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Q: What qualifies a person to be a LBH?
You have to admit, a lot of foreigners here are losers.
But many are not!
How can you tell if a person is a LBH or not?
"Loser back home" is a label affixed to an expatriate who was a loser in his home country and attempts to craft a new, more glamorous and interesting identity for himself in his new country of residence where no one knows him and the locals are unable to read the cultural signs which mark him as a loser. This often entails knavery, clumsy seductions of local women, public intoxication, and generally shameful behaviour that tarnishes the reputations of all the LBH's fellow expats, causing them to be viewed forever after with suspicion and distaste. Like an alien entering into our atmosphere, we would be captivated by it's differences and oddities, but far from our minds would be the label of a loser no matter how different they seemed.
An LBH is a "special" type of person that just doesn't quite fit in. Back home, they may have been teased, out-cast and shunned and either didn't know how or want to change their behaviour, to be able to socialize on a day-to-day basis with others. This is why so many LBH's flock to China because they are accepted for who they are and not judged and shunned as they would be back in our culture. Their impoliteness, loud mannerisms, overstated opinions and general know-it-all attitude would still make it a difficult process to attain the label of 'loser' in China, but like with any alien, one person will eventually step forward to learn more. It's when you are another Westerner meeting this type of weirdo guy or girl, in China, that you can recognize the social awkwardness and gag reflex behaviours they provoke, and safely look into their eyes (if you can manage this) and think that's an LBH in the flesh!
For those of us who don't possess a finely tuned LBH-radar, here are just a few ways to spot one:
-
Never had a successful career – has moved from place to place and job to job (train wreck to train wreck)
-
Doesn't have a stable family life – often has left a string of broken dysfunctional relationships and a number of children to different partners and has not contributed to the financial support of them (train wreck to train wreck)
-
Is in China because he couldn't make anything of himself in [insert western country name]
-
Lacks self-awareness
-
Has delusions of grandeur (e.g. thinks himself a misunderstood genius)
-
Invents an exciting and interesting background story about his life at home (that doesn't make sense on closer inspection)
-
Indignant/angry/violent when details of his back-story are questioned or discovered to be obviously false
-
Expert on China and all things Chinese (likely to live in a western style gated community, drinks and eats almost exclusively in western style bars and restaurants, has probably never been more than one hour from home-base)
-
Expert on foreign politics, Chinese politics and anything newsworthy and will argue his opinion whether you want to hear it or not.
-
Believes themselves to be untouchable and above the law (I'm an [insert country], they can't do anything to me/I know [insert title of local official they met once])
Dear friends, if you know an LBH or meet one (oh the humanity), smile, agree with everything they say then politely excuse yourself and get the hell away from them. Should you develop a relationship you will be automatically assumed to also be an LBH and when something bad does inevitably occur you will also go down with them.
(Some of this is copied from others and some is original content. This is the internet after-all.)
coineineagh:
A bit of confirmation bias there. Basically you are encouraging people to form their opinion based on firdt impression, avoid any perceived 'strangeness'. Then once the opinion is formed, it must not be checked because all contact must be avoided due to possible violence. There are tons of interesting people who would be avoided this way, and only the well-adjusted boring farts would make it through screening. The warning-signal checklist just encourages mistrustfulness. Before long, you will be reduced to a consumer unit like the rest of China. Identifying an LBH should be done on clear evidence, not on vague impressions and hunches. I've met people who avoided me after one encounter based on minimal info (example: I'm learning to drive after 30), and I'm sure I'm not missing much. You can often read their face like a book, and hear the slow grinding of gears emanating from their earholes. If you listen closely.
iWolf:
You are thinking too much. I certainly didn't think too much when writing it.
That hastily thrown together pile of bollocks is loaded with ill-concieved generalisations, brash stereotypes and more than a few nips of pisstaking.
coineineagh:
Granted. But my remarks are in response to it, not you personally. I have never understood the think-too-much expression.
iWolf:
Thinking too much, to me, refers to over analysing something that doesn't merit analysis. My comment falls into this category (as do most others I post)
"Loser back home" is a label affixed to an expatriate who was a loser in his home country and attempts to craft a new, more glamorous and interesting identity for himself in his new country of residence where no one knows him and the locals are unable to read the cultural signs which mark him as a loser. This often entails knavery, clumsy seductions of local women, public intoxication, and generally shameful behaviour that tarnishes the reputations of all the LBH's fellow expats, causing them to be viewed forever after with suspicion and distaste. Like an alien entering into our atmosphere, we would be captivated by it's differences and oddities, but far from our minds would be the label of a loser no matter how different they seemed.
