholic. Although several people have told me that I drank too much, I have never explicitly admitted it.
I started drinking when I arrived in China (back home, I never drank, just had a sip or two). I started going out and with fellow students and developed a taste for the large bottled Tsingtao beer. We would go out to student bars almost every night and drinking beer only seemed to be part of the fun for me. Then I moved to another city. I didn't know anybody there and everything was new. Living relatively far from the downtown area of that new city, and the fact that my Chinese skills were quite poor, made things even worse. I started drinking 8-9 big bottle of beers alone at home every day, making the bottle collector guy on his tricycle happy. Sometimes, I would even start drinking after I woke up in the morning. At other times, I wouldn't even know when the alcohol was starting or finishing to make its effect. When I invited girls at home or out to have dinner, they would always make a remark after my third bottle. But I didn't take this as a serious remark. I didn't realise that it actually was. I just thought they were kidding.
I gained about 20kg in 5 months of drinking and couldn't fit in my clothes. So, I decided to join a gym. At the beginning, I mostly used the treadmill and spinning machines. Then I started to befriend one of the personal trainers there. And although I ain't a native English speaker, he was keen to practice his English with me while giving me advice on exercises. So, while I was still feeling insecure, I started lifting some light weights with the PT assisting me. I already started drinking less at the time, but only because I was worried about weight gain. I then looked at some older pictures of myself and saw that the skin on my face did change noticeably. The pictures were only 6 months to 1 year old, but when I looked at myself in the mirror, it looked more like I aged 8 years. The PT told me that it was a sign that my liver was being damaged. So, then I started to regularly ask him questions about nutrition and eating habits. I would often repeat questions so as to not lose the habit of following his advice. Since I realised that alcohol was interfering with my exercises and nutrition, I started to drink less and less. The exercises and advices at the gym got more technical, but I was happy to have developed an addiction and an obsession that gradually replaced my habit with alcohol. My ex-girlfriend even joked that she was starting to see the gym as a rival, although I really appreciated when she said that she was glad that I was drinking less. I even bought the Insanity workout by BeachBody so that I could do some cardio at home when I don't have access to the gym.
Don't get me wrong though, I was never a guy who liked exercises. I always were a lazy guy. At school, I only wanted to sit and watch my friends play basketball at lunch break. My friend's dad was a doctor and I would always ask him for a note to be exempted from the Physical Education class. The only classes I went to for PE were during the football (soccer) and volleyball programs (1 semester each).
I haven't stopped drinking yet. I probably have a small bottle or two per week. But when I do have those bottles, I get an urge to double the exercises the next day to flush out all the bad effects it had on my body. I am pretty satisfied with this path so far and hope I can completely stop drinking.
To the haters gang on this board (crimo and co), feel free to downvote me. But before my post gets hidden, I just hope others can read it and possibly relate. If you've found any advice from it, by all means take them. I am just happy that I have been able to get this out of my chest. Now that would be pretty cool if I could say it out loud in AA.
mArtiAn:
No down votes from me mate, thanks for the advice. Where are you from?
I made a conscious choice to be extremely crazy when I was younger. I drank, consumed other, carried on like a wild man, figured I'd do everything to extreme. Never met anyone that could drink beer faster than me. I hung out with bike gangs since I was 11. I totalled most of my fast cars, none of my bikes. Women were just a blur.
When I get together with my old friends , they all have stories about the shit I've done and got away with it. But for the most part I quit heavy drinking long ago. Looking back I don't think I was crazy enough. I never got that out of my system. But one day I decided enough of this and just quit heavy drinking. I think you have to really want to quit.
mArtiAn:
Really wanting to quit isn't my problem. Since becoming a father i've become what's known as a functioning alcoholic. But i'm still drunk four nights of the week and I want to set a better example for my kid, even if I do wait for him to sleep before I drink, he still has to put up with a hungover dad. It's all on me really. I don't go with this 'It's an illness' bullshit. No. It's a choice. Anyway, wish I knew you when you were a pisshead, I reckon we could've had a few laughs. And maybe a fight.
TedDBayer:
You must learn to control yourself. For me it was easy as those higher alcohol beers were killing me. Lots of help on the internet.
http://www.wikihow.com/Quit-Drinking-without-Alcoholics-Anonymous
http://www.salon.com/2012/08/18/let_me_do_sobriety_my_way_salpart/
http://donewithaa.wordpress.com/what-then-if-not-aa/
http://alcoholism.about.com/cs/info/a/aa042397.htm
You could just hire a couple of people (for you men / for me women) to follow you around and beat the crap out of you every time you reach.
Hi,
Ive been here for a year and have been drinking pretty much every day to kill the boredom etc and unwind after a long day.
I recommend you read ´the easy way to control alcohol,´ by Allen Carr. Im reading it at the moment and its great. It explains alcohol addiction, and why people drink beer. I read his book about smoking and quit over 2 years ago.
Now I can go out and just have one or two beers no problem. I feel totally more relaxed, instead of thinking I need to chug it all down etc.
J
mArtiAn:
Cheers, but I thought Allen Carr was a comedian. I'll look out for him anyway, thanks.