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Q: Is it possible to legally get married to a Chinese girl without her parent's permission?

I have a Chinese girlfriend and we know each other for about 3 years we have been planning to get married so that it will be easier for us to be together and travel together etc, however, her parents doesn't agree on our marriage at all even though she tried to convince them many times. I have been thinking if it is possible that we get married without letting her parents know about it and maybe break the ice later. We are not aware of the procedure and required documents for legal marriage.

 

Somebody told me that for legal marriage a document called "Huko" is required for a Chinese citizen to get married but she told me that this document is being held by her mother and there is no way that she will give it to her under these circumstances. BTW she is from Liaoning province and is about 26yo and a postgraduate student.

 

TL;DR: Want to get married with my Cgf legally without her parent's permission but she doesn't have Huko document. How do we do it?

 

 

15 weeks 13 hours ago in  Visa & Legalities - China

 
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Governor

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Sure you can get married outside of China with her.

 

But as a Chinese person I am afraid she will not marry you without her parents' permission even if she does hold her hukou, coz by marrying a Chinese person you are not just married to a person, but the entire family. Chinese people care about relationships and the way you are dealing with it by trying to steal her will just make situations worse.

 

Why don't you try to figure out why the parents are against your marriage? Maybe she's the only child and the parents don't want their daughter to be so far away from them etc.

 

Solve the problem and they'll let her marry you.

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14 weeks 4 days ago
 
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Posts: 3731

Emperor

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Get married outside China!

Please note that I’m NOT being sarcastic! I’m sat with my Chinese wife now and she confirms that the family Hukou is needed to get married INSIDE China.

Can your girlfriend get a Hong Kong pass? You can get married there easily.

 

 

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15 weeks 11 hours ago
 
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Governor

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'is about 26'

 

Do you not know how old she is?

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15 weeks 10 hours ago
 
Posts: 286

General

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Hey man, 

  Yeah you do need that hokou to get married in china....but it does not matter if her parents agree or not, as long as she is of age.And if her parents are holding it hostage maybe you say you lost it and get a renewal copy or something...but if that process involves her parents..then you still might be fucked. I would look into what you need to get a new copy of her hokou. And if you plan on getting a Q family visa you will need her hokou anyway. If I recall correctly, i needed a "single certificate" from my home country saying that I was not already married. I think I just got it from the Canadian consulate in Shanghai...or whatever country's consulate you're from.

 

Like Hotwater said, you can get married outside the country....but im not sure what kind of trouble you will have when you go back to china with getting it recognized by the Chinese government....you still might need her hokou for something...pretty much anything you do like this you need that hokou.

 

My advice would be trying to try to get that hokou or get a replacement...and if that wont work, call the police and say they have stolen property...the hokou is not her parents..its hers....although that might lead to more shit then you should want to deal with....hope its worth it man...sounds like a shitty deal for her no matter how it turns out...with her parents that is....anyway...good luck man and hope you figure things out in a peaceful manner.

 

 

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15 weeks 9 hours ago
 
Posts: 286

General

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this is a bit more detailed...

 

Marriage Registration in China  

International marriages are increasingly common:  those between foreigners and Chinese citizens are no exception. The laws and procedures for an international marriage are those of the country you are marrying in, and in most situations there is no need to marry in both as a marriage in one country is normally recognised in all others. However, there are a few issues such as the minimum age a person may marry and the possibility of having multiple spouses in some cultures which can cause a marriage to be invalid elsewhere. You should also remember that even though your country recognises your overseas marriage, it typically does not provide an automatic right for your spouse to enter your country: that is normally subject to a separate application and far from certain to be approved.  In the same way a foreigner has no automatic right to live in China because he or she has married a Chinese.  However, starting from June 1, 2010, foreigners who have Chinese spouse living in China are eligible to apply for a Family Visit Visa/Residence Permit with longer duration of stay here.

This article will explain the basic rules that foreigners need to know about marrying in China and also consider some related topics such as some of the customs associated with marriage registration.  

Administration of Marriage

 This is handled by municipal Civil Affairs Bureau (Minzheng Ju 民政局). Normally, you will have to go to the office in the jurisdiction in which the Chinese partner is registered on her or his hukou (户口) though there are a few reports that couples have been able to marry in an office local to where the Chinese partner is living.  It is in the nature of the Chinese system that there can be such variations in the implementation of the rules, so it is always worth checking on procedures when you visit to collect an application form.

