By continuing you agree to eChinacities's Privacy Policy .
Sign up with Google
Sign up with Facebook
Q: What kind of human being they are?
After finishing shopping in city shop,I fell down from the stair outside of the shop.I felt so painful but I quickly stood up.But I barely can walk because of pain.Many people saw it but they just walked by without even came to help me nor asking me if I was doing well.I sat besides of the stair for a while until my pain gone then I walked back to home.
I have been told on numerous occasions that "Chinese people are very polite" and "Chinese people are very kind".
So the people who ignored you must have been... Japanese? Mongolian? Who knows.
laowaigentleman:
Those are slogans they learn in politics class at school. They're said over and over again to create a soporific effect, hence their inability to cite any practical examples to back up the innumerable gaseous bromides which they churn out.
Strawberry66:
Those people probally just everywhere.I had met cold people from diffrent countries too. They should go live in a new country and perform their selfish and cold life together.When they have problem and know ppl.come to help,they will know how is that feel and they wi learn how to be a human being. Even my dog came to welcome me to back to home everyday when I came back from school when I was in high school.
Mateusz:
It's much easier to tell everyone how polite and civilized you are, than to actually be polite and civilized.
Hope you're feeling better
question for you....if you'd seen someone like you fall, would you have stopped to help?
maggiegirly:
In Australia,Yes I definately will
In China,I'd really love to , at the same time, getting in trouble is the last thing I wanna do,it's really sad
Hotwater:
That's what I see as part of the problem. People are scared of helping in case they get accused of causing the problem.
Strawberry66:
Thanks Hotwater.I feel better now just my waist feels a bit pain when I touch it today.To answer your question:If I saw someone fell,I would rush to help without even hesitate. Last night I sat besides the stair feeling sad and angry.Those people are just so cold,they live a life without a human soul. Actually before I came to shop last night,I just helped one lady in French concession. @Maggie,it is very pathetic to see people become cold and selfish.What we can do is keeping our human soul even the people around us may start losing it.
I hope u r feeling better too. Yes, I would go to help. That is how I was raised. I have been injured before and I have had people come to me to help me and let me tell u it can make all the difference in the world! (emotionally as well as physically)
I agree with u that it is a basic component of the Human Soul; that is empathy, sympathy, caring, and helping if able.
Strawberry66:
Puddy feels very warm to hear your words and at least I know this world still have some human has the souls.
If you ever watch the " stupid car crash" videos online, Chinese drivers just try to get around any incidents, even if they caused it. In any other country other people always stop to help.
The simple reason as to why no-one helped you, is becasue the Chinese have lost all sense of right and wrong. There are numerous stories of people being extorted for money, after they helped someone up from the ground and then the so called "injured" person claimed that they hurt them or something else.
Not long ago, there was another case of a foreigner being extorted by a woman for money because she claimed he hit her with his scooter.
When I first arrived in China, I would always do good deeds. Sadly to say, now, if I saw you lying there, I would walk past without batting an eye lid.
I was in a very upmarket hot spring in Yangshuo county once with my GF, when I saw a Chinese guy got in trouble and fainted. Could have been a heart attack. I wanted to assist, but was physically held back by my GF, who said people do this to scam others. This guy was really in trouble and I couldn't believe that he was left for his friends to take care of.
Strawberry66:
Should us stop helping people who are in need just because we have been cheated and blackmailed by a few people?
mike695ca:
Physically held back by your girlfriend??? Are you a spirit?? Benjamin Button??? Anyone who claims they wanted to help but was held back by their GF is either Chinese or have been in China for too long and her aguments that it could he a scam worked on you. You just didnt want to help because your just as cold as the Chinese. Own it man.
laowaigentleman:
I think he means he just responded to her admonition not to assist the guy. There is a difference between literal and figurative language, just as there's a difference between your and you're as well as there, their and they're.
You'll get there one day. Just stop jumping the gun and thinking you know everything when you haven't even got the basics down.
mike695ca:
Actually laowaigentlewoman the word " physically" is there, do ya see it?? Isnt that a pretty big clue hes using litteral language?? Ya see thats how it works, people write things and others respond. If ya dont like it you can choke on a bowl of dicks. Figures youd defend a coward. You guys usually work in groups. Actually i have a feeling you guys are one in the same. Both living embodiments of hypocrisy. He calls out chinese for not helping while plainly admitted he just watched, you call out rich people for being ass kissing no skilled blah blah blah while at the same time smiling at them as you usher their kids into your class and live off of their money. 2 peas in a pod you are.
yongge:
whoa guys, no I am not cold hearted at all. Just spent enough time in China to be doubtful. If I was on my own, I would have assisted without batting an eyelid, but when somebody who knows what is happening tells you not to, you start doubting. Anyway, the guy was OK after a while, but I could have scored some mianzi, or maybe not... And Mike, while I said "physically", it was meant figuratively. You see, literally can have a figurative meaning too
Strawberry66:
Yonge,I don't think your girlfriend is good quality even you may hate to hear it.
She is afraid to help people.Scam,how can she know?Then why she refuse to help?
Just an excuse for being cold.
Honesty,Vicky I am very sorry to hear that. I, personally, would have helped you because it would be the right thing to do. A lot of us say negative things about Chinese people because of this or that... but seeing someone who needs helps and not helping them, is quite frankly, inhumane.
I don't care how rich someone is, or what clothes they are wearing... if a person sees someone in need and does NOT help them... then they are lower than pond scum on my list.
