I sent this to my former employer under a false name. Everything is as I sent it, no adjustments. Working for them, I always thought they only looked at my picture and nothing else. The company is Youwell Pumpkin English International.

Dear Ms./ Chen,
 
Please take from me my application in want of a position on you in Pumpkin English. I native speaker from England with qualifications include BA (Hons) in Astrophysicsy and teaching diploma from Pheonix University, USA. It is very much my hope that you let me learn English to young children tongues with you in Pumpkin Schools, this is my big desire. I is having neutral accent of USA and love touching small children with my love.
 
If you are needed more details, please recommunicate with me on email address providential.
 
Yours in effect,

And a reply:

cynthia.chen
11:39 AM (7 hours ago)

to me

Hello xxxxx,
 
Good day.
 
Thank you for your letter,so happy to know you.
 
Let me introduce myself first,this is Cynthia,the HR Assistant of Pumpkin English Training School.
 
Now Pumpkin has all around 30 foreign teachers,they all came from USA,UK,Canada and Australia.If you want to know one of them,I can arrange for you,to make sure you can know our school better.
 
In the adjunct,I had send you the introduce and some pictures of our school,if you still has any questions of our school,I would be happy to answer you.
 
Here is one question for you,you mentioned that your wife is from China,so do you find the job for you or both of you guys?
 
About the salary,I believe you had know them from the ads,but if you want to know more,we can talk on the next e-mail.
 
What is more,do you have a Skype?If you have one,please add me,we can talk there then!My skype:cynthia277
 
Looking forward to hearing from you back soon!
 
Regards,
Cynthia
 
Cynthia Chen
Pumpkin English Training School
Tel: +86 13996325116
E-mail: cynthia.chen@pumpkids.net
Skype: cynthia277

Seems I've picked up a wife too!