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Posts: 9192

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Q: How many Chinese women confess they love you in China?

Since I've been here I've had a few women come out and tell me they love me, I may have talked to some of them only once. I make people laugh, either by what I say on my translator or just by being a clown. My relationship with my GF isn't going well, but lately. I have a few women that either text me all day or phone or show up, sorry I ever gave them my phone number, but they won't quit bothering me. My GF didn't get a visitor visa, I knew that might happen, but when I go home, I want the GF and I still to be friendly. These other women are going to ruin that plus they're being a pain. I don't want to hurt them either. I've been saying I'll call you, don't call me. I tell all the women I meet I have either a Chinese wife or GF.How do I let the other women down easily? I've tried asking them to quit and explain they will cause trouble for me.

 Do you get many women that are in love with you?

11 years 40 weeks ago in  Relationships - China

 
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Not that I am a linguist or can even speak more than survival Chinese...but from what I learned the translation of like and love are quite similar.

I have had women tell me this within 5 minutes of meeting and after questioning their statement it was obvious they meant like and not love...or they were hoping for a reciprocal response from a desperate man. 

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11 years 40 weeks ago
 
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Ahh, heck. Enjoy it while it lasts. When girls see me they run, 'cause I'm butt ugly and mean as a coyote.

TedDBayer:

I don't think I'm great looking, I make it no secret that I use beauty shop girls, but many come to me free, I have one staying with me, she asked me last night if i would please one of her sisters, I've been here 5 months, going home soon, man am I going to regret going home. I live between 2 small towns of 4000, anything dateable there I've already been out with. I sleep with my cats mostly at home, not complaining, I love them.

11 years 40 weeks ago
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11 years 40 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1142

Shifu

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zero, third year in china.

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11 years 40 weeks ago
 
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Should I be worry to leave my husband alone here for 2 months?!!

Hypnos:

depends on the looks, but he'll be an attraction for sure. Sorry to disappoint you. But all comes down to love right?

11 years 40 weeks ago
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GuilinRaf:

Comes down not just to love but love AND trust!

Will there be temptation? Oh yes! However, if he truly  loves and trusts you, then you do not need to worry too much.

I wish you both the best!

11 years 37 weeks ago
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11 years 40 weeks ago
 
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I wouldn't necessarily use the word 'confess,' but I have had my fair share of experiences. Actually I have since learned how to keep it from happening- stop being an older brother (哥哥) to most girls. In the USA I have so many female friends I would regard as sisters, but here although at first I thought it to be a similar situation, I have instead found many sisters in some degree of infatuation..

 

A colleague of mine in my lab one day simply explained to me that showing attention to a single girl (no-bf) can imply romantic interest. So I stopped (mostly). It has worked.

EYN05:

Had this same situation... She said your like my older brother so i figured she looked at me like a friend..someone she can trust.

 

Later she started tell me that she loved me and became a real stalker...

 

this is however a girl i never held hands with or even touched before.

but someone she loved me and told everyone i was her BF

11 years 40 weeks ago
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11 years 40 weeks ago
 
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Yes they seem to have a tendency to do this "i love you" thing very easily. Maybe the translation of the words like and love are the same. But in any case I'm sure your cell phone has a black list. Block them from texting and calling you. Easy doing. Trying to explain it to them it seemed not to work so... Smile Good luck

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11 years 40 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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Well it is hard i find that i am like crack for Chinese women, but what can you do! most days I just have my pa deal with it.

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11 years 39 weeks ago
 
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I am a Chinese girl , this is not every girl ,every place ,most of the girls and women are  traditional ,they do have their own life .

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11 years 38 weeks ago
 
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I know it sounds cool to be a player but is just  a big lie

 change your number and forget you ever met them

if you call it quits with the GF at least you know the reasons were genuine

you are the one that  has to look at her while you are reading the texts from another girl

good luck mate hope you can clear your mind

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11 years 38 weeks ago
 
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Yes I did happen to me many times. Have no clue if they were sincerely in love with me.
 

But there is a quick fix for that..it worked for me...and still works not only for pushy girls but for all kinds of purposes.
I would assume that you gave out your mobile number..
Whatever type of phone you have (except no frills $10 cell)
There are apps that do the job for you.

Auto-reply SMS, 
Hang up, make your pick on the first ring second third, or no ring at all.
no access to voicemail...or have few voicemails..than you play with prefixes.
example China 86* (wild card) Philippines 63* (wild card) Indonesia 62* (wild card)
and so on.
All calls blocked on the bingo...well but you cannot do that because there is one gal that you want to get that phone call from...mobile # in China sucks because there are no area codes so hard to play with prefixes (land line, yes).
Next..
have few voicemail boxes...program the unwanted calls to get to various specific voiceboxes Example. your girl voice.."We are so Sorry for not being able to answer your call. Me and my Hubby "Steve" are away currently away on vacation trip"
or
"This phone number is no longer in service"
automated SMS replies....
you can set up countries, cities (mobiles are less and less effective these days)
Just be creative.Make a white list groups..black listed groups..work, friends, some friends, time frame..no calls/SMS's between certain hours and look at all the options up above.

