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Q: How to handle a crying employee?

So yesterday at the job, i made one of the secretary cry. She mixed some files and took her an hour to fix everything. The worse is that she didn't seem bothered at all, and acted like she did nothing wrong. So it got me angry and told her she have to show moar responsibility toward her job or else she would be fired by the HR guy. She looked at me with a blank look, so i had to repeat it to her several times. then for no reason she started crying. non stop. for an hour. I think she was still crying when i left for home.

I thought about it and see no reason why she would take it personal. Yes she does overtime, but she never shows full productivity, always slacking, sometime she would continue chit chatting with the other secretary when a client walks in and waits to ask her something.

It's probably a culture thing, o how can i handle those kind of employees?

8 years 21 weeks ago in  Business & Jobs - China

 
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Comments (12)
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for chinese people their culture is an excuse for their wrong doing ..
if you ask them why they smoke (no matter where ,even in hospitals and classrooms) they wiiil answer it as a culture thing which we foreigner cant understand//

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8 years 21 weeks ago
 
Posts: 332

Governor

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please dont blame china culture. that is personal habits. they made wrong things, they know but they wann't change because selfish psychology. so their will use chinese culture as excuses. because you are laowai (foreigner), Smile

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8 years 21 weeks ago
 
Posts: 556

Governor

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A good HRM manager would look inward first.

Your first mistake was in showing anger.
Your second mistake was in not asking her to repeat the original instructions before embarking on the task.
Your third mistake was in threatening her.
Your fourth mistake is in thinking this forum is appropriate to resolve such a significant matter.

I know you were soliciting personal support, sympathy or empathy; but you did NOT handle this matter appropriately for any culture.

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8 years 20 weeks ago
 
Posts: 335

Governor

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Next time just invite her into the stationery cupboard where no-one can see you, tell her "It's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault" and give her a gentle bum-pat. Yes, she will continue to cry, possibly even longer (if you're unlucky you might even solicit a sexual harassment lawsuit, but fortunately this is quite a new thing for Chinese), but you can be safe in the knowledge you half re-enacted the best scene from Goodwill Hunting. And not a Ben Affleck in sight (thank Odin!)

I found this method has worked 98% of the time. The other 2% I was with the cleaner: she stopped crying and I ended up getting her pregnant.

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8 years 20 weeks ago
 
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it is about chinese culture , too . In china , if a staff make a mistake , the manager don't tell the mistake directly . in stead of it , the manager always first to praise her , then tell her , you are good but if you can correct your bad habit , it it perfect . Or : why not do better about **** ? But , if the staff is very bad , the manager will tell him leave directly . Understand ?

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8 years 20 weeks ago
 
Posts: 36

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You made her lose face! If tell these things to employees, don't do it in front of others.

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8 years 10 weeks ago
 
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Emperor

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I'm sorry but she started crying "for no reason"

Other than some ass playing the role of big man repeatedly saying "The guy from HR is going to fire you" I can't see why she would cry at all!

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8 years 10 weeks ago
 
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Forgive me if im too critical... but you have this high education and position, why do you ask our general workers and teachers??

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8 years 10 weeks ago
 
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PDF I would not give you the time of day with the way you think, you think and say what you do about your employees. You are probably lucky you are in China , because if you were in some countries you would be lucky if you went home. You are the one that needs help, not them! Who the hell do you think you are? I would sack you tomorrow and if I was in the PSB I would deport you! Angry

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8 years 10 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1933

Shifu

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This is the people's republic and how dare that woman not know her place? Next time she shows an emotion, turn her out with the beggars.

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8 years 10 weeks ago
 
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Sounds like she was being manipulative. But that's just my suspicious nature. You're getting a lot of flames so maybe you should apologize next time you see her.

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8 years 10 weeks ago
 
Posts: 333

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i think what pay get what kind of employee...you have to deal it by yourself I guess..

i have a girl in my office, almost 28 year old, still act like a fresh graduate, always ask and ask how to do her job.... Fortunately she is doing a not important position, assistant. We pay little to her. This is what we deserved i guess...

these kind fo employees are so shitty..myself don't understand where they come from. Typical China working culture is about hardworking with wisdom Chinese...

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8 years 10 weeks ago

I like a snowy Happy new year, rather than a no sky one...Beijing's time to ban the cars---the only solution for the time being...

 
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I find that Chinese people get really emotional really fast. This question is a bit old, but if I had know better I would have make her drink red wine. I learned that in China, a bottle of wine makes people understand their mistake moar easily. It's actually the best OTC medecine there is.

And FYI, I did a terrific job in China. I made my minions moar productive, and taught them to enjoy themselves when working. Something no other place ever did in China. I left China for Islamabad (this is the life of an expat) and from what I can see, in the future, Pakistan has moar potential to succeed.

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8 years 10 weeks ago

Getting halp from moar and moar people is like spin-o-rama high-fiving new friends on answers.echinacities.com with a tip of the hat finishing move.

 
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I almost cry a minute Ago for so much stupidity of those secretaries with some questions that seems to underestimate my last bit of inteligence...
They may give all kind of excuses to postpone a work or asking: you why don't you send an email once you can save printed documents?
Because this is an Order, that's why, or I don't know that email is faster? hahaha ridiculous...
So of course I get real angry and frustrated, I try my best to avoid making someone cry, but I see no solution anymore...
And for God's sake, those companies are so scrooge??? it's only mine one?

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8 years 10 weeks ago
 
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A good boss would not be asking all these stupid s moral questions he would simple ask himself the two that matter the most did she cry enough and will she Sue if you make her cry more.

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7 years 40 weeks ago
 
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General

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I am a chinese, I also hate delay work and chating on working time. ignore clients etc. it is really not a culture things, it is personility. some young girls dont realized that is bad habit, and you need to tell her to be seriously about work. For example, I have two friends who work with me together, one girl and one boy. If I ask the girl to do some work on monday, she will do it on friday, or if you ask she to finish the work in morning, she will finish it in the evening, always delay. but the boy, whenever I ask him to do any work, he will do it immediately, if he cannt, he will ask my permition. you see, it is  personilty , not culture things. 

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7 years 39 weeks ago
 
Posts: 107

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hire a boy never cry like me if you pay good enough ......., that is the best choice...

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7 years 8 weeks ago
 
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I had a boss who would berate and demean the Chinese females working for him and then in the next breath try to coyly flirt with them. You said yes she works over time...... I think a lot of people would be surprised by the hours the locals work in relation to the wages received. Anyone can understand when they are being belittled weather it be in an unintelligable language or not. You seem to lack any feeling towards the employee and she probably cried because you are a dick.

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7 years 8 weeks ago
 
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It has NOTHING to do with culture! That is the BULLSHIT excuse that Chinese and So. Koreans CONSTANTLY give! :( * It's called LAZINESS,INDIFFERENCE and just NOT GIVING A DAMN!! MANY Chinese are very good at it!! :0!!!!!!!!! I frequently see this. Well said ywff!!!!!!!!! You know it!!!!!! Customer service is the ABSOLUTE WORST in this country!!!!! :( * I thought that it sucked in South Korea..HELLO!!...China has achieved a whole new level of SUCKDOM regarding this!! Well said nevermind!!!! Typical oversensitive Oriental.

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7 years 8 weeks ago
 
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