An LBH is a "special" type of person that just doesn't quite fit in. Back home, they may have been teased, out-cast and shunned and either didn't know how or want to change their behaviour, to be able to socialize on a day-to-day basis with others. This is why so many LBH's flock to China because they are accepted for who they are and not judged and shunned as they would be back in our culture. Their impoliteness, loud mannerisms, overstated opinions and general know-it-all attitude would still make it a difficult process to attain the label of 'loser' in China, but like with any alien, one person will eventually step forward to learn more. It's when you are another Westerner meeting this type of weirdo guy or girl, in China, that you can recognize the social awkwardness and gag reflex behaviours they provoke, and safely look into their eyes (if you can manage this) and think that's an LBH in the flesh!
For those of us who don't possess a finely tuned LBH-radar, here are just a few ways to spot one:
-
Never had a successful career – has moved from place to place and job to job (train wreck to train wreck)
-
Doesn't have a stable family life – often has left a string of broken dysfunctional relationships and a number of children to different partners and has not contributed to the financial support of them (train wreck to train wreck)
-
Is in China because he couldn't make anything of himself in [insert western country name]
-
Lacks self-awareness
-
Has delusions of grandeur (e.g. thinks himself a misunderstood genius)
-
Invents an exciting and interesting background story about his life at home (that doesn't make sense on closer inspection)
-
Indignant/angry/violent when details of his back-story are questioned or discovered to be obviously false
-
Expert on China and all things Chinese (likely to live in a western style gated community, drinks and eats almost exclusively in western style bars and restaurants, has probably never been more than one hour from home-base)
-
Expert on foreign politics, Chinese politics and anything newsworthy and will argue his opinion whether you want to hear it or not.
-
Believes themselves to be untouchable and above the law (I'm an [insert country], they can't do anything to me/I know [insert title of local official they met once])
Dear friends, if you know an LBH or meet one (oh the humanity), smile, agree with everything they say then politely excuse yourself and get the hell away from them. Should you develop a relationship you will be automatically assumed to also be an LBH and when something bad does inevitably occur you will also go down with them.
(Some of this is copied from others and some is original content. This is the internet after-all.)
coineineagh:
A bit of confirmation bias there. Basically you are encouraging people to form their opinion based on firdt impression, avoid any perceived 'strangeness'. Then once the opinion is formed, it must not be checked because all contact must be avoided due to possible violence. There are tons of interesting people who would be avoided this way, and only the well-adjusted boring farts would make it through screening. The warning-signal checklist just encourages mistrustfulness. Before long, you will be reduced to a consumer unit like the rest of China. Identifying an LBH should be done on clear evidence, not on vague impressions and hunches. I've met people who avoided me after one encounter based on minimal info (example: I'm learning to drive after 30), and I'm sure I'm not missing much. You can often read their face like a book, and hear the slow grinding of gears emanating from their earholes. If you listen closely.
iWolf:
You are thinking too much. I certainly didn't think too much when writing it.
That hastily thrown together pile of bollocks is loaded with ill-concieved generalisations, brash stereotypes and more than a few nips of pisstaking.
coineineagh:
Granted. But my remarks are in response to it, not you personally. I have never understood the think-too-much expression.
iWolf:
Thinking too much, to me, refers to over analysing something that doesn't merit analysis. My comment falls into this category (as do most others I post)
What about 'fuk off OP'?
Look yourself in the mirror, before you judge others!
Chinese can call foreigners any name they desire, while kids are asking me at lunch 'How long will you stay at our School?'.
After my A: 'I am not sure, but most likely one year at least.', I can see happy faces around me.
Fact is 'if Chinese won't/can't learn English language, they are surrounding themselves with another wall!'
And you want to know, what means LBH?
You simply don't have a choice, but to accept any foreigner with English grasp.
There are 300 million English students in China! Eat this!
Oh wow, yet another LBH thread...yawn.
Hey OP, you seem bored. Come on over to Wuhan and do a bit of chipping an putting with me. Dont worry about clubs, as I have complete left and right handed sets available. Weather has been off and on though with interchanging sunny and rainy days, so it will be a toss up. Cheers.
I don't have the qualifications I think, but I want to apply for this.
Maybe you can teach me, after all, most chinese are qualified for this.
Simple, if losers in their home country can come to your country and be the best instantly. Better with women, better at their jobs, happier life then it means the people (more specifically the men) are truly pathetic.
(Which continues to puzzle me as to why the Chinese propaganda machine continues to put forth this narrative. )
In America, we are known for attracting the best from other countries. China promotes itself as attracting the worst from other countries and to top it all off these rejects from other country out perform the locals across the board.
How can you tell if a person is a wumao? They post questions like the above.
I can define a person as a loser irrelevant of their geographical location. I believe that loserdom and geographical location are not necessarily directly correlated.
I consider some of the traits of a loser to be lack of empathy, inflated sense of self-worth, selfishness, lack of coping mechanisms and a lack of ability to effectively communicate.
