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Posts: 1

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Q: Is my Chinese boyfriend using me?

My Chinese boyfriend has been living in australia for 7 months. He has made it clear that his family do not want him to have a girlfriend and that he will probably have an arranged marriage.

He is sometimes very nice and he tells me he likes me but he doesn't reply to my texts or weixin messages even though he replies instantly to everyone else's.

He can be very cold and callous to me and he ingores me sometimes. He hasn't told any of his friends about me and often when other people are around he is very distant.

I feel like he just wants to sleep with me instead of an actually dating me.
we have been dating for a few weeks now.
I don't know what to do...please help me

12 years 3 weeks ago in  Relationships - China

 
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WTF...????

Are you guys all crazy??

Hell no, you don't dump him! You go out with him somewhere public (preferably with a lot of other girls around), then deck him! Maybe a good hard knee to the balls! Then yell at him and tell that complete pr1ck off for treating you the way he has, and you never want to see his sorry arse again! (doing it in front of lots of other people will really embarrass him! Laughing out loud)

Sheesh.. "dump him".... what, do you want her to be friends with him as well????

What the hell's he doing to our Aussie babes? Ridiculous!) Wink

MissA:

Goodness... remind me never to piss you off!

12 years 3 weeks ago
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crimochina:

aussie babes should have more sense and what's up w/ people no sense of humor??? (4 thumbs down)

12 years 3 weeks ago
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FruitIsGood:

Something like this seems more suitable to have both parties learn a swell little lesson. -_-

12 years 2 weeks ago
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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
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Posts: 3025

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If I were you, I would dump him like a sack of hot potatoes.  He is using your body, could not care less about you.  That much is very clear from your post.

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
Posts: 660

Shifu

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He doesnt treat you good, seems distant, AND made it clear that its not going anywhere in the future.

You answered your own question. Gotta be strong enough to walk away.

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
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The best thing you can do is break up with him as soon as possible. Maybe it will hurt your feelings, but the longer you stay with him, the more it will hurt when you eventually break up. I guarantee you will break up at some point, so you have the chance to be in control of this. If you feel bad about it now, it's not going to get any better.

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
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the others are right
you can do a lot better.you are youg so take your time.
retreat back to your family for awhile or if you are in Australia go to your friends.
It  hurts for a while but you will get over it after a little while and you will meet somebody at the right time.
smile it will get betterwink

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
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WTF...????

Are you guys all crazy??

Hell no, you don't dump him! You go out with him somewhere public (preferably with a lot of other girls around), then deck him! Maybe a good hard knee to the balls! Then yell at him and tell that complete pr1ck off for treating you the way he has, and you never want to see his sorry arse again! (doing it in front of lots of other people will really embarrass him! Laughing out loud)

Sheesh.. "dump him".... what, do you want her to be friends with him as well????

What the hell's he doing to our Aussie babes? Ridiculous!) Wink

MissA:

Goodness... remind me never to piss you off!

12 years 3 weeks ago
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crimochina:

aussie babes should have more sense and what's up w/ people no sense of humor??? (4 thumbs down)

12 years 3 weeks ago
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FruitIsGood:

Something like this seems more suitable to have both parties learn a swell little lesson. -_-

12 years 2 weeks ago
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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1932

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What an a-hole. Wait till he's sleeping, tie him up and kick him in the junk till there is no more junk to kick.

Seriously guy doesn't deserve the privalege.

kchur:

Ok, he posted only seconds before me. Proof that ball-kicking is the only objectively correct thing to do in this situation. Also Jinx you owe me a coke

12 years 3 weeks ago
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Shining_brow:

Great minds think... hang on, why do I owe YOU the coke??? I got there first!

12 years 3 weeks ago
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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
Posts: 34

Governor

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it is clearly that he is using you only for sleeping.  dump him as soon as you can. 

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
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How old are you? 

Jíliú.hé:

thers is a better way man.

12 years 3 weeks ago
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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1091

Shifu

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Dump him but first give him a Viagra and laxative cocktailyes
 
A real man would lead a woman on so that she did not know that she was being taken advantage of, and would know how to stop it when it got too serious, and she might get hurt he is a minor league A** unfit to play the game and you need to leave him.no

there are better men out there for you just forget about this one.wink

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
Posts: 517

Shifu

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now that you have already slept with him... and it seems you enjoy that... (u r worried if he will marry u or not) .. so continue that.. till you find a better one.... or else u'll feel bad in the transition period.. its a strange feeling..

If you do as i say.. believe me.. you will feel happy when you breaks up with him.. and immediately forget hima and go ahead with the new one...

xinyuren:

My god, your comments. I swear you must be a 16 year old kid who knows nothing about women.

12 years 3 weeks ago
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Jíliú.hé:

why do you guys keep commenting on me when this guy is on here

12 years 3 weeks ago
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nevermind:

That's why I asked the age. "Boyfriend" after a few weeks? Huh?

12 years 3 weeks ago
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GuilinRaf:

They are commenting on Thakkudu, not you Jiliu. Unless you are both one and the same?

12 years 3 weeks ago
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Shining_brow:

GR has hit the jackpot!!!!! :D

12 years 3 weeks ago
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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1911

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Just the fact that you are asking this question shows you have doubts, and are not satisfied with the situation.

Move on. Find someone that doesn't make you question his motives. 

PS.. he isn't your boyfriend if he's ignoring you. You are his play toy. 

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
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Why are you calling this guy your boyfriend?

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
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I'm sorry but I am having a hard time buying the fact that this young girl has sought out this website and in her first ever post is asking such a detailed, personal question. Maybe I have been a touch pessimistic lately but still, this post seems to be written by someone with the mentality of a niave teenager or copied and pasted by a wu mao.

icerock:

come on ,guy, how could this about wu mao business,

12 years 3 weeks ago
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Shining_brow:

Perhaps I'm just naive, but I would say this is the perfect opening question from someone... She's got a chinese boyfriend, so where do you go to ask questions about him... golly-gee, now about Answers on a Chinese related forum?? If I'm wrong, then they deserve their 5 mao! :D

12 years 3 weeks ago
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crimochina:

derek i agree whole heartedly this is pure bs. 


are you telling me you cant see what's going on ? this is 8th grade stuff. 

12 years 3 weeks ago
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GuilinRaf:

I rather thought "Wu Mao" too, except that the boyfriend is Chinese. Just seems to me that if it were a "real" wu mao, the boyfriend would be a foregner. Now then, that said, it does sound rather odd overall for this site. If it were on "Ann Landers" or "Dear Abby" it would not seem so out of place...

12 years 3 weeks ago
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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
Posts: 332

Shifu

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dump this bad man like trash. there are too many playboys in china now.

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1008

Shifu

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From your post seems to me you've already made your mind in what you want to do, so do it. You'll feel better

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
Posts: 43

Governor

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Yeh darling he is using you :(
Hurt him, go out with another guy 

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12 years 3 weeks ago
 
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Governor

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Ask yourself if your happy with him? Clearly your answer would be no, so just leave him. Some people  are just dickheads, and what you can do is just walk away. It's gonna be okay, see your friends more. that helps Smile

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11 years 51 weeks ago
 
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