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Posts: 2878

Shifu

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Q: Welcome back Almost!!!

I want to thank everyone for accepting Brother Almost back on our forum. He strayed from the CFTU flock, but he was brought back into the fold by The Leader's Secret Police. He underwent The Ceremony of course and was castrated. Spent 30 days on farm duties as punishment. But even though he is now playing the role of Sans Testicles, he still deserves your full respect and genuine admiration.

9 years 48 weeks ago in  Food  - Hohhot

 
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Posts: 2878

Shifu

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You people need to realize the sacrifices that CFTU members make to serve you. Be nice to Almost.

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9 years 48 weeks ago
 
Posts: 702

Shifu

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party time

But I dont know much about him...
a little detailed intro would be helpful

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9 years 48 weeks ago
 
Posts: 3494

Emperor

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They cut his knackers off !?!  Gees.....that doesn't seem right.

What did he have to say about it?

 

expatlife26:

You don't know shit so don't act like you can judge the CFTU or our ways.

 

if you wanna get ahead you gotta be a thought manager on a forum like this. If you succeed you get to become closer to The Leader but if you are dismissed from a great forum you are castrated and reassigned to The Farm outside Nanyang.

 

You can still be in the good graces of The Leader, but the price of failure can only be paid with the family jewels..

 

The same thing happened to all the other CFTU Thought Managers who have come and gone on echinacities. 

 

He didn't get any say in the matter, at least he wasn't nailed to the cross like Grumpy was. RIP Grumpy

9 years 48 weeks ago
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royceH:

They're expected to think?  Woah........good luck with that one.

 

9 years 48 weeks ago
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expatlife26:

Hey Almost came to us as a simple farmboy from Ohio with no direction in life.

 

he may now be playing the role of Sans Testicles but at least now hes a part of something greater.

 

You should join up, Royce. It'll do you some good.

9 years 48 weeks ago
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royceH:

I masturbate every day, sometimes twice, and my wife is 10 years younger than me.

 

9 years 48 weeks ago
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expatlife26:

but that is not fulfilling.

 

join us, Royce. The CFTU is the only organization with the balls (that's right now you know why we castrate so many members. to collect their strength) to call out the real villains in China. Which are of course, the jews as seen here on our website.

 

http://www.chinaforeignteachersunion.com/2014/01/china-foreign-teachers-union-releases.html

9 years 48 weeks ago
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9 years 48 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2763

Emperor

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He, Almost, was Grumpy, and soon he will be? Who knows. 

They are legion.

Yes, WB!

wink

expatlife26:

No Grumpy is dead. He was nailed to the Official CFTU Cross, where he hanged for 3 days before being replaced by Grumpy's Corpse which remains there to this day.

 

Almost was neutered but like most former thought leaders was allowed to live.

 

Grumpy was the best and The Leader demanded a blood sacrifice when he was dismissed from ECC

9 years 48 weeks ago
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9 years 48 weeks ago
 
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Emperor

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When does the movie come out.? I hope Tom Cruise isn't in it even if I would like to see him take the ceremony.  surprise

expatlife26:

Ted wtf is your problem? You stupid homeless people act like the CFTU is some creepy cult to be made a movie out of. We're a truly cherished world power organization.

 

The only movie we're going to make is the one where all the people who diss the CFTU are exposed as being delusional homeless men living in the US who have fixated on pretending to be China expats.

 

And Tom Cruise would naturally play me...as I basically play him in real life.

9 years 48 weeks ago
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bill8899:

You play Tom Cruise in real life? That is sad. I can't imagine having to be ... that.

cool

9 years 48 weeks ago
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expatlife26:

Its not easy but I do it for The Leader because thats what the CFTU needs from me.

9 years 48 weeks ago
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TedDBayer:

The drama is perfect for a movie. I'm homeless because all I can get now is a 35 day visa and I'm home waiting for heart surgery. Only took 3 years to figure out why I collapse. I'll keep my testicles. @Expact, will you eat yours?

9 years 48 weeks ago
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expatlife26:

Of course if thats what The Leader wants. All testicles are kept, divested or consumed at his discretion.

9 years 48 weeks ago
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expatlife26:

All of the CFTUnuchs are just happy to have served.

9 years 48 weeks ago
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TedDBayer:

Eunuchs are a Chinese tradition. cool

I can see Tom Cruise, wearing glasses with white tape and a pocket protector full of pens, a roll he was meant to play.

9 years 48 weeks ago
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9 years 48 weeks ago
 
Posts: 702

Shifu

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why was the question posted in food category???

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9 years 47 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1142

Shifu

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CFTU is one crazy dude right?

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9 years 47 weeks ago
 
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