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Posts: 47

Governor

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Q: Sleeping with local co-workers as a foreigner?

How common is this and exactly how bad is our rep in this department?

Do most companies even discourage relationships with co-workers?

12 years 15 weeks ago in  Relationships - China

 
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Posts: 660

Shifu

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I have known some people to do this, and its never a good idea. First off, the office girls love a good love story. And as long as you are being that committed, loyal boyfriend they know from the movies, then you are golden. But step out of line, or piss the girl off, and they will all know about it... and then everyone thinks you are shit. (of course that doesnt always mean you did anything that bad, but they will believe them over you)

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12 years 15 weeks ago
 
Posts: 5539

Emperor

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dont shAt where you eat! but if she hot with big boobs all bets are off.

LAR:

Crimo, ya forgot to mention the miniskirts and translucent blouses! :)

11 years 29 weeks ago
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crimochina:

god damn yes. one of my students came in with a see through skirt and top with bright blue underwear (panties and bra) 

11 years 29 weeks ago
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12 years 15 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1318

Emperor

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Long term relationship, then that may be ok.

If it's only just to sleep with then walk away, then you're only asking for trouble down the road and unless this is your last month before you leave China to work somewhere else.... I'd say wait till your last month before you leave China to work somewhere else.

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12 years 15 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2409

Emperor

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Just. Don't.

It will NEVER end well.  And you will need to be the strong one.  Because the girls who have you in their sites won't think about the consequences, they will just forge ahead with the possible relationship.

As a boss, I discourage in-office relationships.  Because in the past, even when it happens between locals, I normally end up having to let both people go.  

If it goes well, they spend more time with each other than on their work.

If it goes bad, which it will at some point, they will sulk and get nothing done because the person they had a fight with that morning is only sitting a few desks away.

Then there is the politics of any fight.  People in the office will either take one persons side over the other and then even less work gets done.

Just. Don't. Do. It.

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12 years 15 weeks ago
 
Posts: 3292

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Never a good idea. In China, if it's not in the contract, don't do it. We have enough dramas working in China, without creating more.

I prefer to take as little work home with me as possible. While some parts of the work need to be done at home, the coworkers are not those parts. I think work and play should be keep totally separate, one to offset the other. Two separate groups of people, to keep life in balance.

I certainly don't want to see my sex partner all day at work as well, or have her mad at me at home for a decision she did not agree with at work. I would much rather have her there as an independent who I can talk to about my concerns at work, if I need to. I also like the feeling of coming home to her after work, and sharing the experiences the day has brought each of us.

Also, they have a very Diluth-like mentality here; the foreigner is always the predator, and the Chinese man/woman is always the victim. It is a no-win situation, no matter what you do.

If you need some intimate experiences, I have noticed there are millions out there willing to assist, without having to create dramas at work.

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12 years 15 weeks ago
 
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