The need for some people to constantly rate others seems psychologically interesting to me. Perhaps they should spend some time in front of the mirror.
I want to point something out.Chinese men are losers everywhere, they gotta pay 10k USD upfront to buy a wife from Laos.
I can go to almost any country including Russia and China and the women would offer to pay me for them to marry me and bring them to America.
Twice women in China offered me at least 300k RMB to marry them.
http://www.echinacities.com/news/Chinas-Leftover-Men-Pay-Agencies-60K-to...
I have mixed feelings about that term, because obviously it's used by shitty people to paint us all, but the concept isn't manufactured out of whole cloth either.
I dont worry about what xenophobic local losers think, but between other expats I apply that term to people with shitty attitudes and grand delusions.
It does NOT apply to somebody who actually makes it here. It's NOT the dude who had a shitty or no job and no luck with women in the west who comes here, does OK with teaching or whatever works his ass off gets married starts a family etc and carries himself like a respectable person. Even though he might have been considered a 'loser' before, i wouldnt call him an LBH cause he used China's opportunity to get his shit together. That guy is no longer a loser by any definition so whats it matter what he was before?
The key word of LBH is 'loser'...meaning they continue to be a loser. The LBH is the guy or girl who can't hold down a decent job or functional relationships here either...but who enjoys and relishes in the sort of elevated foreigner status and the attention they can get without any effort. The person with the terrible attitude who manages to keep squeaking by because there is always a ESL school desperate enough to hire them. And yet they maintain a grandiose superior attitude.
I guess it's the difference between an opportunity loser and a personality loser. The first guy was probably itching to go his whole life just had nothing interesting come along and maybe not tons of ambition. But he moved to China and became who he always was...a solid hardworking dude.
But the personality loser is a "wherever you go there you are" kind of loser. There isn't a situation in the world they could thrive in because the problem is they can't get on with people. But in china they get a certain narcissistic validation from all the attention.
Shining_brow:
I think, by your definition, Buddha was a loser... (so was Jesus as he's usually depicted).
expatlife26:
not sure where you're going with that.
My point is just the term should only be used for people who are still losers. If someone was a loser before they came here and have since become a decent responsible person they aren't a LBH.
They should still be a fuck-up and kinda coasting on their mere foreigness in china to avoid utter destitution.
The first guy, you send them back home they are bringing something back they didn't have when they left through personal growth.
The second guy can maintain a grandiose facade that would disappear the second they weren't special by default. That's the LBH
Shining_brow:
What I'm getting at is that 'loser' is a standard imposed by society's rules about what a person should or should not be like as an adult. Certain conformities that are expected to be abided by. Much of that is very superficial.
However, if there's a sinking ship and limited life-jackets, some of those 'losers' should be kept alive, while some of the socially acceptable should be allowed to drown.
(no, I'm not saying ALL... just making a point that the OP was trying to make... maybe the tag isn't so easy to define...).
coineineagh:
I have to agree with Shining here, that most people define a loser by failure OR non-adherence in traditional fields of success (relationships and career). The first paragraph was true, that the value judhement is used by shitty people. I met someone who even I'd define as a loser in China, and although I had to avoid him in the end, I tried to interact normally with him. I sooner avoid overly judgmental people than strange ones, because extreme conformity destroys community spirit and breeds fundamentalism.
Success is subjective and subject to personal criteria. Failure, or losing in life, means you don't meet your own success standards. Expatlife26 adds the ambition factor, but this is again arbitrary. If it is my ambition to play as many computer games as I can in life, I am regarded a loser, but do not feel like one. We can get all philosophical about it, like how face changes the psychological dynamic. If you attempt something, then failing in public means loss of face, so by not trying, you avoid having to face failure - lack of coping mechanisms is a good point.
My take is this: if you have come to realise that robustness, resilience and adaptability are key to success in life, then you were never a loser, no matter what people say, and no matter what path you walked down.
The hardest thing in life, is being wrong. Failure/loserdom is part of this. If you can handle being wrong, to yourself and others, success is inevitable. People who can't cope with being wrong, betray clear personal vulnerabilities to a keen observer. A person who can face up to his/her errors and move forward without getting sidetracked, has few gimmicks to be exploited.
Working for EF does. lol
icnif77:
Tangshan EF was my first gig in 2009. S. African DOS wrote an excellent Recommendation letter, and all new employers go: 'Wow, you worked at EF? That's great English school....'
Shining_brow:
Not to judge many people I know, but the same would be said for most other training mills.
But then, for many... it''s just a way to have a working holiday :p Or just a change of pace.
I guess all Chinese living abroad are losers back home.
coineineagh:
Losers officially, but viewed with envy in secret. Jumping ship with some cheddar is the rat's greatest dream. Once achieved though, YMMV.
