Been drunk a time or two.

Had sex with five different partners in one week and none of them were paid hookers.  This happened on my holiday in Fuzhou. Amazing.  All but one were great lookers too - even when I was sober.

This one time I crossed the street... Not at the corner... Without looking.

Yeah, I'm a BAMF like that.

it's a secret  

After getting incredibly drunk at a Bar called the Manhattan: And very late at night: A friend and I walked from a bar in Shanghai to our hotel (which was about 5 km away) without our pants on.

I don't know how or why we lost our pants, but I do recall two Filipino girls giving us blowjobs under our table. Strangely I don't recall putting my underwear and pants back on after they finished... Anyways, whilst walking along the Bund, I recall continuously peeing while walking at the same time (there was a visible trail of urine). We arrived at a McDonalds, pantless, then went inside and ordered food. They served us!!! Then we found three girls inside, sat next to them, and began to flirt with them. 

From there, things kind of spiraled out of control from there when his wife called him and my girlfriend was on the same line.... so much shouting.. It turned out that the McDonalds we had stopped at was the McDonalds next to our hotel! The night ended with us arguing with our respective loved ones for disappearing into the night and never once calling to say where we were.

Oh well, I heard from him he beat himself in the head with an old shoe until his wife calmed down. My girlfriend on the other hand.. she yelled, cried, then yelled, then we made love, then we went to sleep.

Is that crazy enough?  

Took a breath...