By continuing you agree to eChinacities's Privacy Policy .
Sign up with Google
Sign up with Facebook
anonymous
Q: Problems with my chinese family in law
Hello anyone out there who might help me.
Last year i met this really wonderful chinese girl back in my home country in europe and we started dating. We have now returned to China and now lives in Shanghai. However we have a really serious problem in that my new family in law is staunchly opposed to her marrying a foreigner. She is torn since she loves me but also cannot get herself to go against the will of her family.
What shall i do? anyone have had the same experiences as me?
12 years 42 weeks ago in Family & Kids - China
It depends. What job do you have? Do you have ambitions in life? Are you financially secure? Wealthy?
I had problems one (never saw the girl after so it's no problem, plenty of fish in the sea!) and it had to do with my feet sweating a lot. Everybody haz good and bad in them, love should transcend that!
I think anonymous is quite clear there, because he is foreigner not because his job!
I know a lot friends have such problems, let's say there r some family loves foreigner, want to show off in front of their friends for having a foreign son-in-law, but also a lot family feel ashamed.
But what is universal true is parents love their children. Don't worry, if u two really love each other, and stick together her family will accept this reality and will bless u two!
Learn chinese. Try to cook some chinese dish. Buy a house in china. Go to her parents talk tell them in chinese what you feel. Chinese will respect you more than. But just don't give up if you really love her.
Learn chinese. Try to cook some chinese dish. Buy a house in china. Go to her parents talk tell them in chinese what you feel. Chinese will respect you more than. But just don't give up if you really love her.
try to impress her family. u can let her dad and mom know your love towards their daughter. i guess they are more concerned about the fact that u are gonna move back to Europe after u get married with her. so may be her family members don't want that to happen.
Any way Good luck
I seriously think you have to tell your girlfriend to grow a backbone. I know that Chinese people are more traditional and that respecting your parents is an extremely important part of life here, but to be quite honest, the parent generation needs to wake up to reality and realise that the best thing they could wish for their daughter is a lifetime of love and happiness, not a life living in an average flat, driving an average car and married to an average guy you don't even love but your parents approve of.
When her parents bite the dust, what'll she be left with? An unhappy, loveless marriage and a lifetime of regrets. I know one Chinese woman who dumped the love of her life (and her first love of almost 8 years) because her parents didn't approve because he had tattoos. She ended marrying a multi-millionairre which the parents had arranged and now, a year later, she's seeking a divorce and contacting her heartbroken ex-boyfriend again, hoping for a reconcilliation. Is that what parents really want to put their children through? Her parents suck and they should be ashamed of themselves. Don't let those narrow-minded idiots ruin the special love you and your girlfriend share. In worst case scenario, just take her back to Europe and live a happy life far away from the inlaws. Carpe diem!
Hey folks you are advising more grief.
Love is a choice.
Chose another to love.
Girlfriends are like taxis, miss this one and another will be along shortly.
firstly,try to find out why her family against. and then try to solve it.
when u find out the real reason,and still dont know how to do. you can ask me and i can give u some advice from chinese eyes.
Martin1947, you're so disrespectful towards women comparing them to taxis. Chauvenistic pigs like you send my blood boiling. anonymous, I hope you don't take his advice. Love is rare and hard to find. Cling on to it as long as you've got it.
Redaria you are young and have time to learn.
The Chinese divorce rate has hit 50% in some cities.
Boyfriends are also just like taxis.
I am an equal opportunity kinda guy.
you should have discussed her family's views before you went this far.
Oh anonymous, ......................................................................................the taxi idea is where it's at my friend.
You are fighting a battle you can't win. However, go ahead and take the advice of some of the other posters here and see for yourself. This is your life you are playing with here, your gf's family are calling on 5000 years of precious history to make their decision. You, even on your best day can't compete with that.....Taxi!!
Marry her, move to Europe, let them rot when they are ill.