Honor and self-respect (NOT FACE) are worth far more than money.
Stiggs:
I fully agree, or I used to, or I still do but I feel like China makes it hard or even dangerous to think like that.
To be honest I just hope I'm not in a situation before I leave China where I have to decide if I'll get involved if I see something.
I would have helped back home, but not in China, there are too many stories of fake injuries scams. It might be a real injury but I wouldn't take the risk to get extorted.
I've twice tried to break up fights where it was more than one on one. Both times I've been shepherded away in order not to stop the violence. In one case it was two men v a woman while others stood by watching. The others only seemed worried that my actions would stop the show so they tried really hard to keep me blocked out.
The big problem with China is that there are just too many arseholes, and therein lies the answer to your question.
mike695ca:
Thats really the answer to every china related problem right there. 80% are stupid assholes ruining it for everyone else.
Strawberry66:
A Chinese girl used to call me bad name and humilated me (She told me to leave white guys alone because she doesn't want white guys around where she lives to like me when everytime I showed up there to look for a bf)and I was crying after she called me slut.All the westerners and Chinese did not help me when she kept hurting my feeling and I was crying.Latter after her friends took her away, my nose stared running blood after being crying.Then I never went there to look for a bf again as I saw the white men's quality in that place are not good after the bad drama the girl caused.Many white men like my looking and they always look at me, but if I am not their gf they would never help.I would never date with a guy who has no soul no matter how handsome he is. My conclusion is those assholes are just everywhere in the world and they would never help the one who is suffering.
Eorthisio:
As the saying goes "You get what you spread", I know many long term expats who went from being caring people to being soulless machines, only here however and only with Chinese people, they are still caring when back in their home country, they only learned how things work in China. If local people showed compassion, care and open mind, expatriates would not be forced to become sociopaths (sort of) just not to be stepped upon or taken advantage of by arseholes. In some cities/areas in China as a foreigner showing any sign of weakness will get you into troubles, whether it is with groups of Chinese youth who are looking to mess up with the laowai or scammers whose favorite targets are the lost foreigners. Your nose bleeding and crying weren't fake but no one can be sure about that, scammers are everywhere and very creative to extort money from expatriates and tourists.
I got burned on a minor scale a few times by doing people favors, and then being taken advantage of.
I saw it happen on a much bigger scale to two different members of my ex girlfriend's family, again to a friend of a friend who was bankrupted along with his wife and daughter by his 'best friend' and yet again to a guy I worked with. You see it in the news all the time.
Every time it can be traced back to greed , opportunism and not giving a shit about anyone else as long as you can profit somehow.
I know it's not fair not judge a people by a few bad examples and of course not everyone is like that but I can't help thinking that if people will happily do this to their friends and family what chance does a stranger trying to help have if someone sees a way to extort some money somehow.
Before, I always thought I would help someone if I saw them in real need, and I like to think I still would in a lot of cases but when you know that there is a chance that the person you help could turn on you and ruin your life and not even see it as being a bad thing... well you can see why people don't get involved.
Guys...Attention here.After reading all these posts, and see how civilized and good values chinese have, My question is.Is it possible for foreigners to make friends with chinese?
mike695ca:
Yes. For two reasons. 1: i feel that around 80% are this way. Which leaves around 20% which are completely normal , intelligebt, compassionate people that are suffering like the rest of us. 2: Chinese dont USUALLY seem so cold and callous once they actually meet each other. Many are perfectly capable of turning on that politness switch when friends are around. I have a wonderful group of extremely close chinese friends. We do pretty much everything together. And yes i do think about wether or not that switch is turned to " farmer" when im not around. But in 5 or 6 years i have witnessed nothing. We are like family and we always do everything we can to help each other. Id trust them with my money, family or my life without thinking twice
frvioque:
I can't share the same opinion as you have. After living in china more than 6 years I can't trust most of chinese and if some of them want to make friends with me it's just because some benefit. For sure not all chinese are like that, but most of chinese just try to get some benefit in some way.
RiriRiri:
It's mostly circle dependent. In some circles, you might simply never meet anyone worth meeting. In others, you might have chances. All of my friends are either Hong Kongese, studied in Hong Kong at some point, or are "natives" from Guangdong's historical cities (Guangzhou, Foshan). What they have in common isn't wealth and not even their academic education level, it's more a specific lifestyle and a limited exposure to brainwashing. As mike said, they're suffering too.
coineineagh:
Chinese are generous to those they think matter. If you dress well, drive a nice car, seem like an "impotent possum", then the people you meet will seem like pinnacles of sophistication. They want to be your friend, will shower you with gifts, all because their appearance in your eyes matters to them. As soon as you're not there, they revert back to their "farmer" ways. You can easily test a person's character by trying to discuss socially relevant issues: Politics, social inequality, pollution, etc. It helps if you're not an a-hole with a-hole opinions, otherwise you might not recognise how corny their opinions are. "Too many people in China", "Government bad" and stupid stuff like that. Girls sometimes cut off with "these words make me dizzy." Hence the expression 'dizzy b*tch'.
Chinese people dread liability and risk for anything. I still remember the little girl in Guangzhou who got hit by a car and was left bleeding in the street for 20 minutes before someone even called an ambulance!
Strawberry66:
It sucks.This girl could even die.
Hey buddy.I don't think it is only Chinese are cold.I have met lots of western cold people in Shanghai too.
