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Q: What can wumaos be retrained as when the Chinese economy collapses?
I think it is clear to the entire world (though perhaps not to China) that the Chinese economy is about to collapse. Obviously, there will be no more need for wumaos to criticise the west, and promote China's glory (which will at that time, if it ever existed, be gone).
So what do we do with all the wumaos? We can't just throw them on the streets, after all the amusement they have given us over the years. Well, maybe some of them belong on the scrap heap.
Is it possible to retrain a wumao, and if so, what sort of jobs would they be good for?
13 years 10 weeks ago in Business & Jobs - China
2.5 maos? I.O.U maos? I'll gladly pay you on Tuesday for a bowl of rice today guys? Viagra peddlers? Suicide facilitators? English teachers?
they will continue to work even thought their salary is 3 months late. then after 4 months the numbers girl will marry kchur to get a passport out.
the malewumaos will gay marry to get passports to european countries. . those that don't will defect to usa, spilling the beans on how china spied and hacked into other companies stealing ips.
Traveler:
But by this stage, the CCP will no longer be in control, so they won't even have an employer.
Form a colony on the Diaoyu Islands and 打飞机 to the tune of the Chinese national anthem.
Because of their confidence in their English writing ability, they will search for jobs in the West that are titled "50cent".
Also, applying for this job title will give them more face in front of their family and friends back home, because of the higher currency exchange rate (50cent > wumao)
They could freelance as wumaos. Maybe they could form the National Wumao League and compete for the World Championship. Some teams would hire a few African and European wumaos and still not win the title.
Maybe their writings could be Google translated into Farsi, so they could do good in Iran.
Eunuchs.
I hope the economy doesn't crash, but given present inflation rates and the state of the housing market it is a realistic scenario.
Just to make it clear, I'm trying to help Silva find a new job. I notice they have cut her back to four days a week
The rest of them also seem to have been cut back, but I don't care...
Carnies. They can be carnies.
(How I miss summer in the States: traveling circuses, state fairs, carnivals set up overnight next to the old factory at the edge of town... on the wrong side of the tracks). These wumaos - something wicked this way comes - could operate the shabby rides and the bingo games and the shooting galleries, and spin cotton candy and dip apples into red-hot candy syrup or chocolate sauce! Pop popcorn! Dress up as clowns and sell helium-inflated Mickey Mouse and Goofy balloons! Yeah, I sure miss the hot and humid summertime back home...
China got anything along these lines? Road shows? Circuses on wheels? Carnivals-in-a-box? (Happy Valley in BJ - and elsewhere - is woeful, so it doesn't really count in my book. No NY-style pizza, hot rock-salt pretzels, salt-water taffy or licorice shoestrings...)
Carnies, yeah. A step up for the wumaos...
Sparkey is too old to work in a beauty parlour so she can run one and be the mother. If you remember she just asked a question about beggars saying thankyou, so she's probably worried and thinking of her future too.
Traveler:
Alas, I think the wumao project is going the same way as the high speed railway lines, and all the "world's highest buildings." They have run out of money, and can't continue.
I imagine at first there will be loads of work for wu maos inj an attempt to mask what is happening, then when the government runs out of money they will slowly be laid off and their jobs outsourced to Bangladesh.
I suppose they will have to join the PLA.
Toilet cleaners, they already have had a lot of practice at shoveling shit.
tomcatflyer:
Not at the moment Ted, because all the shit shovelers are employed elsewhere, but when they are out of work then we will have sparkling fresh, sweet smelling toilets with plenty of paper. At least thats what Hans Christian Anderson says!
Why would they need new jobs, they are and will still look, act and talk like monkeys, I guess it just depends on who they will be monkeys for next
What's going to happen to the western equivalent? They'll have nothing to rile against.
Life will be even more boring on this site. The anti-chinese sentiment on here is embarrassing but at least it makes some of us laugh.
Traveler:
The "China is better than the west" sentiment is even more embarrassing, as there is absolutely no foundation in reality for it.
Silva makes me laugh 
vuducknudle:
amen to that. I've rarely seen such pathetic, hypocritical whiners and don't understand why they don't go home.
Uber, you are a nubie, obviously, let me guess, fresh off the boat ESL teacher or you met a Chinese girl on line and have come to marry your dream girl. I shall pray for you for you are so green under the gills you have no idea the on slaught that is about to befall you. Alas, the girls are eye candy, the people can be nice, the tea is good, I can at least say that.
uberkind:
techezee, good to see jumping to conclusions is still going strong on here.
I'm not a 'newbie', been in China for four years, not a teacher, just a learner.
a good wumao would be adaptable enough to work for any country
Wumaos would still remain. The CCP needs to maintain control of society. 
Bridge Inspectors 
philbravery:
Dam nearly forgot
go to Sex in China on a 30 Day Visa and check out the latest Answers and Comments
I like this comment from Shenzhenstuff:
All emerging countries do it to some extent. It's only the Chinese who are stupid enough to try and do it themselves in broken English though - in the rest of the world they hire top level marketing execs to change their image. But in China they'd rather save a few Mao and get their semi-literate f***wits to do it for them.
