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Q: Is it common for Chinese parents to disown their children?
I've heard a few Chinese tell me of friends who've been disowned by their own parents over things as trivial as them choosing a lifestyle the parents don't agree with or marrying someone they don't approve of. It sounds a bit extreme and harsh. I mean how can they live with themselves? Is this a common phenomenon here or do my friends jst happen to know a lot of foolish parents?
12 years 5 weeks ago in Relationships - China
It is complicated enough so it will not be easily understood by foreigners.
In China, the concept of "family" is totally different from the one prevailing today in Western countries. Here, family unit is also based on the fact that baba and mama rule, and their word is law as long as they are alive. If a child, teenager or man/woman ever goes against what mama nad baba decrees, then it becomes a "lost of face" for the parents, and thus the one disobeying the decree is casted off the family unit. It may seem harsh to you, but it is not for them.
I do know one case of a divorced 37 years old woman with a 3 years old child who wanted to marry a laowai, and baba and mama said no, and she accepted it and broke off with the foeigner. And she cries herself to sleep every night, even after 9 months went by so far.
One of my girl friends' little brother was dating a Chinese girl, who then became pregnant at the age of 15. Her family immediately disowned her, and she had to live with my friend's family.
Whether it's because Chinese living abroad are more hardcore than those living here, or because the boy who'd impregnated their girl was Cambodian, I don't know.
But it happens.
I disowned the twins.
Can you blame me?
GuilinRaf:
No, I think you should be rewarded. "The High Order of the Panda"
It is also quite common to disown children when a divorce happens and the others marry, usually leaving the children behind
