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Q: Table-manners, leaving the dinner-table?
When you sit down at the table and eat, do you remain seated until everyone is done, or does people just leave their seat as they don't want to eat more. ?
You don't have to answer me for China, I know people just get up when they don't want to sit there more, no matter if it is a private dinner or a wedding. In my upbringing, this is a no no. I've been to private dinners in Norway, Denmark, Sweden, Germany, UK. I've never seen this happen. People sit and eat, they converse, and once all are done, people will get up. Of course children will, but proper grown ups ?
Where you call "back home" does people just get up at any random time. What constitutes valid reasons for leaving the table.
I am puzzled that people don't sit and enjoy each others company.
Yes, we remain seated until everyone is finished. Even then conversations may continue, but all people leave at the same time. The only exception is call of nature: even then departure is timed for the break between courses. for a more formal dinner, mobiles will be put on silent or turned off.
In China, when eating with the in-laws, I get my plate of delicious MIL food (she's so good at cooking -- seriously!) and bring it to the bedroom and play World of Warcraft as a casual crybaby... oh wait, they banned me for being in China. They swore up and down that I was a Chinese gold farmer. I should prove that I'm not Chinese later, but I hate them for banning me.
Right. I just bring my food to the bedroom and use the computer. If I hear any complaining from my Chinese family, I tell them "STFU I'M WATCHING NARUTO!"
I also do the same back home in 'murica. Difference is, nobody bothers me here.
dom87:
haha awesome
i was there too and i didnt wanna watch the chinese trash tv so i went to my bedroom and my gf always complains: come out come out
Hulk:
Yeah, they always asked me to come out... but I was busy trying to kill Lei Shen with a bunch of bads, so...
Scandinavian:
@dom. TV while eating is just wrong, defies the purpose of dinner which is to properly enjoy the people with whom you are eating.
I think this varies.. I was told off not long ago by my partner (Chinese) because I never wait for her and her family to finish eating before leaving the table. Only when we are at a restaurant will I wait ( I mean, where am I gonna go ha).
At home in a similar situation, as in just a normal dinner on a normal night, nobody would say anything, lucky if we were all sitting at the table to begin with.
Different on a formal occasion or out with your mates, I mean if you leave you are actually going somewhere, not like at home where you go over to the couch or something. Anyway, in those occasions usually it's not manners that keep us in our seats but more so the company.
I've never thought of any meal-time as a contractual agreement to share each other's company until the last morsel is eaten. If you're done and you don't feel like chatting i'm the last person to want you to stay, it would be rude of me to think otherwise.
I stay until I get the bill.
TedDBayer:
The way I see it, the one farthest from the door should get the bill.
in germany i learned to sit until everyone has finished eating
Always leave the table when everyone is finished, doing anything else just sends a message to the others that you really do not want to be around them, and that is rude. Of course there are times when you really don't want to be around them but as my American cousins say, suck it up.
In NZ I was always taught to wait until everyone finished eating.
To leave before then is just plain rude.
Doubly so if you take your food off to eat somewhere else, like the bedroom.
My opinion? Dom87 and hulk need to get a life!
I also think it depends on the situation. If you take your food and go eat before the computer or TV instead of with the rest of the family who is sitting together at the table then I think that is rather rude.
However, on normal occasions with people who live with you I wouldn't think too much of leaving before someone else has finished. If someone finishes first and there's not really any important thing to discuss then why force him to sit and wait for the slower one to finish? The person who wants to eat slow will also be bothered that he has to speed up for the sake of the fast person who is clearly waiting on him to finish thereby ruining the entire atmosphere.
On formal occasions or eating with colleagues and such I think its proper to wait for everyone to finish eating but I don't see it that cut and dry all the time.
