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Posts: 2240

Shifu

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Q: I have notice a funny social phenomenon

During the social activites, some people like to bully people.

 

I have noticed that most people would try to swallow and say something jokingly back to not upset the one who's trying to bully you or annoy you.

 

So they will not offend others. So I firgure maybe most people afraid of getting isolated in the sociality, so they try to swallow the shits.

 

I have seen human doing that since they were little kids till grownup adults. They call those people who swallow the bully having high EQ.

 

 

 

6 years 10 weeks ago in  General  - China

 
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Posts: 3025

Emperor

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Well, my dear Vicky, if you look closer you will most probably see that the so-called "Bullies" in general select only smaller persons to bully, never will take on an equal in size unless the bullies have cronies with them.
My parent taught me self defense since my youth. Yet, I am not a fighter. That's for a last resort type, when everything else fails. But after a couple of encounters in high school, after refusing to turn nover lunch money, word spread out and was left alone.
But somehow, in Chinese society, bosses behave sometimes like bullies, maybe because they do have an inferiority complex, or think that by having money, they are untouchable. But me, my dear, will not start a fight (will not throw the first punch), but always throw the last one.

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6 years 10 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1263

Shifu

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Everybody here is terrified of losing face so they like to pick on others to increase their own sense of self worth. Pathetic country of children.

Viki87:

Yeah. While in school, there's always like one girl who's the leader and she hates another girl, she'll make the rest of girls isolate her otherwise some girl will get isolated too. Girls just so afraid to be left alone and they dare not stand agianst the leader girl. That's pathetic. As a kid, you could be left alone for being diffrent, for being not good looking, for being not able to socialize. Pathetic Chinese teachers and parents do not help. 

Back to college, one girl in my dorm offended the leader girl, they just unified to isolate her as I can record. I was the one who always go to eat alone, so it did not affect me, plus I was the one who got the best grades. If time could go back, I'll go keep company of the isolated girl and try to help her to become stronger.

 

The petty games never die even those girls grown up to be an adult, they would keep the same petty game going on during their daily life and working life. pathetic how it keeps going.

Easier to say it than doing it for not letting myself to get affected from the emotion bullying, but oh well, I think just do the best I can first.

 

I try to not be a petty person, but if someone try to be petty, I'll either ignore it or confront right in front of them to tell them to stop being petty and grow the fuck up.

But hard to do especially when you have to think of losing job.,ect.

 

But to the two petty girls in my office, I am not afraid of confronting them directly to tell them to stop the petty childish game. Child education is very important to reduce bullying in adult life. I think parents and teacher should pay more attention to it to help fix it while they were young.

6 years 10 weeks ago
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daxigua:

haha, it seems that becoming a 'child educator' yourself Viki, might be the answer to this!

6 years 10 weeks ago
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6 years 10 weeks ago
 
Posts: 4495

Emperor

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yeah, like happy said, the way to deal with bullying is to stop it dead in it's tracks by standing up to them and letting them know your not going to take it.  I'll admit that sometimes that  may be easier said than done though.  Like being in the position of losing your job and maybe being broke, homeless, hungry, kids counting on you, etc.

I mean how else could you explain needing to keep your job so badly that you would crawl around on your hands and knees like a dog?

 

*for those who don't know this pic taken a few years ago in PRC, some store owner was unhappy with these employees performance/behaviour and this is how he dealt with it.

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6 years 10 weeks ago
 
Posts: 78

Governor

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Most of the fights that I got into at school were always because I was protecting some kid that was being bullied by other kids. The teachers loved me and I got away with it most of the time. Just because someone was poor, gay or just simply different did not give anyone else the right to point out that person's differences. I'm still that way and I suppose that I would never change. I simply hate a bully. I see it in my classes a lot but now I can actually show my kids that it is wrong without their ever being a fight. Problem is that when you point out to a little kid that they are wrong in class then tend to want to act out and want to hate me. Kids!!!

Viki87:

Very good,,keep that up!!!! You are good! Jeezzz, some kids are just very mean!!!

6 years 10 weeks ago
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ambivalentmace:

I dread the day I actually witness a high school boy hitting a girl in one of my classrooms, that's the day I get deported or go to prison, because I will not definitely not pay any money in fines.

6 years 9 weeks ago
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6 years 10 weeks ago
 
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