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Q: What do you do when people say, "you are fat!"?
As an American, calling someone fat is the worst insult you can say to someone. I guess it is not that big of a deal in China, but why has no Chinese person seemed to have learned you should never say this to a western person. One time I told a student you should never call someone this, EVER. And he replied, "Well what can we say to express this idea?" I wanted to pull all my hair out. But then I would be told I was bald and fat all the time I am sure.
When some students meet me for the first time, they say "you're (insert adjective of your choice here)" For some Chinese people a comment like "you're fat" might just be their version of a conversation opener as they can't think of anything else to say. I just ignore the comment.
I'm very sorry about that.
As a Chinese student, I think the best way to make the students to remember it's forbidden, is to show them you're really really angry at this. Maybe try throwing the chalk on the ground heavily, or throwing it on the wall, or asking the student who said this to stand out of the classroom until the class is over. Or you give the class an awkward 10-mins long silence. Just demonstrate your anger, maybe exaggerate a little. I know you have anger management but let it go this time and they will remember it's a forbidden thing.
Usually most students will learn this and never do it again because they don't want to hurt your feelings. However there might be a few bad students who get pleasure from hurting others' feelings. The more sensitive you are, the more they like to mock you at this. They are really mean. I have no solution to that either.
May I ask a question too? Is "horizontally challenged" an insulting phrase also? or it has some kind of political correctness in it and is okay to use. Or maybe just the word "overweight"?
I wish you well.
frankbenedix:
no one ever says horizontally challenged, but if they did I think it would be more of an insult than calling someone short.
Not too long ago people in China had food shortages. Most Chinese people don't think calling someone fat is an insult. You should insist that your students accept the values of the language and culture they are learning.
If you're fat and comfortable with it, then you wouldn't worry about comments. Only people who actually feel like they are too fat will get upset by it (whether or not they ARE really fat...see: anorexia). So, if you are fat and it bothers you, lose weight. 
I jiggle my morbidly-obese fat rolls in their general direction. Problem? 
Hrm? 
I have no problem with being a ‘little” overweight ….5’3” and 80kg …. Beer belly they call it, but we all know it is about calories, not beer … I am healthy and happy with my stature
My wife, on the other hand, better smarten up….. I tease her daily about her “fat ass” Féi pìgu 肥屁股 even though I really like it………….4 years and she has definitely grown that ass …. Gotta love the good life!!!
and I do believe it has to do with having had little in the past ..now can have whatever you want for dinner.
Rule #1: You can't expect the host culture to conform to your peculiar American culture. Stop doing that.
In China a common loving expression for a boyfriend/husband might be a 'fat little pig'. Which is seen as 'cute' by younger gals. It's a term of endearment or affection. Being a 'pig' is also a cute thing.
There are also 'racial' issues. Chinese tend to have slim builds (I'm not talking about fat) and Europeans often have thicker builds (again, NOT talking about fat) but for some reason some Chinese see you as 'fat'.
*in reality, your actual body fat might be less than theirs).
And finally - calling a woman fat in America is insulting. If you are a man and you are somehow wildly offended at being called 'fat' then you might need to get a grip on yourself. You aren't a mall chick. You're a dude.
Rule #1: If you expect your host culture to conform to yours (as if they ought to know?) then you have a problem.
You will be pulling out a lot of hair for a lot of years!
Harpo:
I think you made some good points. Thumbs up. This is coming from a fat American.
I am about 5kg over when I came here now 5 under and need to turn 10kg into something more usefull
and I will because I feel better when I am fit
My thoughts may not be yours
I tell them they're ugly and stupid, but at least I can go on a diet and lose weight.
Amonk:
Same here. "I can lose weight, but you're gonna need surgery to fix your face."
If it comes from friends, I smile and laugh.
If it comes from strangers I say Ni Chou ”你 丑“ (you are ugly) but they usually understand 你 臭 （you stink).
I use a "matter of fact" tone.
Never feel the need to do anything. Maybe complement them on being correct. Despite being overweight, I do have the advantage of being very tall (for China) so usually people would comment on my height, which is a thing I would always comment back on, just something not too out of line lik "Yes, I am proportional"
I turn my back to them, stick my butt in their face and start shaking it, singing "I don't think you're ready for this jelly...but my body's bootylicious baby". Then I do a quick frontal boob shake and by then they're jaw is hanging down on the ground and they wish they said nothing.
LAR:
Classic Lolitta!!!!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) I would LOVE to see that!!!!!!!!!! You go girl!!!!!!!!!!! :)
You can say 'lose some weight' instead of saying you are fat. Maybe 'cut down on those calories after 9pm'. Or Lay off the twinkies for awhile. (
!
He he, I said: "calories"!
TedDBayer:
Sparkey never hears that, you're stupid for sure, probably ugly and we can only imagine what IT smells like.
"As an American, calling someone fat is the worst insult you can say to someone."
BS: you're a pervert. you're gay (if you're not gay, if you are gay there is nothing wrong with it)
you have to understand that you have stepped into another country where they do things differently. and in china they are openly rude. if it is a friend or student i teach them not to say it (it does not bother me at all) strangers who the puck cares. i ignore ignorant people. if you are overly sensitive china is not the place for you
BeholdaPaleHorse:
Hate to break it to ya but btw look outside you are not in Ahmericuh
frankbenedix:
Calling some one a pervert is an big insult, calling some one gay is barely an insult. Unless you live in Mississippi is suppose.
I say "more cushin' for the pushin'" whatever the hell that means.
I usually say "I'm not fat, i'm big if you know what i mean 
" lol
Dutch openness but if you are fat, why people can not say that? And also if you are fat, why bother if someone says it to you. Better honest than fake is my opinion.
t91camp:
They want to live in a world where people pretend they aren't fat 
I don't say anything. I just treat it with the disdain that it deserves. There are plenty of other things in China that wind me up more.
Honestly, it just cracks me up. The matter-of-fact way that Chinese talk about fat, acne, height, coloring exc...subjects you can never just say in Western culture comes across as more humorous to me than offensive.
Most of the time I ignore it. However, when I am in a store to try on some clothes and they do not have my size and they tell me 'you are fat' - which I am not at all - I will not buy anything and tell them 'mud horse'.
Rin:
Yeah, it's ridiculous when you walk in a store, they look you up and down and just say 'meiyou'
I actually like it! There is an honesty in it! They call each other fat as well, it not said to insult, but as fact. I was a bit overweight when I got here, and was called fat, now I have dropped it and they say, you used to be fat, but not anymore! So swings and roundabouts!
If they were to say it (which I've never experienced in China tbh) I would have to answer 'correct', and I would probably add 'but it's all paid for'. I have a bmi of 26.7 so I AM fat.
Actually it is not impolite to say somebody is fat in China,especially the one is male,though there are more and more girls don't like to be said as fat now.Up to now,nobody have said these words to me,but if one day they say so,i will just give them a smile.
frankbenedix:
if it is not impolite, why do they tell you, you need to lose weight. If I am fat, and I need to change (by losing weight) then you are saying that "there is something wrong with you, you are fat"
What is more disturbing is when a fat, middle aged Chinese male plonks himself on a chair in the restaurant you are eating in and then pulls up his shirt to expose his ugly girth (before rolling up his trousers to look even more vile).
i dont like it how chinese store asisstants tel you that your ＇too fat to try an item of clothing on＇
