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Q: Is there any dating protocol in China?

Now free from the crazy ex gf I find myself slipping back into Charlie Sheen mode again.

Is dating 3 woman at the same time a no no in China?

I can't choose yet and they don't know I am seeing other people but damn am I having fun.

To make it worse they are all young girls (23-26)....or as like to say...YCG's.

 

At home if people are not in a committed relationship yet then generally it is fine to see other people.

But we all know how Chinese girls get attached and serious very fast but after the last demon gf I need to take my time.

 

So is there any unspoken rule about dating here?  Am I taking a risk?

6 years 19 weeks ago in  Relationships - China

 
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Yes, don't get caught and hide anything sharp. I couldn't even talk with other women.

So rule # 1, don't get caught. You are a square peg in a round hole, do what you want. I did.

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Is dating 3 women at a time not a no-no almost anywhere?

Or am I being old fashioned?

I am fairly sure where I am from it's not the done thing.

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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don't do what I did .... Tanya, Tina and Twyla ....or what.my bother did Shelley, Sheila and Shirley....  it gets confusing.

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Stick with one, or it'll bite you in the ass in the future. You may even get a surprise jimmy-chopping. Chinese women are fully aware of the jimmy-chop method: my wife said if I ever cheated, she'd cut off my junk.

 

I say this despite being tempted -- when single, mind you! -- to have back-to-back threesomes with hookers and/or random girls from clubs. That shat be callin' me, man. It be callin' me. I just gotta do it. *twitches*

 

Maybe I'm just old fashioned, but still. It's really hard to resist Fornication Hulk mode, but it makes for better relationships if I'm not sleeping around constantly. I really believe that sleeping around cheapens everything, and makes it much harder to get into and maintain a stable relationship for long.

 

My advice is to just... pick one woman and stick with her. See what she wants from life on the first date. If it doesn't match with what you want, then move on.

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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don't ask don't tell is the policy.

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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My Chinese dude friends are often surprised when I tell them I've only got one girlfriend, and even suggest that I should increase the number of girlfriends I have.  Not sure if it's a common practice for them, or if they're just stereotyping the cock-slinging foreigner.  I say do what you wanna do....and also echo the above replies of not getting caught angel

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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ask yourself this question, are there rules in china? 9besides not talking bad about the ccp)

 

there you have it,, but stay away from hunan women, they will spy on you then cut off your mr bobbit

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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You've had at least one crazy gf, and now you want three at the same time?

What happened to the new gf while you were paying off the old one?

 

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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I look forward to the sordid details of how this turns out when you are found out....indecision

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Well if it makes you feel cheap....you're in China. Everything's cheap. Enjoy.

 

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Dude, it seems you are jumping out of the frying pan into the fire.  Haven't you learned your  lesson from the last girl?  If it is generally agreed that you shouldn't get caught doing this nonsense, then it's probably a given that it is a foolish thing to do.

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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"Dating" more than one is fine. Having more than one "girlfriend" is hazardous!

 

So, while they think that you're still only dating, it should be fine. If they think there's a commitment, you'd better be rich and keeping them well off and happy!

 

Remember why they're going out with you! And trust me, it won't be because you're just a great guy they really want to be with! (ie, you're being used....)

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Here are two rational certainties:

 

1. All three of these relationships will end some time in the future.

2. When relationships end, anyone involved who is Chinese and female goes crazy.

 

This is an inevitability you will eventually have to deal with. But not now.

 

Live like there's no tomorrow.

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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I think the key thing here is honesty. If all three honestly understand you're not serious, you're just having fun, then there's no problem. 

 

If you're purposely letting them all think you're serious when you're not, then you're being a dick.

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Did you pick the one with the biggest set?

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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please tell me non of them are friends with your ex

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Don't get caught by your wife, girlfriend or both.

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Keep the stories coming 

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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haven't you been reading the latest posts. when you meet a girl in china you better try to get her into bed. or else i insulted her. 

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6 years 19 weeks ago
 
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Do you have any self respect, you don't appear to have any respect for them.   You appear to be an old fashioned prat to me.

Perhaps one day you will grow up and behave like a real man.

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6 years 18 weeks ago
 
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 The men who say don't get caught do not have much experience being involved with multiple ladies on multiple levels for any length of time. 1st you will get caught at some point. If you do not last with your pick of the litter so to speak of the 3, if there is a next time or others reading this, start by telling them you are not sure who your special girl will be or is? Tell them you know it takes time, exposure to different events and experience (not just sexual) to know who may be best to share time with and more importantly you life with in future. Since you have chosen the youngest, hottest and hopefully smartest, the other 2 girls will be upset, disappointed & will think you chose unwisely because if they see you 2 together they will compare themselves to her. This is normal & they will walk away thinking you chose her because of her being hot & youngest. Treat them with honor & respect and you will never need to worry about revenge. Be honest. Please know this advise comes from traveling the world in many cultures & have been blessed with thousands of ladies interested in me over the past 20 years since my divorce. You chose wisely becasue I have learned Asian ladies are most passionate on the planet and I am in the process of writing a book about it! I wish you well! Samsara is right but create the tomorrow to be the best it can be by treating them with honor & respect so when they go crazy, it will not be destructive crazy!!

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6 years 18 weeks ago
 
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Dating 4 girls at one time...In any society that's called cheating brah! Well maybe not in some of those middle eastern societies, but other than that its cheating. How old are you anyways? You mentioned the girls were 23-26 like they were super young or something. no

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6 years 18 weeks ago

There are cookies, bookies and too many rookies for me to sit here trying to be a hooky! Looky Looky don't call me a wooky. Touchy Touchy Feely Feely Spicy Spicy Nicey Nicey & that's what the doctor Ordered!!

 
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General

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Yes yes.. we get it - your junk works.

 

Anyways, yes, you will deserve all of the humiliation coming your way soon. Just remember that!

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6 years 18 weeks ago
 
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From reading your question, it seems to me that if you are having "damn fun" as you put it, then these girls are probably not the most innocent of girls you will find in China, it takes two to tango after all, or 4 in this case. My point being, that it is probably not just you who is seeing 3 girls at once, there is a fairly good chance that these girls aren't just seeing you. I say this from experience, and from having many Chinese girls as friends who have also been open enough to tell me that they are happy to play around with more than one guy just as guys do. Some girls will be open and honest to you that they have more than one boyfriend and feel no shame about it, others will keep it a complete secret and you will never know, not even telling it to their best friend, unless of course you catch them out too. At the end of the day, you only live once, live it how you want to live it, don't let others judge you, if you are happy and not hurting others then all is fine in the world. I'm damn sure that those 3 girls probably think the same! One final thought though, what goes around comes around. So if you really wanna pick 'one', make sure you be good to her, then she has no excuses to do the dirty on you too.

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6 years 17 weeks ago
 
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