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Q: Melancholia.....are you subjected to it?
Whether you're a newbie or not. Do you sometimes get the pining for your old life?
And when the stark reality hits home that you can't engage in conversations that do it for you (or any at all, for that matter), do you ever get to the melancholy?
Become a little introverted, against type?
Stay home when you know you shouldn't?
If so, what's your plan?
And if you don't, what spares you?
9 years 17 weeks ago in Health & Safety - China
Hope your doing well man, its the holiday time and its harder for everyone.
I think the key is trying your best to surround yourself with people you care about. Everything is gonna piss you off here. But trying to have as many happy moments as you can helps.
Drinking less can help. It would seem the opposite is true but try to spend more time alcohol free doing productive things. That helps.
For the Holidays this year I will lock myself in a 5 star hotel and enjoy the festive decorations and egg nog and turkey and try to pretend im not in China for the day. Its usually works quite well.
Cheers.
Robk:
But don't most 5 star hotels in China feel like a 3 star hotel back home?
mike695ca:
@robk your right but in guangdong its much better. In the large city centers a Westin or Sheraton or Ritz is a legit 5 star. Rooms , food and service. They have a decent xmas atmosphere. Im in China man, my standards and expectations have decreased dramatically.
rasklnik:
As a heavy drinker, and Christmas lover, a hotel Christmas sounds like hell on earth. Christmas is a family holiday...all the way.
mike695ca:
@rask I get your point, But going home wasnt in the cards. Just saw them all 3 months ago and my parents moved to a different province. Not set up at home yet. I live in a farmer town, not even a saxaphone playing santa in sight. Havent heard even a crappy xmas carol. We have an oven but neither of us have a clue how to cook a turkey.
So a real hotel will give me xmas decorations, music, booze and a tiny bit of a festive feeling plus a turkey and ham dinner. Best chance I have.
royceH:
I'm ok thanks Mike. Just could really use something to do.
Urumqi has a Sheraton, perhaps we'll check out whether there's an excuse for us to stay there when we go to Urumqi next month.
I doubt they'll have anything there though. Except an enormous charge. Last year stayed in the best hotel in Shi He Zi and it was a run down dive.
BTW, you planning on going down that mojito path again this year? Mojitos in the bath?
mike695ca:
I do it about once a month hahaha, So yes Mojitos are definatly in the cards
icnif77:
I had problem in few hotels in Urumqi, because laowai. I don't think, they'll get you room in any big hotel in Urumqi. Try to book it in advance (online).
royceH:
Yes, good idea. My wife can speak excellent Chinese. And icni...well put!
Hey Mike.....that whole mojito in the bath thing's not just a little gay, is it?
Not that there's anything wrong with that...
mike695ca:
@royce, no its not. Having a mojito While in the bath.... Maybe. But i have a bath and then go have a mojito. Totally manly.
I go out when I know I shouldn't. Life here is very predictable. Just malls filled with crap, hotels and restaurants. For a country with 5000 years of civilization, being interesting and stimulating has eluded them for just a little too long, don't you think?
royceH:
I know. There's just nothing going on and nobody's doing anything about it.
How can they be happy with such an empty life?
laowaigentleman:
You're out in Xinjiang aren't you? I would have thought there'd be some interesting cultural things and events to see out there. Definitely nice food, surely?
I am in Hebei. It is a swamp of air pollution and malls filled with crap.
It makes me think of this whenever I go into one:
http://v.ku6.com/show/qezS70TCSrmvOhghpD1BUg...html?ptag=vsogou
Start it from 2.42 minutes in.
royceH:
I watched that link...thanks. Surprised it opened as not much usually does. I guess it wouldn't have if the local sensors realised that every time George appeared to refer to the US he actually meant China. And in that context I totally get it. Spot on.
Yep, I'm in Xinjiang. The food is better out here....the local food that is.
And there would still be lots of culture to see if but for the fact it's not in Beijing's best interest.
You see, they are in the throes of exterminating the ethnic minorities out here. In the fullness of time only the real Chinese will prevail.....Yes, the mighty HAN!
The Uyghir people are being pushed aside and, as I'm sure you're aware, some of them don't like it. In fact none of them like it. And I don't like it.