The persons marrying must reach the required minimum age: for men that is 22 years and for women 20 years old, except that persons may marry younger with parental permission. Persons must not be married to another person who already has a husband or wife: having more than one husband or wife in any country is not permitted under Chinese law. Only a male and a female, not two persons of the same gender, can get married here.

 

Application
The application is equivalent to a civil marriage in many western countries but it is entirely administrative, there is no ceremony at all. The event normally takes well under one hour, sometimes as little as 15 minutes.  

You should obtain the forms and complete them in advance.  So then you can attend the Civil Affairs Bureau – and in some cities you will have a special section for 'international marriages' - and submit the application with the following (there are notes and explanations after the list): 

• Both:  Single Status Certificate, If applicable, finalised divorce papers  or death certificate of ex-spouse for the widowed

• Both:  Birth certificate

• Together:  Three official style photos of the couple together – generally, the civil affairs office provides this service.

• Together:  The fee

• Chinese person: Household registration book (hukou) 

• Foreigner: Passport

• Foreigner: Notarised translations in Chinese of all originals not in Chinese (except the passport. There are official translators who provide this service in China.

When everything is completed satisfactorily, you will leave – as a married couple!  You will either be given you marriage certificate as you leave or you might be asked to collect it in a few days.

Some notes on the procedures:
1.Single Status Certificate for the foreigner

• The Single Status Certificate (also known as: Affidavit of Single Status, Certificate of No Record of Marriage, Certificate of No Impediment, Single Status Statutory Declaration, Certificate of Legal Capacity to Contract Marriage,  etc).  This is intended to show that you are not currently married. Each country has its own way of providing this, and some countries offer the service via an embassy or consulate in China, so you should check your own country' s websites to find the relevant procedures.  

In some countries it is possible for persons to obtain a certificate form stating they are eligible to marry, Australians can obtain a 'No Record of Marriage (Single Status) Certificate.  However, many countries cannot provide this so you must make a formal statement, often known legally as an 'affidavit', that you are single. This is the way in the USA, please read more information about the "Marriage Registration in China for US Citizens" at http://www.chinaconsulatesf.org/eng/lszj/rz/t42743.htm. If you cannot obtain a standard form, you should draft your own affidavit, if possible using the preferred style of your country, stating your full name and address, occupation and employer, and your passport number.  State that you have never been married before, or that you have not remarried since your divorce or became widowed on whatever date.

• Typically, the next step is to have the affidavit notarised according to the law of the local jurisdiction.  This includes signing the document and having it witnessed by a notary public or an equivalent in your legal system.  However, in some jurisdictions there can be extra steps.  In the USA you must send the notarised affidavit to the Secretary of the State Office of the state in which it was executed although in some states you must first send it to the notary public's county clerk. 

In Australia, in cases where a person cannot obtain a  Single Status Certificate they can obtain a form called a Certificate of No Impediment to Marriage from the Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade – in essence it is a structured affidavit or 'statutory declaration'.

Even just considering two countries we can see there are many variations on the basic idea.  In Canada and Britain the requirements are similar to what has been described here. Clearly, you will have to check exactly what the requirements are for where you live.  Remember that in many countries a certificate of single status is not part of its system, so you use the general purpose affidavit or swearing on oath.  If you are not truthful, you are breaking the law where you made the affidavit, and you will probably break the heart of your loved one when you are found guilty of bigamy!

• You must complete the Application for Authentication of Notarisation form at the local Chinese Consulate and submit it to them for authentication.  You must submit it with the legal document from overseas (typically, the notarised affidavit) and pay the fee.  The handling time is normally four working days but for an extra fee it can be processed quicker.

2. The hukou 户口is the family book which records all important family matters and importantly the holder' s official place of residence.  It is not always easy for Chinese to transfer this to the new city so it is quite common that a  Chinese is considered a non-resident of the municipality and you will probably have to go to her or his registered city.  However, there are some reports that couples have married locally and simply had to attend at a different section of the local office.

3. You will probably need to make an appointment for the marriage in advance, but if you are arriving from overseas and in a hurry, the Chinese partner can do this before you arrive.  It is reported that some offices require the application to be lodged 21 days in advanced.

