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Q: What are tips for riding subway at rush hour?
I can not bear, please tell
9 years 21 weeks ago in Transport & Travel - Other cities
Vodka, lots of vodka.
This "technique" can also be applied to such questions as "How do I get through a day at my crappy job?", "What's the easiest way to pass a driving test in China?", "I hooked up with a girl last night, tuns out she is butt-ugly without makeup, how do I fix that?", "My girlfriend never seems to forget things like lunch with her parents, can I make her forget?"
Take your vodka during rush hour in the nearest pub. Wait for the subway crowds to thin out and then go home. If the crowding persists, push your way to the front of the platform queue as you board the train, smile to everyone around you, feign innocence, board, and quickly claim your seat or stand-up spot. Then you have two options: close your eyes and meditate for the duration of your trip, or eyes wide open, grin sheepishly at your fellow passengers, flashing them the peace sign every now and then to indicate that you are their buddy and on their side. Works every time.
go to either the front or the back car, they are usually less crowded than other parts of the train.
have something to watch on your phone. pretend that no one else exists.
definitely chug a beer before you get on.
if you can't get a beer, try VERY strong mints. at least your general area won't smell too bad 
I find that listening to music helps pass the time on subways. I usually choose to play something calming like jazz, blues or classical music. But vodka is great advice too!
Red_Fox:
Your suggestion is indicative of a higher order of musical taste. I concur! 
Just don't. I avoid rush hour as much as possible. I'd prefer to stay late at work than enter that hell. I'll sometimes cycle part of the way so that I don't have to be on for quite as long.
if you do go down the music and vodka route, be sure to buy noise cancelling headphones. There is nothing worse than being on the underground and having your music ruined because you can still hear the people around you.
And finally, try and go to your happy place, mine is british countryside.
Personally, I just get involved in the pushing and shoving and general 'etiquette' that comes with riding the subway at peak times. You make sure you get on at all costs, make sure you get off at your stop and just go with the follow created by the horde. Don't fight the system.
Neglect your personal hygiene. Even if it doesn't buy you more space, at least you won't be the only one suffering.
Chew on some garlic cloves.
Scandinavian:
you are confusing Chinese people with vampires, they are not
I've been thinking a lot about this. What you need is
Some vodka, let's face it, there is no point in being sober if you not they guy streering the thing.
Sunglasses
Noise cancelling earphones connected to your favorite tunes
One of those small noise boxes that old people use to ruin a nice walk in the park. Adjust its volume to full, have it play "Born in the USA" on repeat, this is to try to blend in while also maintaining the fact that ALL foreigners are Americans.
Phone, phablet of tablet with some kind of entertainment. Since you are drunk an eBook about brain surgery might be a less optimum choice compared to e.g. some episodes of a sitcom.
Make sure to get a seat, don't care if you need to apply force, the vodka will help make you invincible.
Cheers. Have a nice ride to work Monday morning.
Scandinavian:
I'd go for one of those transparent flasks that old folk use to drink tea from. You know where you can see leaves n' sh!t floating around. I'd float some gummibears in the vodka.
really Stare at someone.... I Stare at them sooooo hard,,, pyschotic like,,, like I am Dr. Lecter contemplating just how I will sautee their liver... depends who it is and whatever,,, but u can occasionally lick your lips too.. it's pretty funny to see whomever get all nervous... well, passes the time anyway...
dandmcd:
I'll admit, as soon as I notice a Chinese national take a good stare at the tall white guy hovering far above them, I initiate full-on eye contact from that point on to see if they back down or increase their efforts against me. They either become super uncomfortable and after a few minutes move to the other side of the train, or I get some flirty smiles and winks depending on the subject in question. Weird getting winks from a male passenger, not really my thing.
Honestly, there is no elbow room to play Angry Birds on my phone, so this is the next best thing to occupy my time.
Don't put up with the perverted fondlers who bother decent foreign women on the BJ subway. If you are aggressed, well, the next time the train lurches, lurch them in the little brother, by mistake of course.
Seriously, watch your purse. I've had mine rifled at least twice.
A bit more thinking about this.
Play air-guitar. For this to seem authentic you need to replace vodka with something more rock 'n' roll. Perhaps a bottle of Jack D.
Swinging your arms violently in the air will give you some personal space as well as help you feel the old folks doing this in parks are less strange.