No matter, aside they will go, along with their culture, which just happens to be a very engaging one.
They're not even allowed to dance in public in many towns now. And if they try to get on a bus without first removing the beard they've been growning for 23 years, well, they can't.
Pretty soon the only culture left out here will be the big round table of yelling and screaming Han, showing off their latest luxury man-bag and getting pissed on their disgusting rocket fuel while spitting their food all over the table and floor.
But life out here isn't all bad, lest you be getting the wrong idea.
I don't get melancholy but I do sometimes get meloncholy, which is the pining for a melon, in which case I go out and buy a melon, and then i've got a melon. Problem solved!
This might help
http://grooveshark.com/#!/s/Grandad+s+Got+A+Bone/1dxWLz?src=5
The feeling of being stuck in a soulless hole, yes, sometime. Winter, with its cold and reduced sun exposure, makes it worse. That's a natural thing, especially for someone very far from home.
Home cocooning can work. This evening, we out the heater on, it's bellow zero today. I practice simple kid's songs on the ukulele, the cat is napping on my knee. My wife is tinkering on her laptop. We sip hot coffee. This makes me forget the winter melancholia.
I try not to let it overcome me. Winter is the worst time for this... China looks so much like a wasteland full of zombies during this season. The holidays only make it worse wanting to go home and see your family... or the joy of re-experiencing Christmas.
I just try to stay focused on my goals and block the rest of the stuff out. I try to exercise, take on extra work to keep my mind busy and kind of mentally project myself out of where I am. I enjoy going to the wife's village for a couple of days to just get away... but if I am there too long I go wacky as well.
Winter is an excellent time to polish your cooking and playing around with making cocktails. That always makes me happy.
royceH:
All very sound, Robk, goodonyer.
Where I am exercise is out now until sometime in March. Unless one goes to the gym I suppose but gyms aren't my thing. Regular homework with the wife will have to suffice. I rode to work on Friday but just too cold to continue with that. It'll be hitting -30 by the end of the month so inside will be in.
Cooking isn't that simple here either. They don't sell anything in supermarkets that one would want to buy. Not even tinned tomatoes. Wife looked at buying some on Taobao the other day and the Y8 price tag sounded great....the Y250 delivery charge less so.
I could probably think about some kind of goal though. How do you come up with a goal?
Robk:
@royceH
Yeah, China doesn't present a lot of weird obstacles that makes some goals nearly impossible. My goals are usually number oriented to simplify things.
Like if I want to do better my career, I say... okay... I will make X amount this year. And then figure out how to do that. Or like... I want to get up to 220 lbs of lean muscle by the end of the year. Then you just do whatever it takes to reach that.
I find when people set goals they make them too vague and it becomes impossible to track and if you don't track your progress... you lose motivation. Keep it simple and number oriented. Let the details figure themselves out and focus on the result.
My goals usually revolve around health, wealth, relationships, knowledge... nothing fancy. Just make yourself better than you were the year before. Works for me so far.
The cure, as detailed by Herr Freud, lies in humor. Creating and being exposed to humorous humors can often help to keep one in good humor. One scientifically (Eisenstein) proven method is the joke telling- which is the telling of jokes. I'll start...
Why do dogs lick their balls ?
Because they can !!
royceH:
Horse wanders into a bar and asks the mate for a cold schooner of his finest. The mate says sure, coming right up and anyway, what's with the long face?
I am not normally a pretty positive person, but when I lived in extreme cold winter conditions I found myself extremely down. I think it was partly mental and partly physical -lack of vitamin D.
royceH:
Yeah. Was that Urumqi by any chance?
I've been there a number of times now and can't see that it's got anything going for it at all.
That said, we plan on having a mini-break there during Spring Festival.
Maybe, but who cares.
royceH:
There must be someone? If not, perhaps consider hanging out at an English Corner. Lots of potential friends to be found there.
No, never. If I'm sleepy, I sleep (as cats do). If I don't want to go out (and keep yelling 'stupid') I stay home.
On the other note, did you know Xinjiang is one of the areas on Earth, where weed originated?
If 'melancholy' equals to 'down-mood' (I'm Non, so not really sure in Englo's meaning), you should Yahoo-gle 'medical cannabis' for more.
