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Q: Our girlfriends and boyfriends treated differently because they are dating foreigners?

Have any of you felt that your CHinese boyfriend or girlfriend's friends treat them differently now that they know they are dating a foreigner?

8 years 27 weeks ago in  Relationships - China

 
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They are! All my Chinese girfriend friends consider her to be rich because of me, and i noticed a lot of time they pressure her so we pay when we go to restaurant in group. It gets annoying sometimes. To help it, i tried to stop and buying her new clothes every week, new handbags and new shoes. Sometimes, i buy very cheap dresses and force her to wear it, so people think we are poor. She doesn't like it very much, but it's for our own good. Maybe she don't see some friends a much as she used to, but that's ok, because i'm here for her!

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8 years 27 weeks ago

Getting halp from moar and moar people is like spin-o-rama high-fiving new friends on answers.echinacities.com with a tip of the hat finishing move.

 
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yes ,, they try to show exra care and always try to be our guide ..
they think we know nothing about china and their culture (which is certainly not true ),i find them quite annoying ..

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8 years 26 weeks ago
 
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In my experience, the answer is yes.

Unfortunately, it hasn't always been in a good sense. Friends naturally come to expect wealth on the part of the foreigner, and may be jealous of your boyfriend/girlfriend. Of course, nothing could be further from the truth, as most foreigners coming to China nowadays are either students or young teachers.

As far as the family goes, they don't necessarily expect money, but there's a great deal of uncertainty that results from dating, as a foreigner's presence in China is contingent on him or her having a visa, and so very easily one can feel trapped in a relationship, in the sense there's very little flexibility. Lose your job or problem with the visa and bam, you're out of China.

All these factors influence how the circle of friends and family react to your Chinese partner. Who said adapting to a different culture was easy?

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8 years 26 weeks ago
 
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Well, not all foreigner r rich, I think a lot people know that.
I go out with my foreign friends, male, female, we go Dutch or I pay (some friends r just student.)~
It's all about what kind of friend does ur bf or gf has. No one should be treated differently because of other people, rich parents or rich partners.

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8 years 26 weeks ago
 
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It is all a process of cultural assimilation. I recall when servicemen brought Asian wives home to the United States. It was a novelty and sometimes treated as shocking. Now it is all very normal to have mixed relationships - as well as a black President ( My point - thngs do change.)

China, - Shanghai and Hangzhou in particular are quite saturated with mixed relationships. Most of my friends who are in mixed relationships are incredibly successful and happy.

I have had one severe exchange with my Chinese girl friends uncle. It was like any family in the U.S. or anywhere else in the world - the old exposed to the new - nothing more or less.

The expat - especially Americans, do come across as know it all's. I apologize to all of my patient and gracious Chinese friends. ( To boast is a sign of desperation and fear.) That is merely a case of young silly thinking that over time is quickly corrected. I admire and applaud every Chinese who has had to tolerate this case of ignorance but I have also seen Chinese men not being particularly kind to Chinese women who were far and above their superior. It is more about young men being slow to mature.

We are a global community now. I am madly in love with my Chinese lady, we get smiles, stares, laughs, but mostly merely are ignored by those who have grown familiar with the fact that we are a couple of humans on the planet earth sharing one another's company and companionship.

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8 years 26 weeks ago
 
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