4. You commence the application in your home country: you can take any required documents to the consulate where you apply for your visa.  You can complete an Authentication Form obtained from the consulate (or download it from some Chinese consulate websites) and submit it to them with your foreign documents. This might also assist if you are seeking a long duration tourist visa so that you can stay with your spouse – it would provide evidence of your intents and purpose of travel, or if there is any extra complexity with your documents or situation they can be resolved more easily at this point.

5. Notarised translations: if you need help finding an approved translator, ask at the Civil Affairs Bureau or the Chinese consulate in your home country if you are applying in advance.

6. Minimum age: Parental permission for persons below the age of consent can be presented as a letter which includes the index fingerprint of each parent below their signatures and date).

 

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15 weeks 9 hours ago
 
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The first thing you'd have to do is deal with your side of things first.  Check what you would need to  get married because it varies from country to country and can be more complicated if you've been married before.  I was able to get things done at the UK consulate in Beijing with a minimum of fuss but the process took about six weeks. 

 

Only when you have what you need should you try to get the hukou.  Be creative - say you need it for a passport or some insurance or whatever, you won't need it for long anyway.  I got married in Shenyang and the whole process took five days, we went in to do the paperwork on Monday and then completed everything on the Friday.  At that point you will get the hukou back and can return it.  Then you can tell the family and let the fun commence!

 

 

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14 weeks 6 days ago
 
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Emperor

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IF she has her own Hukou Book than she doesn't need parents to do or sign off on anything.

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14 weeks 5 days ago
 
Posts: 625

Governor

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Sure you can get married outside of China with her.

 

But as a Chinese person I am afraid she will not marry you without her parents' permission even if she does hold her hukou, coz by marrying a Chinese person you are not just married to a person, but the entire family. Chinese people care about relationships and the way you are dealing with it by trying to steal her will just make situations worse.

 

Why don't you try to figure out why the parents are against your marriage? Maybe she's the only child and the parents don't want their daughter to be so far away from them etc.

 

Solve the problem and they'll let her marry you.

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14 weeks 4 days ago
 
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26?

 

Goddamn... she's still a child! Especially if she's one where the parents are objecting to marrying you! (cos, it's a good indicator that they're not too worldly, and thus, their daughter isn't likely to be either... meaning - she might see to be ok with it now, but once the honeymoon period is over, she just might be expecting some things that you didn't count on - such as parents).

 

Also note - if you've been with her for 3 years, then you were with her from 23... which given the above, really rams that home! She's still pretty much a child. Granted, one who's enjoying dating a foreigner. One who is very unlikely to have experienced too much of the world (do you two live together?? Has she had any other long-term real relationships? Has she ever lived outside of her home or dorm at school/uni?)

 

Is she even vaguely realistic about life?

 

When do you expect the kids to pop, and when will they be seeing (living with??) the grandparents?

 

Where do you intend to live after you're married? (which is probably a HUGE element in her parents not wanting you two too marry!) Have you bought a house yet? (are you in a position where you can buy a house?)

 

Those and many other questions need to be sorted out before fooling yourself that love is a good enough reason to say you're willing to spend the rest of your life with just that one person...  (or to divorce soon, and figure out how to split everything...)

 

(and, on that final note - she's 26 now... any ideas just how much she's likely to change in even the next 10 years... let alone 50?)

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14 weeks 4 days ago
 
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Is it a money thing? maybe the parents worry the daughter will leave them to live in another country, so no-one to care and provide for them now or in the future. They will very understand that any future child/children will be yours and not theirs. You will have your own ways to provide the up bringing. Have you tried dangling 200,000 rmb in front of them, it may work and if not up it to 400,000. If that fail's it's will give you a better insight to their true thinking.

I as like many have been here in China 11 years, married 6 almost 7 years past, the parents from the start spoke No, it has to be China to China, no arguments no conflict I was ready to walk away the next day when my now wife came and spoke OK they agree. She went to they and said if they wanted her happy now and in the future they should agree or she would never marry. Few hours later they agreed. 

 

Getting married doesn't make it any easier to travel together,especially to the UK it still makes it difficult for my wife and I. We have a home in the UK/Ireland and China I am secure. Leave To Remain in the UK is not simple. The Home office as with most things make it difficult. I'm getting an Ireland passport it's so much simpler and far less time consuming. Good Luck to you.

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6 weeks 5 days ago
 
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