I got 2 pints for my A. Is it 'pints' or 'points'?
Pardon moi, buTT.....I'm in 'not sure' mood today
royceH:
You know what? I'm gunna give some thought to your suggestion. That is, check out 'medical cannibis'.
I've got this ongoing inflammation of the body thing going on and no doctor in China can give me any insight as to why. I did see a rhuematologist in Aust a few years ago and he suggested 12 mths of tests due to the unusual nature of the inflammation. As I was returning to China the very next day I didn't take up that suggestion.
I know the hoochy koochy is very popular here in Xinjiang so getting hold of some shouldn't be a problem. But one problem I envisage is that I don't smoke, and I don't want to start. How can the stuff be taken without smoking it?
Oh yeah, melancholia equals 'down mood'.
ps.....good to see you speaking English again. That'll be like an 'up yours' to all your detractors on here...
icnif77:
It's scientifically proven, smoking heals/lower pain at arthritis. You can get weed legally in USA and EU by MD's prescription, if you suffer from arthritis. Yahoo-gle 'arthritis and cannabis' for more.
http://www.arthritistoday.org/arthritis-treatment/natural-and-alternative-treatments/remedies-and-therapies/medical-marijuana.php
http://www.everydayhealth.com/news/pros-and-cons-of-marijuana-for-joint-pain/
I don't smoke either, but I'm a diabetic, and news was cana lowers blood glucose, so I had detailed look into it.
on a winter BCD i would hibernate with my favourite TV program.
phone off.
Sometimes alone time can be good to refocus.
sorrel:
Band of Brothers is always good for a look, and thank **** for Borgen (Denmark) and Wallander (Sweden).
or some comedy such as Black Books or IT Crowd.
There is nothing in the rule book to say i have to be 100% happy and sociable 100% of the time.
If i don't feel like going out to socialise, I don't, and especially dislike the 'forced' jollity every evening around Christmas - espcially from locals
I accept the BCD's as part of life and recharge in my own way. 
royceH:
Hey, I've just watched Band of Brothers. Finished it last week. It really is fantastic. Did you see the Doco that went along with it? Also fantastic.
Ever seen 'Gettysburg'? If not, you must!
sorrel:
yes, i saw the documentary
a very thoughtful friend gave me the collectors edition when i was at home
I have this and a lot of other TV/films on my external HD 
I'll check 'Gettysburg' out when i can
DrMonkey:
Awww... Bands Of Brothers is very good, but it depresses me when I watch it. Watching those kids thrown to fix a mess they did not cause, seeing all kind of horrible crap instead of dancing with nice girls. Eternal thanks to those guys...
royceH:
Yes Dr....and that includes not only the people from your country and mine, but I presume Sorrels too.
Yep, melancholia and sometimes infinite sadness too 
Stiggs:
I find just the right amount of beer, carefully administered while listening to some good sounds.. clears the situation right up.
Stiggs:
Actually I say it sort of tongue in cheek but it's mostly what I do when this place pisses me off. And it really does piss me off sometimes.
On a day off I stock up with all the food and beer I'll need and listen to radio from home, watch a favorite movie or go online planning and dreaming about my new life, when I throw in the China towel.
royceH:
You know what the fkers have done out here? They've blocked Aust radio. Again. For over a month now. Last time it was for several months. I don't know how, or why. But it doesn't fkn work any more.
Could be because they narrow the band width of the internet and that won't allow radio streaming. Very disappointing because I used to listen to it every day. Really did help with my sanity.
Stiggs:
That sucks mate. I find myself getting exasperated with the internet here more and more lately.
I'm no computer expert, far from it so maybe someone else here could chime in and confirm or deny but would changing your browser help? I once found that when I changed from mozilla to google chrome certain websites seemed to work better.
Unless they actually did block the radio station of course. Only a VPN will fix that.
royceH:
No they haven't blocked the website, only the streaming.
Actually I found a new browser about 6 mths ago that worked where Chrome did not.
It's called Torch.
No. I don't get sad, i get mad. 
royceH:
Yes, that can happen. But don't let that become a habit or else you'll end up turning into AggroMan.
The people here dance to a different beat and as much as we'd like them to put a logic hat on, they can't/won't.