If the pusher uses another cell... then either block unwanted/unknown calls or create an automated SMS's reply..."I'm so very sorry, but your phone number isn't in my contacts, please specify who you are, and what are your intentions, if it is related to my work/business please call at the following number..******* "
Now...what i mean by this...Have/get few numbers coming to the same cell phone...
Make one as a phony business place with PBX answering ..
Trust me it works like a charm...I have 3 different numbers in one phone..one of them is Google Voice...but it's easy to get other ones..just google for it how to get one,,so many services out there..depending where you live..US, UK, Germany etc.
Need unlocked cell....works on iPhones, Androids, Palm, and BB guns.

Just make sure you check all the apps..not all apps offer all the tricks..
you can use two of them, as long they don't conflict with each other while performing their task.

Xpat.John:

For smartphones, there are apps that can help.  For the iPhone, it was called "little black book".  You could set up a black list of phone numbers you didn't want to hear from.  Those numbers would automatically go unanswered and your phone would not make a sound, but it would keep a record of who called.  You could also add "Not in my phone book" to the black list if you wanted.  It even worked with SMSs well too and a bunch of other stuff.  So, what I am saying is that if you have a smart phone, there are better ways of handling calls/messages you don't want.

11 years 37 weeks ago
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NotGuilty:

There are bunch of apps like that for iPhones, same Android..Presently I have 4 different apps like that installed, cannot use all of them at the same time because they conflict with each other..I pick and choose what is needed at any particular time.
I use this trick, for so many years..all Palms had a super apps..even better than the ones that i see now days..(i mean call blocking, forwarding.autoreply SMS's. call recording etc)   on Palm Treo, I had three of them..i think one was called "lightway" the other "Call Block" the caller didn't even heard the ring.like dialing to nowhere..LOL.
and yes all it was in my log...
 

By answering calls from girls like that, you only prolonging the whole thing.
Cut off and good bye...eventually they will get the message...

By the same token there are guys out there who do the same thing by calling girls.
Not knowing how to accept the answer NO..

11 years 37 weeks ago
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11 years 37 weeks ago
 
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Just yesterday, a student said that she loved me and thought that I was the most handsome teacher in the school.

HOWEVER, she then asked me to give her a better mark. I had failed her for never coming to class. Coincidence? Naaaaaaaaah!

HugAPanda:

LOL Poor Raf

11 years 37 weeks ago
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11 years 37 weeks ago
 
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confessed once... did not work out.

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11 years 37 weeks ago
 
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One, and we've been married almost two years.

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11 years 37 weeks ago
 
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looks like u pumped into bunch of liars, coz it's never easy to confess to someone

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11 years 37 weeks ago
 
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They love your ticket to a green card, Ted. Why would you give them your number in the first place? You're not going to be able to let them down easily. You're going to have to hide, change your number, use that app the dude up there told about... whatever. But no matter what you do, you're going to have to face their wrath.

I thought you were smarter than falling for the old "I love you" trick.

 

I use it on the pastry chef at toyboy's restaurant to get more volcano cake all the time. Smile

GuilinRaf:

Ted, you my friend, are risking a penectomy....

11 years 37 weeks ago
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TedDBayer:

Never said I fell for it, met girls in stores, I joke with everyone, next day they love me, I always say I have Chinese GF or taitai, next day I made them cry because I told them not possible. Most are just women I meet in daily situations. The ones with my phone number weren't.

11 years 36 weeks ago
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11 years 37 weeks ago
 
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Why would you ever give strangers your private number in China? My advice: talk to those who can really speak English! Who have been to overseas. The ones can only speak on the survival level, run away from them asap! Usually those are the ones that only want to trick you into marriage then take them overseas! 

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11 years 37 weeks ago

Sometimes we won't know if the decision we are making is right or wrong, we can only trust that it is the best for us at the time.

 
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Shifu

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Thee and all those girls were drunk and pissed.......and one who was not under the influence but did not work out..so totally with alcohol or without will be.............four............ that what i can remember....but no woman no cry i have to say

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11 years 36 weeks ago
 
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They always say they love me until I tell them I want to live in China but don't have enough money to take them to the USA..

 

This is a good way to weed out the ones who will really "love" you. Well, at least it is a start.

Unless they are the passive / aggressive types. Then you have to see if they keep coming back to the "if you don't take me to America I won't have sex with you." Give me a break. Why is it all so complicated?

 

Chinese girls, beautiful but complicated. What a drag!

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11 years 13 weeks ago
 
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Only three, but I'm old.

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11 years 13 weeks ago
 
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Only one, and I married her!

 

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11 years 13 weeks ago
 
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Double post as this site is slower than ejupitercities!

bill8899:

Does Jupiter hire expats to teach English? I searched google maps but I can't find it. Have you worked there?

11 years 13 weeks ago
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Hugh.G.Rection:

My good friend mArtiAn went once, he says it's all gas, now I don't know if that's anything to do with Pogger's flatulence problem or not, but apparently it is incredibly slow.

11 years 13 weeks ago
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11 years 13 weeks ago
 
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