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Q: What has been you best conversation with a taxi driver?
One spends a lot of time in taxis in this country. Sometimes they say nothing to you, sometimes that spit out the window, sometimes they ask you 'where you from', 'what you do?' 'how much you make?' and 'husband? boyfriend?' and then don't say anything else. And other times they are hilarious and interesting and you actually have a conversation. What is the best thing a taxi driver has ever said to. Yesterday I got, 'You're fat, but its good, its winter' and last week one asked if we ever took drugs and did we fancy having some heroin (we quickly exited the vehicle).
What has been a memorable conversation, line with a taxi driver?
Slow the f*ck down or I am getting out you idiot!
Scandinavian:
yeah, I've had that one too. At some point I considered learning how to say "thank you for driving nicely" in Mandarin, but then realized I would never need to say that.
The one that sticks in my mind is when traveling with my wife and her girlfriend from a night out.. The Driver asked my wife > Why little Sister do you marry a Foreigner? Before the wife could answer I told him because I have a Big D**k !!
then for the next 10 minutes her friend kept asking my wife if it was true 
. And that is how I ended up with the large bump on the back of my head
One taxi driver had a conversation with me about the EPL in English.
He knew more about it than I did, I don't really follow the football!
all of 'em... I love spending 20 minutes having conversation.. I'm rambling on in Anglais,, they are rambling on in guangdonghua,,, neither of us knows what the fck either of us are talkin' about... classic... luv it.. 
except when I don't wanna chat,, I sit in the back...
4th tier city...., so the taxi drivers don't speak a lick of English, and my Chinese is pretty basic. So the conversation consists of where I'm from, how long I've been here, left turn, right turn, keep straight, stop. Same thing, everytime....which isn't too often. Thank god for cheap Chinese cars 
hiddenjelly:
Even in first tier cities they don't speak ANY English aside from a loud and over-enthusiastic HELLO!
Actually i've had my best conversations with taxi drivers, I think it's because they have more experience of talking to foreigners than most and so are a little quicker at picking up on the concept of dumbing down and pacing your speech to suit someone who in all likelihood is not super fluent in Chinese. When i'm with my wife they always ask her where i'm from. She either says (in Chinese) "Ask him yourself" or "He's from Russia / the Antarctic" or whichever place comes to mind. This is always a good time to make up one of our fake languages. Always a bit of fun. "Hurgle hurgle hurgle plop spinach plop, ganglappersnitchtiboot nipple-split b-doinggggg!"
One driver told me he had met a friend of mine, insisted that he was a friend of mine and I must know him because he was also a foreigner. Anyway he went on to say that my 'friend' was very black and had really long fingers that looked like chopsticks! 
I have one typical conversation that I've always had with Taxi drivers and Chinese people in general. The man asks me
- "where are you from ?"
- Tunisia.
- Ohhhh.... (As if he knows exactely where it is.)
- You know it ?
- No. Where is it ?
- In north Africa. It's a Mediterranean country. (As soon as he notices "Africa", he says:)
- Oh.. How come you're not "black" ? (and then I have to explain 
- In North Africa we're "Arabs", we're not black. (Then comes the second typical question:)
- "So you speak African ?" (And here's my typical answer:)
- "So you're in Asia, you speak Asian ?".
Usually, they smile.. Or sometimes they get offended. I don't really care. Chinese people need to cultivate themselves.
A friend, his Chinese gf, and I got in a taxi in Suzhou and were headed out to bar street. I was teasing my friend in a good natured way and the taxi driver who appeared to be in his early 50s was taking all in. About ten minutes into the ride I really got my buddy good with a stinging comment and the taxi driver burst out laughing. I was in the front seat and looked over at him and he said in very good English, "That's some funny shit". He went on to tell us he had studied in the states during high school, but returned to China to attend University and stayed.
