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Q: How do I get this crazy Ch. chick to stop calling me?
This is an interpersonal/intercultural question.
I met this girl one month before at an English Corner, innocently went "out" with her, and met some of the other western men she chases after, I had no intentions other than wanting a local girl to practice English with. After a few times of this, we met at an evening coffee shop and she invited a bunch of her other friends to come (free English lessons), I sat there waiting for two hours for them to come, then got annoyed and said I was going home.
Then she went ultra-crazy and started yelling at me on the street. "YOU CAN NOT GO HOME. YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND CHINESE CULTURE. IN CHINA YOU CANNOT THINK YOURSELF ONLY, YOU MUST TAKE OTHERS' FEELINGS INTO CONSIDERATION. THE OTHERS ARE COMING, YOU MUST WAIT." Blah blah blah for around thirty minutes, right on the street. I gave into the BS move (keep in mind that I knew I was totally getting used at this point), waited around for her friends to come, but now I must find a way to refuse her calls and additional invitations, which (despite my insistence that I'm busy) are coming about once a day.
So my question: how do you tactfully tell some Ch. person "I don't want to meet you again" without them "Losing Face" and going berserk? I've tried indirect communication (I'm busy, maybe I'll be free next week, etc.)like would work with most western peoples, but the message doesn't seem to be getting across.
Just ignore her. Dont even read her messages. Delete them unread. Do not answer her calls and most importantly, DO NOT GIVE YOUR MOBILE PHONE NUMBER TO STRANGERS!!!!
Also, it would be a good idea to stay away from that particular English corner....
sam239:
OK, my Chinese friend gave me the same advice, just ignore. And yeah I realized that the particular English Corner just attracts a bunch of girls trying to latch onto foreign guys. My intentions were 100% pure, to try to understand Ch. by meeting people who can speak English. Oh well!
GuilinRaf:
Actually, the reason why I advise to stay away from that particular English corner is because SHE will probably be there.
When I don't wanna meet someone again, I just ignore,ignore and ignore, they'll give up eventually.
sam239:
that's what I'm doing...she's still at it with the daily texts phone calls and messages. At least she isn't like the girlfriend of someone on here, you know the one who threatened to kill herself in his apartment and make it look like a homicide if he didn't fork over 20,000 kuai.
GuilinRaf:
http://answers.echinacities.com/question/how-do-i-get-her-out-my-house-help
maybe you just tell her you are so busy and no time to teach english and i want to say Chinese culture is not her mind.
Tell her you have a new girlfriend who's the niece of the city's mayor.
